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Old 09-28-2010, 12:46 PM
 
1,858 posts, read 3,535,357 times
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Isnt 40 too old to have a baby?....my husband and I have been married for over a year and he wants a baby.

I already have 3 kids..2 are adults and 1 is 10 years old. I dont want anymore although I would love to have a part of him.

Any insights?
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Old 09-28-2010, 12:54 PM
 
Location: Arizona
1,034 posts, read 4,380,900 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DONNIEANDDONNA417 View Post
Isnt 40 too old to have a baby?....my husband and I have been married for over a year and he wants a baby.

I already have 3 kids..2 are adults and 1 is 10 years old. I dont want anymore although I would love to have a part of him.

Any insights?
American culture tells you that 40 is too old. But other cultures will tell you otherwise. Women in the Middle East traditionally keep having kids until they can't anymore, well into their 40's. I have a friend from there who now lives here and her and her friends were in their 40's having children (some of them their first children). The risks are slightly higher, so they'll monitor you closer and may recommend an amnio. No big deal.

Give it a lot of thought before you jump on board. At 40, you won't have the energy you did in your 20's, but it still can be done without a doubt.

I have another friend who is 42 and pregnant with baby #2. They told her in her mid-thirties that she'd never have any children, so she never used any form of birth control and became pregnant at 40 with her first child.

I am 35 trying for baby #1. It isn't as easy as it would have been 10 years ago, and I'm afraid I may be facing some fertility challenges. But I wish you the best of luck.
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Old 09-28-2010, 01:02 PM
 
889 posts, read 2,702,884 times
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My husband accuses me of playing devil's advocate. I'm just bringing up questions. If you don't want anymore, then....? Did you tell him that before you got married? Is your marriage strong? Are you youthful? There are "young" 40 year olds, and "old" 40 year olds. What does your ten year old say? What do your adult children say? What does your body say? If you have a strong marriage, your doctor says it's okay, and your other children are on board, why not???? If you're healthy, 40 isn't too old for a baby. Best wishes!
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Old 09-28-2010, 02:23 PM
 
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At 55 I love my grandkids but I sure don't think I would want to be dealing with a 15 year old!
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Old 09-28-2010, 02:54 PM
 
1,858 posts, read 3,535,357 times
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Originally Posted by grannynancy View Post
At 55 I love my grandkids but I sure don't think I would want to be dealing with a 15 year old!
my feelings exactly
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Old 09-28-2010, 03:01 PM
 
Location: Canada
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I would not agree to have a baby at 40. I'm 35 with 3 kids and I have an 11 month old and I have no energy with all the sleep deprivation. I would not want to go though pregnancy at 40.
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Old 09-28-2010, 03:11 PM
 
Location: Ohio
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In your 40's you are at higher risk of having a Downs Syndrome baby.............I think you and your husband better decide what you will do in that circumstance before you decide to go for it.
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Old 09-28-2010, 05:19 PM
 
Location: East Nashville, 37206
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^^^Yes, I went to a women's health class & it was shocking to see the rate of down syndrome skyrocket based on the mother's age, here's a chart: Frequency of Down syndrome per maternal age

Courtney
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Old 09-28-2010, 05:24 PM
 
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Personally, I wouldn't want to have a kid at 40. But my opinion may be swayed by the fact that I already have a son and I don't feel the urgency to have another child.
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Old 09-28-2010, 05:30 PM
 
1,933 posts, read 3,738,318 times
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Hey how come this isn't in the pregnancy subforum in parenting? I think its a good thread for that area. Personally as much as I want more kids I would definitely not have one at 40. I have an Aunt that had a child at 40 and she is now in her fifties pulling her hair out between the grandkids she had from her first child at 20 and her 12 year old child now.
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