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Old 07-27-2012, 08:00 AM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,157 posts, read 13,999,826 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Normal people don't stare when they're caught. Continuing to stare is usually a sign that they're a bit "off" in some way, that's how I'd read it. Unless you reminded her of someone, and she was trying to figure out if you were some guy she remembered from somewhere. Still, I'm with the "creepy" verdict. Did you try smiling, to see if she'd respond or look away? When someone is staring at me, I give them the benefit of the doubt, and give them a smile. If they keep staring, I get out of the way, I flee the scene.
I gave a little smile and a slight head nod, acknowledging her presence. It's really not that big of a deal, though. It's unlikely I'll ever cross paths with her again, let alone share a long elevator ride alone with her. Hopefully.
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Old 07-28-2012, 07:57 PM
 
Location: Texas
5,068 posts, read 10,130,330 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iknowftbll View Post
I'm not sure if the psychology forum is the right place to share this odd encounter, so if a moderator feels it should be moved to another thread, so be it.

This afternoon I was leaving a large medical facility. As I approached the elevator, a woman was there waiting. When the elevator arrived, she stepped in and I followed. She did not ask what floor (basic elevator etiquette) but it was okay because we were both going down to the ground floor. She pushed the button and backed into one corner, and I assumed my position in the opposite corner.

Now here is where it got weird. The front of the elevator was clad in mirrors. Aside from being a bit tacky, it enabled me to notice something weird about my "travel companion." I was staring at the floor and my eyes eventually wandered around. I caught this woman "staring at me" in the mirror, and we made "eye contact." Fair enough, thought I. After all, it is not uncommon for our eyes to wander to the only unique feature around, which in this scenario was me. But when I caught her "staring," she did not break her gaze or turn away. You ever been caught staring?

Don't you look away as soon as the other person notices you looking at them?

Now this woman was probably 30-35 or so, and I'm 32. I figured at first that she must have liked the way I look. (Silly me. Ego, right? ) But as the elevator ride continued, I chanced a couple more glances at her reflection and her stare did not seem to indicate that she found me attractive. It was an intense look. Not quite a "I'm going to kill you slowly and painfully" look, not quite angry, but definitely not friendly. I smiled. No emotion from her at all. I mean NONE. And the whole ride down, staring. It was somewhat chilling.

Finally the elevator stopped at the ground floor and I waited for her to exit. Her gaze stayed on me (not my reflection anymore) for a few steps before turning away. Then she was on her way and I on mine. I took a quick self assessment to make sure that I was in a presentable form. (IE: pants zipped, no big ugly boogers hanging from my nose, etc...) Nothing wrong, there.

Sort of made me wonder what was on her mind. Anyone ever have something like this happen?

Thoughts?
I would've made some chit-chat with the lady, assuming she hadn't painted her eye lids...
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Old 07-31-2012, 10:01 PM
 
1,206 posts, read 2,927,376 times
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that is very creepy. Who knows what she was thinking. If you see her again in the elevator before you get in, take the stairs.
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Old 08-03-2012, 12:50 PM
 
Location: Texas
3,984 posts, read 5,014,494 times
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Hey, thanks for the story...it's kind of funny, but I do have another possibility...paranoid as it might be.

Maybe she got freaked out about being in the elevator alone with a man...like she might be worried about her safety?

But come to think of it, you'd think a Captain could kick some butt...maybe she was intimidated though and had to keep her eye on you...or maybe she hates the Denver Broncos? hehe
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Old 08-03-2012, 11:19 PM
 
Location: USA
1,952 posts, read 4,789,116 times
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^Was going to suggest the same thing.
I imagine she was somewhat leery of you because you are a man and you two were in an enclosed space.
Guess she was warning you that she was watching you.

I would feel a bit uncomfortable riding an elevator with a strange man.

I don't think I would STARE at them, though (mirror or otherwise).
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Old 08-04-2012, 08:34 AM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,157 posts, read 13,999,826 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShellNic View Post
Hey, thanks for the story...it's kind of funny, but I do have another possibility...paranoid as it might be.

Maybe she got freaked out about being in the elevator alone with a man...like she might be worried about her safety?

But come to think of it, you'd think a Captain could kick some butt...maybe she was intimidated though and had to keep her eye on you...or maybe she hates the Denver Broncos? hehe
This is a very good possibility. Yes, you would think that a Captain would know to be assertive, and I doubt that it is the first time that she has ever had to ride down an elevator alone with a man who she does not know. Who knows. And of course, maybe you are on to something about her hating the Broncos! Maybe she is a Chiefs or Raiders fan!
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Old 08-05-2012, 08:48 AM
 
Location: NYC
16,062 posts, read 26,741,423 times
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Really creepy. Maybe you thought she was staring at you, but really wasn't, she could have been lost in her thoughts and just staring through you. But, seriously creepy.
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Old 08-05-2012, 06:55 PM
 
5,190 posts, read 4,837,945 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Normal people don't stare when they're caught. Continuing to stare is usually a sign that they're a bit "off" in some way, that's how I'd read it.
it's a bit 'off' in the West I agree, but head to East Asia and staring is a national pass-time!

Everyday where I live I get the serious eyeball treatment - and you just have to get used to it because everyone does it - it's still annoying though.

Thailand, China, Cambodia, Laos, Vietnam - they all do it.

why?
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Old 01-06-2013, 03:31 AM
 
Location: The Island of Misfit Toys
2,765 posts, read 2,792,220 times
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I think your mistake was making eye contact a second time. You shouldn't initiate eye contact with a woman in a situation like that a second time, if even at all. I think she tolerated the first glance because it is a natural kind of motion/behavior but a second glance is unnatural. The first glance is okay because it is a natural instinct to check out your surroundings. But when you looked at her the second time you gave her reason to think you did because she was a woman and you were getting "ideas." You already confirmed she was there and a woman. Why look again? The first look is just like a silent, innocent confirmation "okay, woman there" but the second look is you saying "I'm looking for more."

You did say her unfriendly face appeared the second time you made eye contact with her, correct? If so, that would support my hypotheses.

P.S. I think her staring comes from an instinct to want to remember your face in case you attacked her. The more you looked back at her, the more concerned she grew and therefore the stronger and more steady her stare became. If you had just left it at the one eye contact her stare might have eased up, though you never would have known it.

Last edited by Shankapotomus; 01-06-2013 at 03:48 AM..
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Old 01-06-2013, 05:10 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, MO
3,565 posts, read 7,977,924 times
Reputation: 2605
^If she's going to stare at him, he can sure as hell give her multiple glances.
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