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View Poll Results: how do you feel about your life?
Life sucks, no point of living, maybe dying is less painful. 17 10.56%
life is meaningless, boring, depressing, sad. 26 16.15%
life is what you make of it, but dont look forward to anything 34 21.12%
life has ups and downs, but its still good 45 27.95%
life is ok, more good than bad 22 13.66%
life is awesome, if I die i will not regret anything, happy everyday 17 10.56%
Voters: 161. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 12-28-2012, 05:53 PM
 
213 posts, read 1,108,921 times
Reputation: 292

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Life is OK on a very, very rare occasion. For me anyway. More downs than ups that is for sure. I personally don't like how society is these days. It makes life very difficult. I am still fairly young, but at the same time it's hard to see things dramatically changing for me. I believe living is hard and life is a test. A test to see if you can make it through to the end I guess. So, I am aiming to hang in there until my time is up...whenever that may be.
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Old 12-29-2012, 01:56 PM
 
Location: Gettysburg, PA
3,055 posts, read 2,941,893 times
Reputation: 7188
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope View Post
It starts with your parents, if you were never loved as a child it seems to set you up for a lifetime of struggle.

This is very true. Those who were loved as children do not have any idea how fortunate they are.
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Old 12-29-2012, 02:23 PM
 
19,133 posts, read 27,760,437 times
Reputation: 20299
Philosophically and stoically. But I know what it's all about, and that helps to take the right way.
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Old 12-29-2012, 02:37 PM
 
Location: Aventura FL
868 posts, read 1,124,068 times
Reputation: 1176
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope View Post
Lately, I am feeling very resentful.

Resentful that my life has been so hard and loveless.

It starts with your parents, if you were never loved as a child it seems to set you up for a lifetime of struggle.

It's only now in my late 40's that I am realising just how much I was cheated out of.

So many ingrates on this forum, complaining that their mother did this, their sister said that...at least you HAVE a goddam family~!
You're not old. In fact, having seen many of your posts, you have a youthful attitude.

But you're right. It all starts from how you you were raised. If you were unloved, neglected, abused, pushed aside or mistreated as a child, 9 times out of 10 you'll struggle with adulthood with abandonment or trust issues. Armchair psychologists make it out to be so easy to just snap out of it, but it isn't. While you should try not to go through life regretting or ruminating over the past, it's hard to do when you were never given the foundations needed to develop coping skills.
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Old 12-29-2012, 03:35 PM
 
Location: Australia
4,001 posts, read 6,285,992 times
Reputation: 6856
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hombre View Post
You're not old. In fact, having seen many of your posts, you have a youthful attitude.

But you're right. It all starts from how you you were raised. If you were unloved, neglected, abused, pushed aside or mistreated as a child, 9 times out of 10 you'll struggle with adulthood with abandonment or trust issues. Armchair psychologists make it out to be so easy to just snap out of it, but it isn't. While you should try not to go through life regretting or ruminating over the past, it's hard to do when you were never given the foundations needed to develop coping skills.
Thanks

I have spent many years telling myself that the past didn't matter and that my kids were going to have a different childhood, which they did. Loved and spoiled beyond reason.

It is only now that they are repeating certain behaviours that I recognise from my own family, that reality is setting in.

I thought I broke the cycle of abuse with my kids...but I married an emotionally abusive man (just like my mother) who has now taught them to emotionally abuse me.

And so it goes.
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Old 12-29-2012, 07:33 PM
 
Location: Aventura FL
868 posts, read 1,124,068 times
Reputation: 1176
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope View Post
Thanks

I have spent many years telling myself that the past didn't matter and that my kids were going to have a different childhood, which they did. Loved and spoiled beyond reason.

It is only now that they are repeating certain behaviours that I recognise from my own family, that reality is setting in.

I thought I broke the cycle of abuse with my kids...but I married an emotionally abusive man (just like my mother) who has now taught them to emotionally abuse me.

And so it goes.
That's awful, I'm really sorry. I hate the fact that the abusers seem to get away with it, while the abused are left to pick up the pieces and are told to "get therapy" or "get over it". My mother was emotionally and physically abused by one of her husbands and I saw the effect first hand. He also attempted to brainwash us and make her look crazy. I never bought it and resent the man to this day for not only laying a hand on my mother, but also trying to brainwash me and his biological children into thinking he was some sort of perfect man before he did what he did.

I hope your children are able to see the truth. I don't doubt that you were a good parent and did everything in your power to be just that.
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Old 12-29-2012, 09:19 PM
 
Location: Louisiana
494 posts, read 1,612,197 times
Reputation: 434
I'm somewhere between the second and third option I guess. Post-Suicidal, no-friends, many failures and rergets, my gender dyphoria, have made my life pretty miserable so far. Yet, somehow I was able to come back from that dark abyss of severe depression a few years ago, and now I only consider myself moderately depressed. Beacause of this, I feel like I'm just going through the motions with my life at the moment. I like my job, but outside of that, I feel like it has no meaning, no purpose, and not really going anywhere. However, I feel like the dark cycle will end someday if I work with what I got, even if it's not a whole lot. I just dunno when that will be...
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Old 12-30-2012, 05:19 AM
 
11,558 posts, read 12,084,404 times
Reputation: 17758
Since feelings change many times throughout the day, I don't allow feelings to control me - knowing they are temporary.

I face each day with the understanding there are some things I can do something about, and there are some instances I don't have control over. But I don't dwell on it and do the best I can in any given circumstance.
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Old 01-02-2013, 02:35 AM
 
23 posts, read 42,805 times
Reputation: 57
is awesome, if I die i will not regret anything, happy everyday

I chose this because it is true. I love my life. I have a wonderful family, many good friends, nice house, lots of travel, and most of all, I am glad my family and I have good health. I have no regrets and no wishes to change anything.
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Old 01-02-2013, 05:40 AM
 
Location: Perth, Western Australia
3,187 posts, read 4,600,392 times
Reputation: 2395
I wouldn't call my own childhood ideal, I have a loving, well-intentioned but emotionally volatile mother who did her best on her own and away from extended family. While I'm fortunate to have some good, understanding friends, I was forming an increasingly negative and ultimately fatalistic mindset of being unworthy which leaves me quite on edge and stressed out most of the time. It's been slowly building for awhile but it's something I've previously just left in the "it'll get better tomorrow" basket.

Realising the nature of my problems and slowly learning to acknowledging the back history is a difficult thing, but for me it's a matter of going 1 step back to get 2 steps forward. I started attending contemplative meditation and Buddhist philosophy classes about 6 months ago about and have been going swimming about 3-4 times a week to try and improve both my physical and spiritual health both of which have helped so far. Still need to get on to the quitting smoking bit though...one thing at a time.
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