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I feel very sheltered and inexperienced. I didn't dorm in college, and I didn't move out of my parent's house until I was 25. I had a tight group of friends who didn't venture out much like me. I stayed in the same city for 20+ years until recently and I feel I have missed out on so much. I didn't watch much TV or movies growing up either. I read and watched Chinese movies.
I'm tired of feeling ignorant all the time. I feel like the girl from Nell who grew up in the woods from society and recently moved in to the city. Not to that extent but not far from it.
I wish I had bartended the last two years when I was in grad school. I would have learned so much about people and how to talk to them. Well, I didn't and I'm a little better than when I first started school but if someone who had been living in the woods their whole life just came out and asked you to incorporate them in to society, what would you tell them?
I feel very sheltered and inexperienced. I didn't dorm in college, and I didn't move out of my parent's house until I was 25. I had a tight group of friends who didn't venture out much like me. I stayed in the same city for 20+ years until recently and I feel I have missed out on so much. I didn't watch much TV or movies growing up either. I read and watched Chinese movies.
I'm tired of feeling ignorant all the time. I feel like the girl from Nell who grew up in the woods from society and recently moved in to the city. Not to that extent but not far from it.
I wish I had bartended the last two years when I was in grad school. I would have learned so much about people and how to talk to them. Well, I didn't and I'm a little better than when I first started school but if someone who had been living in the woods their whole life just came out and asked you to incorporate them in to society, what would you tell them?
This post represents quite a difference from the other thread you started -- What does it really mean to be happy alone/single? In that one, you mentioned that, among positive attributes, you were smart. Now you are "feeling ignorant all the time" ... leading a sheltered life is one thing and feeling inexperienced is not unusual for a woman who is still in her 20s, but for someone who attended graduate school, it does not do much to boost a person's self-esteem to use the word ignorant.
I feel very sheltered and inexperienced. I didn't dorm in college, and I didn't move out of my parent's house until I was 25.
I wish I had bartended the last two years when I was in grad school. I would have learned so much about people and how to talk to them. Well, I didn't and I'm a little better than when I first started school but if someone who had been living in the woods their whole life just came out and asked you to incorporate them in to society, what would you tell them?
I wish you had bartended, too. You'd have learned much about people. I ran a cash register for years in HS and college before finding more lucrative work befitting a young professional. I learned that people could be nice, or scummy, or both at the same time. That's the real trick to life, I've determined now in my late 40s. End of the day, "trust, but verify!"
I was born on second base and mistakenly thought I'd hit a double in the game of life. Took many years on my own to figure out that was wrong, I was about your age when I grew up and stopped the partying ways that led me to no good. Fortunately, they didn't kill or harm me or others, either. But they could have.
Not sure how a woman gets street-smarts. As a man, I took it upon myself in my 30s to hang out with working class people a few years, friendships that lasted a while but never long-term (waitresses, strippers, others service or trades-type employees, that sort of thing). They barely tolerated me, classes don't mix well in this country if we think Low-Middle-High. I was in Middle and striving for low-end of High at the time. I did learn much from those friends, though it could be uncomfortable. I am not judging, as some of them learned a little from me as-well: how to be successful without blaming some mysterious force for "keeping them down." That is the trap many poor fall into, that it's not their fault but someone else's. The minute I took responsibility was the minute I started moving from second base to third. Yet another great lesson in life street-smarts is that no one gives you anything, you have to take it.
Getting more street smarts as a man meant trekking into the slightly-darker underbelly of the streets. A woman could be harmed there faster than a man, Law of the Jungle applies and equal-opportunity anything doesn't when facing a goon with a weapon or some vagrant with a busted bottle and want of your money. At those times, immediate and proportional violence is simply the only thing that will save you, harder (but not impossible) for most women than men. Unless you're trained in Krav Maga, Judo, or various street fighting arts. Few are; that would imply "street smarts" to begin with.
So for a lady your age, find some street-wise friends if they'll have you around from the gym or aerobics studio you belong to. I'd say "find a working-class boyfriend" but those relationships can be tumultuous and the lessons learned may or may not be via School of Hard Knocks. I don't know many easier ways that that.
Otherwise, if you're presentable, marry a man of means and go into denial-mode by simply not acknowledging the rabble. Then host parties in only the best parts of town, with well-connected friends, and make political pronunciations based on limited knowledge and belief that there is "unvarnished truth". Think "regattas on summer Saturdays." In fact I just came back from one today, that's why I find this post so amusing. Having lived in the Middle, flirted well with the High, and given my nodding acquaintance with the Low, it's truly fascinating switching between the social norms of each and donning a new persona to "fit in", while still seeing the underlying joke to all of it. The social rules, I mean.
I would say: Start by joining some groups where you will meet different kinds of people. Take a class, join a club, do some volunteer work. Go explore places or activities you haven't tried before: museums, concerts, political meetings, whatever. Try talking to strangers - I don't mean buttonholing them for serious discussion, but just striking up a casual conversation while you're waiting in line. (I once started talking to someone who came out of the same movie I did, and we ended up talking for a whole hour.) Make a list of things that interest you, that you would be curious to explore, and then look for groups involved in those areas.
I feel very sheltered and inexperienced. I didn't dorm in college, and I didn't move out of my parent's house until I was 25. I had a tight group of friends who didn't venture out much like me. I stayed in the same city for 20+ years until recently and I feel I have missed out on so much. I didn't watch much TV or movies growing up either. I read and watched Chinese movies.
I'm tired of feeling ignorant all the time. I feel like the girl from Nell who grew up in the woods from society and recently moved in to the city. Not to that extent but not far from it.
I wish I had bartended the last two years when I was in grad school. I would have learned so much about people and how to talk to them. Well, I didn't and I'm a little better than when I first started school but if someone who had been living in the woods their whole life just came out and asked you to incorporate them in to society, what would you tell them?
so you may be a little bit sheltered,,,so what??
my advice to you is ...appreciate what you have ...
thousands, if not millions of young men and women .... that are more exposed to culture, activities, go down the wrong path,,,unwanted pregnancies, drugs, alcohol abuse...
why would you feel ignorant..????
young lady... steer your own ship,,don't wallow in the currents of others
we all get dealt different cards in life...if you hate the cards that are dealt to you,,,then deal your own,,,,, that's the beauty of life,,,you can be and do just about anything you want..
look thru the bright windshield of life,,,not thru the rearview mirror of regret
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