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I never feel as if I get enough done. At work I always feel as though I should have been able to do more, and at home I feel as if my house is never clean enough and that there's always something else that has to be done. I work long hours and have a very long commute, so the house gets neglected. I live alone and rarely have company, but it matters to me.
I've been home from work for two weeks--short version, had surgery that didn't go as planned, turned into a major cancer scare, found out Thursday from the doctor that it's a non-cancerous condition that can be treated. Had to see the surgeon yesterday, started medication yesterday that has a potential side effect of sleeplessness and found myself still awake at 5 a.m. Had to get up at 8 to test blood sugar and take meds again before 9 a.m. Was sort of a zombie today, took a nap from 3 to 6, felt better, and finally got around to doing something productive--sorted the piles of mail I have into recycling and stuff that needs attention. But I'm not done--and now I have a pile of paper sitting in the middle of the living room floor. I feel as if something is wrong with me--why I can't I keep up with stuff the way other people do? I thought I'd have today to catch up and run some errands now that I know death from cancer isn't imminent, but I just blew the whole day because I couldn't sleep last night and I just couldn't think straight. I'm way behind because I was so anxious while waiting for my biopsy results that I had a hard time concentrating enough to do the things I should have been doing.
I can keep up with the basics, vacuum, clean the kitchen, clean the bathroom, but now clothes have to be put away for the season, rugs have to be shampooed, etc. There are weeds in the garden. It never ends. Everyone else I know has these nice neat lovely clean places all the time and it seems to take them no effort. I feel as if I just can't keep up and I can't relax because there's always too much that has to be done. And then my brain just STOPS because all the things I have to do crash into one another in my head and I don't know where to even start. Or I start one thing but then get distracted and start something else and have a bunch of half-finished things everywhere.
I realize this sounds like ADD or something, lol, but I don't have that. I just can't seem to get myself organized properly and it's getting worse as I get older. Are there any tricks anyone has to getting oneself together and getting things DONE?
No tricks here. I do have ADD and that sounds like my entire life in a nutshell. Add on a pile of guilt for all the people I've failed. Every time I've gone on a trip and forgot something really basic, like a toothbrush.
It does sound you're stressing over your medical issues and I know what it took for you to go to the doctor and that was major MQ, so go easy on yourself. OK? And I'm glad it's not as bad as you thought.
You seem very competent. Competent people delegate small stuff, so they can attend to big stuff. Your physical and emotional health and your job are big stuff.
Hire a housekeeper, an accountant, a gardener, even if it's only on a temporary basis.
You seem very competent. Competent people delegate small stuff, so they can attend to big stuff. Your physical and emotional health and your job are big stuff.
Hire a housekeeper, an accountant, a gardener, even if it's only on a temporary basis.
None if that is in my budget, but it sure sounds good! I'll get through it all. I just get overwhelmed sometimes and so I had just had to vent.
None of that is in my budget, but it sure sounds good! I'll get through it all. I just get overwhelmed sometimes and so I had just had to vent.
Thanks for reading my whining.
Although a housekeeper is something you could not sustainably afford, it might be something worth doing in a short term situation like this. They don't cost all that much, really, on a one time basis. Lots of people have them come in once or twice a year for deep cleaning. In addition, I'm not sure about this, but I'd be astounded if some kind of home assistance isn't available for cheap or free to people who live alone and have short term medical needs or other difficulties where they can't do it for themselves. It's worth checking out locally anyway. Your health insurance may even provide an LPN during convalescence, since it's cheaper than keeping you in a hospital.
Just a few ideas for what they may or may not be worth.
First off Mightyqueen801,"why can't I keep up with stuff like other people do" needs to be thrown from your thoughts..You're not other people, you're you. Every ones ideas of what needs doing and what doesn't is different. I think that the fact that you can keep up with what you call the "basics" is nothing to be scoffed at. That's more than some people ever do, and they haven't been going through the anxiety and stress that you have lately. Hang in there...give yourself time to relax, put your feet up. Let that side of yourself come out once in awhile and give the part of you that says "I've got so much to do" a rest...really..it's ok to have weeds in the garden ...it's ok to not clean the bathroom sometimes...
I never feel as if I get enough done. At work I always feel as though I should have been able to do more, and at home I feel as if my house is never clean enough and that there's always something else that has to be done. I work long hours and have a very long commute, so the house gets neglected. I live alone and rarely have company, but it matters to me.
I've been home from work for two weeks--short version, had surgery that didn't go as planned, turned into a major cancer scare, found out Thursday from the doctor that it's a non-cancerous condition that can be treated.
First of all, let me tell you how happy I am that your condition is non-cancerous! I know you've been going through h*ll with all the worry, so I'm glad that you finally got some good news.
Second of all, I think you're being VERY hard on yourself. Long hours and a long commute are very tiring...I'm sure that when you get home, you just want to put your feet up and relax.
So these people you're comparing yourself to...do they live alone or do they have significant others? It makes a HUGE difference when you're totally dependent on yourself and don't have someone else to lean on. I think you need to cut yourself a break. As someone who's in a life situation that's somewhat similiar to yours, I totally understand. Please...be kind to yourself.
MQ, at the risk of sounding redundant, I must totally agree with the others. You're right that it always seems there's something more to be done. I feel that way almost every day, the syndrome known here as: It Never Freakin' Ends! Please take time to treat yourself with even the smallest rewards. I think you deserve it.
Thrilled that your condition is not as serious as previously thought. I celebrate with you! Cheers, my friend.
I have ADD and struggle with everyday tasks, too. What you said about why it seems so easy for others and not me really rings true for me. It is possible you have ADD, there are online tests to give you an idea. Even if you never do anything about it (I do not take anything) it may help you forgive yourself a bit more. On days where I really struggle with feeling overwhelmed and stuck and want to avoid doing what I need to to, I use a timer. I set the timer for a certain amount of time where I can relax or play on the computer, sometimes 15 minutes, sometimes longer. Then I set the timer for 10 minutes, and do something on my to-do list, just for that ten minutes. It doesn't even matter if I complete something, or jump from task to task, as long as it is something I need to do. Then I repeat the cycle. At the end of the day, you'd be amazed how much you got done in those 10-minute spurts. Often just beginning things are the hardest part, but if you know it only has to be for 10 minutes it is much more bearable.
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And I'm glad it's not as bad as you thought.
