What is with the BULLYING?

[elyn02]

Originally Posted by tinytrump

Another shooting in school due to bullying? have parenst NOt taken a look to see whats going on at home with kids? I don't get this? Communication and technology are so available to kids today how come adults do not seem to know whats going on ?? the little gal on CNN said the boy had been bullied... where are the parents? I raised 3 and one was bullied and it was taken care of, whats is happening with our kids?? when will adult become responsible to parent their children? :cry ing:

Tinytrump, for some cultures, it is not that easy to identify bullying and to know how to stop it. Adults view children who have not developed "thick skin" as helpless who need to learn "to toughen up." I have only found two ways to toughen up. One, is to have a support systems that is there when you need it and who can guide you on how to protect yourself. This protection is missing for many children.

Instead, some are thrown into the lion's den. They will be weak for many years but after fighting with lions and surviving, they will toughen up. But what will that kind of toughness be exactly? Surely not the same as the child who was provided with support. These children were given no choice but to face the lions.

The difference is that the children with support usually can decide when they are ready to face them however. For the most part, they know how to steer clear of them. While the other children, who had no choice but to face them, do not steer clear but take them on and sometimes with guns. You know, because, they gotta be tough.

[PA2UK]

Originally Posted by tinytrump

quote((I think this is the wrong forum for this topic. This probably belongs in the Politics and other Controversies forum.)

I think my question is NOT political! and I was bullied and in no way tell my parents, but I watched my kids to make sure they weren't the bullys, or being attacked. Has it gotten worse or better? I'd say the same, my question and I have had that question for years why are there bullys? Ok drunk pop, crazy mom, but many are coming from decent homes?? -and Kids now think a shootout is the answer? We used to duke it out behind the school or at the playground, that little gal lost alot of hair one day,,, but now kids got to jail n get a record for that. So how do kids deal with it? Parents should be more aware in recognizing these things just like child abuse. What was NOT talked about during my era, is now- so I dont get it.

Because it's not that simple. Kids still don't want to talk about it - kids being bullied still feel ashamed and try to hide it and the kids doing the bullying certainly aren't going to let any adults know about it. I'm sorry but it's not as simple as "watching your kids to make sure they aren't bullies or being bullied" - it could have been happening without you ever knowing about it. In my case, my parents knew something was wrong, they just didn't know what exactly, but in other cases the parents might not even be able to tell that much. And as for being able to tell that your child IS the bully, that's even less likely unless a third party outright informs you. If you think your children were incapable of hiding things from you, you're very naive.