Why do people think introverts are weak? (characteristics, sociopath, introversion)
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From my personal observations and that "gift" of knowing, I would say that a great many introverts are exactly that. They think there is something wrong with them. Society forces that image upon them. Why? Because they don't know what that quiet person is thinking...because they're not shooting off their mouths, saying everything that comes into their heads. People fear what they don't know.
Let's face it, if you know how someone is feeling, do you really need to ask? When you encounter people, who say one thing but are feeling something entirely different....when you see people's lies and fakeness, because you can SEE and FEEL who and what they are, and what they're REALLY thinking, why wouldn't you be an introvert? You avoid the chaos.
I couldn't do what you do every day, TracySam. I have this thing called "the honesty button". Hahaha. I call BS. I never used to. I used to bury this like there was no tomorrow. Not any more. I uncover the truth.
I used to try to help out friends when they were needing a 'friend'. Part of it was empathy, part having been there. One woman, I tried and tried and finally as she kept crashing harder and harder, I had to go. I was trying to tell her what she didn't want to hear. She simply didn't want to. I never went back, thought I was tempted to drive by and check.
The worse emphatic moment was waiting for a bus. I was sitting on the bench when this woman and her son sat near me. It was as if a dark cloud had sprouted, and a deep darkness was all I 'got' from her. The boy was ignoring her and hitting her and she responded to neither. The feeling was so opressive I had to get up and move further up the bus stop. But I could 'see' an actual darkness around her.
Others have said it was a warning of impending death, but the whole sadness about her was so immense, I wouldn't be surprised if she was going to take her life, or someone near her finally end the abuse.
I've kept 'it' held back a lot since that. But when I do let it out fully, its can be amazing. Held back, it feels like only part of me is there, but I don't want to see darkness like that .
IMO, I don't think people in this country are as extroverted as they think they are. I think most say they are because it is what society wants them to be.
Most are extroverted when they are drunk, and since this is an epidemic at times, that results in a lot of false extroversion. Wisconsinites, not surprisingly, self identify themselves as one of the most extroverted states, and guess what they're also known for: their alcohol consumption.
I used to try to help out friends when they were needing a 'friend'. Part of it was empathy, part having been there. One woman, I tried and tried and finally as she kept crashing harder and harder, I had to go. I was trying to tell her what she didn't want to hear. She simply didn't want to. I never went back, thought I was tempted to drive by and check.
The worse emphatic moment was waiting for a bus. I was sitting on the bench when this woman and her son sat near me. It was as if a dark cloud had sprouted, and a deep darkness was all I 'got' from her. The boy was ignoring her and hitting her and she responded to neither. The feeling was so opressive I had to get up and move further up the bus stop. But I could 'see' an actual darkness around her.
Others have said it was a warning of impending death, but the whole sadness about her was so immense, I wouldn't be surprised if she was going to take her life, or someone near her finally end the abuse.
I've kept 'it' held back a lot since that. But when I do let it out fully, its can be amazing. Held back, it feels like only part of me is there, but I don't want to see darkness like that .
I know of that dark, oppressive cloud...that ominous, cold shadow, looming over someone. It is a horrible thing, especially when it's someone you love.
The most important thing I ever had to learn, about having these gifts is this.....I can NOT save anyone. I can do a lot of things, can use a lot of words and show a lot of love. I can tell someone what is going to happen if they continue to ________ (whatever), but I can NOT make them believe. I can tell them the truth, but only THEY are the ones who can choose whether to listen or not. I am NOT responsible for their response or how they choose to handle that information.
Listen, I'm one of those people who says, "It isn't MY life. I don't need anyone else's garbage messing with my peace.", however, sometimes...I don't have a choice, but to temporarily engage myself into a situation. Many are the times when I am so strongly compelled to step in and say something, that I can only attribute it to my Creator. To attempt to avoid that compelling force, TRULY feels as if I am disobeying a direct order. I HAVE avoided that force, and refused to engage, then had to watch people suffer the same fate that I had seen for them. I can't handle that guilt. I'd rather someone be mad at me, think I'm crazy, think I'm a know-it-all, think I'm mentally ill...or even....never have them talk to me again...Yes, I'd rather have ALL of that, than the guilt that comes from not "doing something", when I KNOW I should.
I can not count the times when I have obeyed that "push" to say something or do something, to fix a situation...and everything works out....oh that FEELING. It's euphoric...and I feel so blessed, to have been allowed to be a part of truly changing someone's life. It's ....well...SPIRITUAL! (of course!)
Maybe that does make me crazy. Maybe I have the personality disorder! ...because in the end, what people think of me or my actions, isn't the most important thing in my life. What "my God" thinks of me, is far more important. It's doing, what I perceive to be "the right thing", that is most important to me. Maybe that makes me selfish? LOL
Because most people don't understand what an introvert actually is, or they confuse introversion with someone who is just shy or lacking in social skills.
I'm an introvert too BTW. I often just prefer my own company to the company of others and prefer to be in my own world than the world outside (hence that it's 9:18pm when most people my age are out partying and I'm sat at home).
Same here. People can't understand that I want to be left alone sometimes.
Well if you live in America, being an introvert is tough. America is a super extroverted country (our culture), in general. Most people in the US are extroverts. I remember one time having lunch on my own during work , (I was so happy all by myself gathering my thoughts and all), then comes a stranger wanting to sit and keep me company. I currently live in Europe and NO ONE would do that, that is just insane.
Anyway, I honestly don't think ANY person actually thinks that introverted means being cowardly or weak, at least not anyone that I know of!!!
I don't care what "most people" think of me. This is who I am, if someone doesn't like it then leave me alone. Problem solved.
Because mass media and society in general in America is (not surprisingly) dominated by extroverts. The perception is that extroverts are "strong" and "leaders." There's also a lack of information about what actually entails being introverted and most people like introversion really means shyness and awkwardness.
I am not shy. I'm an introvert, they're two different personality traits. Why is this so hard for people to understand?
Reading Ops post he really isn't a introvert ;just a quiet guy by choice from experience, He can join group conversations when he chooses much different from introvert who may try but often fails. As to why introverts are picked on by bullies ;that is because maybe 1-10 will react back by putting up a fight and bullies know it. I am 66 and that has never changed really.
As an introvert/loner, I tend to view people who are dependent upon interaction with others to be "weak."
Yes, I tend to equate "weakness" with "dependence" and "strength" with "independence," and this might be different from the kind of strength/weakness the OP is talking about. He seems to be mostly talking about physical strength, and the male pecking order thing. As a female, I've never dealt with anyone wanting to or trying to beat me up, even in childhood. So I never think of "strength" or "weakness" in terms of who can beat up whom.
But my (admittedly biased) opinion is that when a person can't do things alone--solve a problem, complete a task, work on a project, sit alone in a restaurant, go on a trip, be home alone--that this is a weakness. As an introvert, I can, and prefer to, do all those things on my own. I can also do them with other people, though it's not my preference, and depending on the activity and the people involved, I'm bound to get annoyed and/or drained.
I just see all this needing of other people, and requiring other people to meet one's needs, as weakness.
I feel the same way. I will base my happiness on other people. I make myself happy.
I am not shy. I'm an introvert, they're two different personality traits. Why is this so hard for people to understand?
Agreed. This is exactly what I've been trying to point out; entirely without success. Oh well, this IS the United States of America after all -- a country where speaking skills are valued, emphasized and taught, but good listening skills are completely ignored and even punished.
In the vernacular of the Citizens Band (CB) craze of the 1980's we are now a nation of Alligators -- big mouths, no ears.
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. America is a super extroverted country (our culture), in general. Most people in the US are extroverts. I remember one time having lunch on my own during work , (I was so happy all by myself gathering my thoughts and all
), then comes a stranger wanting to sit and keep me company
. I currently live in Europe and NO ONE would do that, that is just insane. 
