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Old 05-27-2014, 06:40 AM
 
993 posts, read 1,556,417 times
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A feeling of hopelessness coupled with a feeling of futility. The hopelessness is obviously regarding one's own situation. And the futility is resigning oneself to the notion that continuing to live is just not worth it when weighed against the negatives of his or her life.

Sorry about your son. I've lost friends to suicide, and have myself "been there." It's a horror for everyone involved - the victim, and his or her close friends and relatives.
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Old 05-27-2014, 10:02 AM
 
Location: Ontario
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I don't know. If you're gonna give up on life then fair enough, but why do people always go right to killing themselves? Why not just become a smack addict or something? Might as well have some fun if you're gonna throw in the towel.
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Old 05-27-2014, 10:57 AM
 
Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida
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The only sense I can make of it is that life is too excruciatingly painful that they cannot stand another second on earth.
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Old 05-27-2014, 12:35 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 303Guy View Post
The question arises from my own son's suicide. Not all suicides are driven by the same force I should think. Some suffer depression, some suffer extreme anxiety. But is there a common driving force or are there several unrelated or perhaps related driving forces?

It has always struck me as extreme when someone jumps of a high building. What anguish did they suffer to make them take that step? Why not just take an easy and painless measure? Would someone choose to end their life simply because life sucks and they see no hope for improvement? I'm still trying to understand the enormity of it. I think I understand my son's case but not what triggered it at the critical time (not fully anyway).
Life is really hard. Suicide is a permanent solution to problems that seem to get worse. I used to think about it a lot when I was younger. My faith prohibits me from contemplating it. My life is in such as mess right now. I just keep hoping that I will look back on this later and it will make me more thankful for what I have. I guess the answer to your question is a lack of hope.
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Old 05-27-2014, 01:07 PM
 
Location: East Bay, San Francisco Bay Area
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People that commit suicide have lost all hope that their situation will ever get better.
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Old 05-27-2014, 01:09 PM
 
Location: Oceania
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I had a family member who had been battling cancer and other maladies incurred during the Vietnam war. He was in constant pain and was drinking morphine syrup to keep it at bay. He shot himself in the head one morning.

Everyone was shocked and it took me a few years to come to grips with it but in the end I figure if someone gets to the point they are tired of living and want to end it there should be some way they can. Especially in the case I am speaking of.
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Old 05-27-2014, 01:28 PM
 
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The pain outweighs the ability or willingness to cope.

I have been diagnosed with "suicidal ideation" which means I believed suicide would solve all my problems.

Well, it would've...but it would've caused a bunch more for those I left behind so it remained a 'fantasy'.

If I didn't have kids myself, and thought no one would be affected by my actions......different story.

The world can be very ugly and some people just want to get off.

It's more common than we all think. A lot of single car accidents are suicides.

Bless you and yours. The death of a child is the worst thing that can happen to a parent. I wish you peace and the ability to understand he was not rejecting you, but this ugly world.
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Old 05-27-2014, 04:39 PM
 
Location: San Diego, CA
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I think it is because things are unbearable and the person feels that there is absolutely no hope of things getting better. Even if these feelings are temporary, they can be intense.

To the OP, I am sorry to read your post.
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Old 05-27-2014, 05:10 PM
 
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Hopelessness, yes. Clinical depression, yes.

I lost my daughter last year. I have gone through all the stages. Interestingly, acceptance came first but it was a false comfort. Now I am angry. I have bouts of bargaining. I circle back to disbelief regularly and depression is a carnival tent overarching all of it.

Who can ever understand the why? The people who loved her are forever changed. I wonder sometimes if she has regrets.

For me, the life I have left seems very long and bleak. But that is no way to live. In her last, loving note to me she seemed to understand the terrible effect her choice would have on her loved ones but she still chose it, so I have to respect that. Her last desperate hope was that I would be ok so I have to be.
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Old 05-27-2014, 05:48 PM
 
Location: Kansas
25,780 posts, read 21,924,440 times
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I don't think anyone can ever really know what ultimately drives a person to commit suicide. My thought about it is that is often seemed to be almost "glorified" or "noble" anymore and maybe even an acceptable choice. You keep hearing the statistics about people committing suicide which I don't think helps someone who might be considering it. I knew someone whose daughter committed suicide right after graduation from high school. She committed it with a friend (female) and they left a note that there life had been so great that they wanted to end it at that point. I felt so sorry for that woman as you could see the pain and that every moment she just seemed to be holding herself up with it taking so much effort to even take the next breath. Sadly I just think it is becoming an "answer" or "choice" in today's society. OP, I am sorry for your loss and am hoping that you can find some peace that what happened just happened and that you'll never really know what pushed your son that far.
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