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- Constant lying, with just about anything! No matter big or small
- Stealing, especially money.. and when caught, turns the story around and NEVER admits. Instead, acts like the victim
- Gets overly angry, even with the smallest issues. As a couple, he always avoided those "talks" and gets really angry even when I'm not even trying to argue
- Once he is angry, he can completely isolate himself and not return any calls no matter the situation or even see me for that matter.
I spent about 10 years- the last three not willingly- with someone just like that. Turns out he was sociopathic and had malignant narcissistic personality disorder.
Those were the craziest years of my life.
He was the most charming man when he wanted to be but I found he could turn it off like a light switch and get very nasty.
He would disappear at the least slight and I never understood what I did. He would actually go to a hotel somewhere and isolate himself for days! I didn't know if he was dead or alive and towards the end I was hoping for the former!
Lied about everything- not to just get out of things but to create himself as something he wasn't.
He would never sit down and talk things out. It was his way or the highway.
Couldn't keep friends. He would just suddenly feel slighted over the smallest thing and cut them off, including relatives.
He was a user and abuser.
My head spun for years and there was nothing I could do to make him a happy person.
Get out now. Don't waste your life. I regret that I worked so hard on a relationship that was doomed from the start.
Do some research on narcissistic personality disorder. Sure sounds like that is what he has. Not curable. Just run fast and as far away as you can.
This posting wins the prize for the most informative and realistic description of what life is truly like being in a relationship with anyone who is bipolar (or worse); one who blames the rest of the world for his/her issues; and refuses to take ownership of the condition and get professional help.
- Constant lying, with just about anything! No matter big or small
- Stealing, especially money.. and when caught, turns the story around and NEVER admits. Instead, acts like the victim
- Gets overly angry, even with the smallest issues. As a couple, he always avoided those "talks" and gets really angry even when I'm not even trying to argue
- Once he is angry, he can completely isolate himself and not return any calls no matter the situation or even see me for that matter.
I spent about 10 years- the last three not willingly- with someone just like that. Turns out he was sociopathic and had malignant narcissistic personality disorder.
Those were the craziest years of my life.
He was the most charming man when he wanted to be but I found he could turn it off like a light switch and get very nasty.
He would disappear at the least slight and I never understood what I did. He would actually go to a hotel somewhere and isolate himself for days! I didn't know if he was dead or alive and towards the end I was hoping for the former!
Lied about everything- not to just get out of things but to create himself as something he wasn't.
He would never sit down and talk things out. It was his way or the highway.
Couldn't keep friends. He would just suddenly feel slighted over the smallest thing and cut them off, including relatives.
He was a user and abuser.
My head spun for years and there was nothing I could do to make him a happy person.
Get out now. Don't waste your life. I regret that I worked so hard on a relationship that was doomed from the start.
Do some research on narcissistic personality disorder. Sure sounds like that is what he has. Not curable. Just run fast and as far away as you can.
They don't turn normal- ever. I thought I loved that man, too but what he was when he was charming wasn't him. He was a very smart person, had tons of potential, could be the sweetest when he wanted something. That was the man I loved but that was all an act. He always had an ulterior motive when he was nice. I tried and tried and did all I could to make him happy but he was a miserable bas*ard and nothing and no one could change that.
Make yourself happy and don't worry about him. They are users and he will just move on to the next person to use. Sad to say, we mean nothing to these monsters. Hard to wrap your head around it because being empty and having no empathy and seeing people as only something to get use out of is so beyond our realm of thinking. I will never understand it but I accept it now.
My sympathies goes out to you all. I just want to say I'm under the impression that not all sociopaths are monsters. Hitler and Stalin were two of the most notable monsters.
I have Bipolar and I have none of those symptoms, they really have nothing to do with Bipolar. Rapid speech, can't stay still, don't sleep, moods swings, highs followed by depression. Sounds as if your BF is just a jerk.
+1. I am both bipolar and a psychologist. The BF isn't bipolar, or at least not just bipolar. He sounds like he has other personality issues. I have difficulty with mood swings and insomnia R/T the disorder, but I'm not mean or disrespectful to others, nor are many other bipolar people. Mental illness is not an excuse to misbehave. I suggest you move on.
My sympathies goes out to you all. I just want to say I'm under the impression that not all sociopaths are monsters. Hitler and Stalin were two of the most notable monsters.
There are many with NPD and even sociopaths that are functional in society. They may have been the boss that was ruthless, the co-worker that stabbed anyone and everyone in the back to move up, strange teachers, etc. Thank God we don't have to be in close relationships with these people and can make changes to get away from them. Even though they function at work and daily activities, their social and private lives are usually a mess.
I have no degree but I have done so much research on this I could probably get one. LOL Trust me, this was an education I never asked for.
+1. I am both bipolar and a psychologist. The BF isn't bipolar, or at least not just bipolar. He sounds like he has other personality issues. I have difficulty with mood swings and insomnia R/T the disorder, but I'm not mean or disrespectful to others, nor are many other bipolar people. Mental illness is not an excuse to misbehave. I suggest you move on.
^^ This. I have dated someone with bi polar disorder before and it was a very long and serious relationship. She was clinically diagnosed with bi-polar disorder and actively seeking help. During that time I had the opportunity to learn more about the disorderand how it effects someone. Your BF does not have bi-polar disorder. He may have some other disorder and I thinks he's just genuinely a selfish/jerkish individual. All those factors are what's causing him to act that way towards you. Bi-polar disorder commonly has symptoms described by Masika, I pretty much dealt with all of those when I was with my ex.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Masika
I have Bipolar and I have none of those symptoms, they really have nothing to do with Bipolar. Rapid speech, can't stay still, don't sleep, moods swings, highs followed by depression. Sounds as if your BF is just a jerk.
The behaviors you describe are NOT associated with Bipolar Disorder. Bipolar is a mood disorder characterized by severe mood swings and drastic changes in energy level and enthusiasm. For a few days (or months!), you would expect him to have a ton of energy and a million ideas, he's gonna write a novel, he's gonna build a house, he's gonna clean the house three times today, he's gonna start a business -- all the time talking a mile a minute and getting by on an hour of sleep every night. That's mania. Then he crashes, sleeps around the clock, gains or loses 30 pounds, talks suicide, cares about nothing, misses or quits work, thinks everything is stupid and pointless. That's depression. He might have normal, in-between periods, but maybe not. He might be all extremes. At either extreme he might also be seriously out of touch with reality, talking to angels, telling people he is Buddha, thinking people are out to get him, that kind of thing.
You, on the other hand, are dealing with someone who is dramatic and very weak on right and wrong. He might have Borderline personality he might just be a sociopath. Run for your life!
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I love him but ****..this is scary accurate. I'll be sure to run 
