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Why is Asperger's being referred to as a disorder? It's a condition, not a disorder. It describes how we are and understanding that one has the condition helps us to cope with it and learn to deal with it. It does cause difficulties sometimes. It would have been a great survival condition in neolithic times but is more of a hindrance in modern times. Although, a lot of famous people are thought to have Asperger's.
I agree with you that Asperger's is my "condition" rather than my "disorder", but in all fairness, on my official diagnosis papers from the psychologist, it says "Asperger Disorder". Not sure why. I guess that's what the DSM called it, at least at the time. There has since been a revision, and Asperger's is now under the umbrella of "autism spectrum disorders". Whatever.
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Originally Posted by 303Guy
Scratch discipline! Well, not completely - boundaries are essential. Never use anger and punishment! Aspie kids respond well to love, firmness and light-heartedness. They do have a sense of humour and they can learn nuances. Some lean more towards 'autism' while others lean toward neuro-typical.
Man, ain't THAT the truth. I can't explain what it's like, going for 20 years not being able to tell my parents how I really felt about [whatever] because I knew that they were just going to blow up instead of talking things out with me. When I finally set my life to where they had nothing left that they could take away from me if I did something they didn't like, I unleashed it all. It all came out in a long letter that I typed up and gave them. It took a year for them to get over it but I think our relationship is far better than it ever was before.
I have a sense of humor... sometimes too much of one... I laugh too much at my own jokes. That's why I'd make a terrible comedian. But at the same time I'm usually the last one to get someone else's joke. I've learned some nuances in my 34 years but I still think I miss the majority of them.
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Originally Posted by 303Guy
I know another young kid with Asperger's and if an adult were to meet him they would never guess it. He is bright and can hold an adult conversation. That's what being an Aspie means. He can socialize with adults but not so much his peers. But he is a kid and does do kid stuff although he prefers science kid stuff.
That's me. Most times I tell people I have Asperger's and they say they wouldn't have guessed. (Only people who figure it out quickly are people who understand the condition because they've been educated as to what it's like, and other Aspies.) When I was a kid, I used to hang with the adults or the much younger kids. With the adults, I was more like a peer. With the younger kids, I was more like an older brother or parent figure who kept them entertained and prevented them from hurting themselves. I never did well with people my age. I still don't.
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Originally Posted by 303Guy
It turns out that my mother was autistic - not severely autistic though. We just thought of her as being 'odd'. And she was odd. Stubborn as a mule! Now had we known why she was the way she was it would surely have made life easier for all of us. She was oblivious to all of this.
My dad's the autistic one. He has Asperger's too, though he isn't diagnosed. Why is he not diagnosed? Because he, too, is "stubborn as a mule". The way we think is often quite similar. I think that's why we butted heads so frequently in my younger years. But, it does make sense that he's the autistic one. Asperger's tends to pass from males to male offspring.
My gripe is its use an excuse. Failing in school, live with your parents, can't find a job, etc then people are quick to rush to the "oh you sound like you have Aspergers! ". We aren't allowed to say some kids aren't as smart as others. Everyone gets a medal. If they aren't good at something then something MUST be wrong! Take them to the doctors, and keep going til one gives the diagnoses you want.
My gripe is its use an excuse. Failing in school, live with your parents, can't find a job, etc then people are quick to rush to the "oh you sound like you have Aspergers! ". We aren't allowed to say some kids aren't as smart as others. Everyone gets a medal. If they aren't good at something then something MUST be wrong! Take them to the doctors, and keep going til one gives the diagnoses you want.
I'm pretty sure there are people who do use it as an excuse but do you know how many use it as an excuse? It's hard to determine hardcore facts here when there's not really a baseline to even determine whether or not someone has asperger's. All we have here are opinions.
Autism is a SPECTRUM. It ranges from very mild to very severe but the brain structure behind it is consistent. Most people with autism are not the stereotypical mutes rocking in a corner all day. Most have at least normal intellect and can function to a fair degree.
Well, maybe it's not so much an excuse as an explanation. There is the co-morbidity factor which may be troubling people who may have Aspergers. The kid I mentioned above could quite possibly have grown up happy and become a successful computer geek. But he didn't.
It's quite true that all we have here are opinions (and our thoughts and experiences). I would like to here more input from Aspies. Oh, the term Aspie is a light hearted 'badge' used by Aspies. It's just easier to say than 'Asperger's Syndrome person'.
I do not accept that I have a disorder. I have a condition that makes me a little different to most. I am not handicapped, I can do most stuff others can do and sometimes even better than most. I have a few unique skills but I have a few deficiencies too. I used to feel inadequate and that there was something wrong with me but when I came to realise I was different and that I have Asperger's I stopped thinking of myself as being somehow inadequate but rather just someone with some special qualities and some inadequacies. I do have emotional instability issues and I do suffer anxiety and I don't have many friends and those that I do have are somewhat older than me or younger. Mostly younger (there are more younger folks than older). I also get on well with youngsters for some reason. Uncle figure maybe? Or mentor? Maybe I have an extraordinary patience with younger people. Whatever it is, I am what I am. At the moment I am slow and absent minded at work. Being slow could make me feel inadequate and losing it or whatever but it doesn't. Why? Because I know why I am slow and absent minded. I am suffering from depression (the absent mindedness) which will improve and I have just lost my son (being slow - grieving) which will get better too. Likewise with knowing and understanding one has Asperger's. There is something going on. It's not the persons fault so they can stop beating themselves up over it and start moving forward. Those are my thoughts.
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Autism is a SPECTRUM. It ranges from very mild to very severe but the brain structure behind it is consistent. Most people with autism are not the stereotypical mutes rocking in a corner all day. Most have at least normal intellect and can function to a fair degree.
Exactly. They (we) can function very well most times.
I have Asperger's. I don't use it as a crutch or an excuse.
I know some parents are quite happy to get an ASD diagnosis because they think it means tons of individual attention at school and a free pass from getting in trouble for misbehaving for their special little snowflake.
I do see it being overused, like how OCD is thrown around to describe anyone who double checks to make sure the light is off, while the actual disorder can be debilitating.
I'm glad Asperger's didn't "exist" when I was a kid. I would have been diagnosed, and likely have used that as an excuse to never try to build relationships or get a job. I long-ago gave up on trying to date, but have a handful of friends, a decent job, car, apartment. Most people don't know, and I prefer it that way. It's just a part of me that makes me extra quirky.
I have Asperger's. I don't use it as a crutch or an excuse.
I know some parents are quite happy to get an ASD diagnosis because they think it means tons of individual attention at school and a free pass from getting in trouble for misbehaving for their special little snowflake.
That's exactly what happens. Parents doctor shop until one diagnoses an ASD or ADHD disorder. Then by state mandate they must receive extra time on standardized tests, projects, SATs, etc. They also get special one on one attention from teachers. Another perk is the misbehavior being blamed on it. The whole "well the doctor said...." Then the school is at risk for being sued because they suspended the "autistic kiid".
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In my personal experience of working with a mix of autistic adolescents in a residential setting, they don't respond well to heavy-handed discipline. In fact they usually escalate and can hold out for hours or days if punishment is all you do.
A little light discipline is appropriate, but it needs to be mixed with calming talk, preferably somewhat rhythmic. The higher the level of functioning, of course, the more they benefit from reasoning.
So no, their problems don't come from a lack of discipline.
I can't remember where I read that the US takes the lead in turning everything into some kind of pathology.
Oh god yes,and can't leave out all the 'bi-polars' too!
To believe all the quacks in the mental-health field.... which is nothing but total quackery,every person alive has some mental disorder that they need medicating for!
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