The allure of 'being bad' (mentally, attracted, emotion, adult)

[Trimac20]

When you're a teenager, it seems it's cool to be 'bad', a rebel, break the rules.etc...As a teen, I never really related to that attitude. I never wanted to cause mischief just because...and I think a lot, maybe most teens didn't. But it seems like many adults seem to believe that many teenagers or even other adults get kicks out of breaking the rules. Do you get this impression too? I mean it didn't mean I was a 'goody two shoes', I still drank, smoked pot.etc, but I didn't even consider those things that 'wrong' or bad. Of course you can go overboard, but what is wrong with being 'good' anyway and why is there this idea that so many people are so attracted to the 'forbidden fruit?' Maybe it's because they see the rules as BS, and breaking rules makes you liberated and devil-may-care?

[Nickchick]

I never did either and I don't know. when I break any kind of rule, I believe it is warranted.
I think it's funny though because it seems like a lot of the time teenagers have more class than adults. sure teens like to be rebellious and all that esp the teens of today but adults not only get mean to teenagers but they are rude to other adults as well. this is especially true with women and those in big business. I guess once the hormones really kick in, that's when they all lose it.

[mordant]

I think teens are so monumentally self-absorbed that they just have no empathy for the feelings of others. It doesn't occur to them to think about how something coming out of their mouth or something they do or fail to do might impact someone else's emotional landscape. I wonder sometimes if the way a small baby hasn't figured out that they are physically separate from the rest of the world, a teen does not think the rest of the world has needs, desires, opinions or feelings -- all of those things belong exclusively to the teen.

I think this because if I'm honest, that's about the headspace I was in as a teen, despite that I was, relatively speaking, quite a compliant and easy child.

I realize there are exceptions that prove the rule, and personality variations that make it worse or better, but until most people get to their mid twenties or so they are pretty lacking in the empathy and impulse control departments as well as in the ability to connect actions with consequences and this makes them seem evil. The truth, usually, is they are actually that self-absorbed, impulsive and oblivious to others.

[Trimac20]

Originally Posted by mordant

I think teens are so monumentally self-absorbed that they just have no empathy for the feelings of others. It doesn't occur to them to think about how something coming out of their mouth or something they do or fail to do might impact someone else's emotional landscape. I wonder sometimes if the way a small baby hasn't figured out that they are physically separate from the rest of the world, a teen does not think the rest of the world has needs, desires, opinions or feelings -- all of those things belong exclusively to the teen.

I think this because if I'm honest, that's about the headspace I was in as a teen, despite that I was, relatively speaking, quite a compliant and easy child.

I realize there are exceptions that prove the rule, and personality variations that make it worse or better, but until most people get to their mid twenties or so they are pretty lacking in the empathy and impulse control departments as well as in the ability to connect actions with consequences and this makes them seem evil. The truth, usually, is they are actually that self-absorbed, impulsive and oblivious to others.

Yes, that's what they say. That's why some people are upset that the mandatory age to be convicted of a crime as an adult is below 18 in some states of the US, for instance. I think many teens are the exception, but I do remember as a teen I felt emotions more strongly and got blindly angry; in fact sometimes disturbingly so. Some teens also like to bully people/play cruel jokes on them. Unfortunately a few people never grow out of this phase.

[gabaghoul]

Originally Posted by Trimac20

When you're a teenager, it seems it's cool to be 'bad', a rebel, break the rules.etc...As a teen, I never really related to that attitude. I never wanted to cause mischief just because...and I think a lot, maybe most teens didn't. But it seems like many adults seem to believe that many teenagers or even other adults get kicks out of breaking the rules. Do you get this impression too? I mean it didn't mean I was a 'goody two shoes', I still drank, smoked pot.etc, but I didn't even consider those things that 'wrong' or bad. Of course you can go overboard, but what is wrong with being 'good' anyway and why is there this idea that so many people are so attracted to the 'forbidden fruit?' Maybe it's because they see the rules as BS, and breaking rules makes you liberated and devil-may-care?

Maybe it's easier being bad than good. Plus, maybe it has to do something with way the media portrays bad people. Maybe good people want to be that bad person who doesn't follow the rules but are too afraid or too wise to be bad.

[oberon_1]

Michael Jackson - Bad - YouTube

[Weatherfan2]

I was a rebel teenager not because I wanted to be "bad" but because I was creating my own identity and freedom against the silly rules and conditions of society as I saw them. What most bores think is "Bad" is just another example of silly man made societal constructs. I never harmed anybody.