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Despite being a very shy person, I actually find public speaking less intimidating than making small talk. I guess I'm in the minority among introverts.
Usually with public speaking, there is a purpose to it. With small talk, there's really no purpose. I tend to have a hard time with social interaction that do not involve any sort of "purpose" so I guess that could be an explanation.
Although when I do go on stage (to play music) a beer does help me to relax a bit.
In general though, small talk is easy, you only have a captive audience of 1 or 2 people. You find something in common (even if you're not interested in the topic) and go at it. If you go out more, and practice you'll get more comfortable with it.
With a large group you have to let your words sink into tens if not hundreds of people. Usually its something planned and difficult that you need to inform or teach the group about. Usually these situations are rare, and you can't practice for it. Sometimes you have to project your voice and sometimes there's equipment failure. Though once you're in a zone, it can be tolerable.
I would add and make a distinction between performance, speaking and small talk though. Performances are fun and you want to be the center of attention, public speaking sometimes gets forced upon us, and small talk (for me) isn't nerve racking as it is (in some cases) like pulling teeth.
When you make small talk there is a chance that you have a lot in common, or at the very least they are a good conversationalist; is interested in you or you, them. With public speaking, that is harder to accomplish.
I have a fear of public speaking, so that would be my answer. Small talk can be fun, I'm random when it comes to that stuff. I don't like staying on one subject very long.
how could you possibly draw that conclusion based on a small paragraph? i have issues with both of those and i don't have aspergers
If a person makes a remark that MIGHT be recognized as a symptom of a disorder, and regards that issue acutely enough to be inspired to create a thread about it, it is not unreasonable to suggest that the person MIGHT suffer from that disorder.
People who recognize themselves as Aspergers and who are familiar with the social characteristics of Aspergers, are often acutely aware of their discomfort while being the subject of attention, whether there is one person present, or a whole roomful.
Based on a small paragraph, I'm also going to suggest that you MIGHT not be Aspergers, since you don't know enough about that topic to be aware of the social dynamics experienced by Aspergers. Actually, "small talk" is anathema to Aspergers, who would be more inclined to lock onto a narrow subject and discuss it to death.
I was recently invited to a neighborhood Holiday Party. Like most streets in the urban Northeast, no one really knows the neighbors here- other than a few waves or forced smiles. So it was basically like being thrown into small talk hell. I found the forced conversations boring, tedious, difficult and exasperating. In fact I found it one of the most challenging activities I had done all year.
I heard that public speaking is the average person's greatest fear. I do public speaking and think it is way easier than making small talk with strangers. What do you think is harder?
I find them both easy. Public speaking has become considerably more difficult since my brain tumor resection 3.5 years ago, but I still enjoy it. I used to be able to speak almost completely unrehearsed. Making small talk with strangers is also easy, especially if they are complete strangers or foreigners. One of my worst "fears" in this aspect of life is conversations with those whom I once had a relatively close relationship with (high school teachers and former classmates are one example) yet have not seen for several years. Even when I was still in college and not ashamed of my present situation, it was very difficult, and I went (and still go to) great lengths to avoid such contacts.
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