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I remember, as a teen, being told by parents that I could not take any stress. I remember telling them back then that if I could tolerate stress so well, I'd simply not listen to them anymore and bear the stress and hardship of any ensuing punishment for my actions (i.e. getting grounded, being kicked out, etc.)
Over the years, I've developed a stronger and stronger tolerance for stress and hardships. The main benefit I've derived from this is mostly monetary savings. For example, I still drive my 15 year old car even though it doesn't look that great but still gets good gas mileage and doesn't cost much to maintain (yet). Or I've rented some less than ideal places (like a room in someone else's house) to save money even though I could afford better. I also keep the thermostat on my AC in the low 80s to save on electricity and the heat in the mid 60s in the winter.
However, my increasing resilience for stress seems to have made me lazier in a way. Instead of changing a less than ideal circumstance, I'll often just tolerate it until it becomes utterly unbearable. Is this a bad sign?
I see your post more about saving money, being frugal rather than having to do with stress and hardship especially the hardship part. We are frugal and living much like you are as a family and we don't find it stressful, a hardship or in any way lazy. Are you trying to prove something to your parents? If so, I would say that might be an issue.
I remember, as a teen, being told by parents that I could not take any stress. I remember telling them back then that if I could tolerate stress so well, I'd simply not listen to them anymore and bear the stress and hardship of any ensuing punishment for my actions (i.e. getting grounded, being kicked out, etc.)
Over the years, I've developed a stronger and stronger tolerance for stress and hardships. The main benefit I've derived from this is mostly monetary savings. For example, I still drive my 15 year old car even though it doesn't look that great but still gets good gas mileage and doesn't cost much to maintain (yet). Or I've rented some less than ideal places (like a room in someone else's house) to save money even though I could afford better. I also keep the thermostat on my AC in the low 80s to save on electricity and the heat in the mid 60s in the winter.
However, my increasing resilience for stress seems to have made me lazier in a way. Instead of changing a less than ideal circumstance, I'll often just tolerate it until it becomes utterly unbearable. Is this a bad sign?
It just means you haven't hit your tolerance level to want to change it.
If it works for you, then go with it. When it becomes uncomfortable or unworkable, you will want to change it. In the meantime, dont worry.
It just means you haven't hit your tolerance level to want to change it.
If it works for you, then go with it. When it becomes uncomfortable or unworkable, you will want to change it. In the meantime, dont worry.
If it becomes unsafe, of course, get rid of it.
When I was a teen, often I would do whatever I wanted and just endure the consequences like being scolded, grounded, or even worse because I developed an unusually high tolerance for those things and they were no longer effective deterrants.
I don't go around purposely harming others but for me, being yelled at, shamed, etc for breaking unwritten rules is no deterrent for getting things my way.. (Getting thrown in jail or fined is a different story.)
FYI, I think this might me known as stoicism.
Last edited by ragnarkar; 08-09-2014 at 09:30 PM..
When I was a teen, often I would do whatever I wanted and just endure the consequences like being scolded, grounded, or even worse because I developed an unusually high tolerance for those things and they were no longer effective deterrants.
I don't go around purposely harming others but for me, being yelled at, shamed, etc for breaking unwritten rules is no deterrent for getting things my way.. (Getting thrown in jail or fined is a different story.)
FYI, I think this might me known as stoicism.
Well here's a thought -
if its not working for you anymore - its time to change it. So now you are free to be a different person. You don't have to use the old coping techniques because you are now free to be who you want to be. You still have baggage, but you can slowly begin to let it go because its not needed anymore.
I remember, as a teen, being told by parents that I could not take any stress. I remember telling them back then that if I could tolerate stress so well, I'd simply not listen to them anymore and bear the stress and hardship of any ensuing punishment for my actions (i.e. getting grounded, being kicked out, etc.)
Over the years, I've developed a stronger and stronger tolerance for stress and hardships. The main benefit I've derived from this is mostly monetary savings. For example, I still drive my 15 year old car even though it doesn't look that great but still gets good gas mileage and doesn't cost much to maintain (yet). Or I've rented some less than ideal places (like a room in someone else's house) to save money even though I could afford better. I also keep the thermostat on my AC in the low 80s to save on electricity and the heat in the mid 60s in the winter.
However, my increasing resilience for stress seems to have made me lazier in a way. Instead of changing a less than ideal circumstance, I'll often just tolerate it until it becomes utterly unbearable. Is this a bad sign?
You may be experiencing a sense of complacency.
Resilience usually implies one is striving to better his/her situation.
If anything, sounds like you may feel a bit burnt out, and not necessarily you are lazy. Could be related to feelings of feelings of stuckness, like you're going through the motions of life, and not really living in the present. Sometimes people numb out when faced with numerous adversities and their sense of well-being is stretched out too thin. Self-care in these circumstances is a much needed Rx, a personal vaca of any sort, 101.
How do you take action before another stressor really hits you hard? I been also thinking about this more lately
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