Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
This IS the Psychology forum. People in need of treatment are likely to gravitate here. It's not necessarily a comment on the state of the whole world.
This IS the Psychology forum. People in need of treatment are likely to gravitate here. It's not necessarily a comment on the state of the whole world.
This thread began its life on the Relationships board. Which...I never visit anymore because I was tired of being insulted (along with my own gender) and then any time I spoke in my own defense, even in the most civil tones and language I could muster, getting my posts snipped or removed. I didn't like being told things like how I needed to understand and accept my husband looking at porn and other women, but me having a male friend or going out to metal concerts without my husband was torture because he's insecure and afraid I might cheat. There was just a lot of people projecting their own problems onto everyone else's situation and every other topic. It never failed to get nasty in there. I am done giving Relationships a chance.
But now that this thread is here, I'd like to say that THIS:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Odo
Interesting theory, but I really don't think that it's the internet whiners who are accomplishing great things for society, despite their many inadequacies and insecurities. Then again, they don't really compete for women either-- they just compete for each other's attention and fuel for pointless arguments about which gender has it worse. I think as a general rule, someone who feels inadequate isn't going to succeed unless they know how to push themselves out of their inadequacy.
The real difference is that women are more likely to have financial independence so they don't end up pressured into relationships they would have otherwise written off, so men who could have relied on their superior paychecks to attract women now have to rely on qualities that they don't have. If you suck as a person, you can't rely on a woman's fear of being poor to help you get laid-- poor you.
So now that things are more 'equal', it follows that the amount of women who seek to be more assertive and enterprising is balanced out by men who are tired of having to actually do things and just want to be held and taken care of. Without the pressure to 'be a man', some men immediately gravitate towards the coddling that women were receiving when they were regarded on the same level as children.
This is because the positive aspects of gender equality have been emphasized without addressing the negatives, and the capitalist approach to medicine/therapy aggravates it-- there is money to be made in anti-depressants and therapists and such, so you're being encouraged to think you have issues.
But what this generation really longs for is a code, something that they can believe in and will give them a stronger sense of their identity. Mindless consumerism just isn't it. Patriotism is embarrassing. Conformity is shameful. Despair and helplessness are being broadcast directly into your home 24/7. And getting rid of your phone/internet will have a significant impact on your social life.
It's too easy to cut ourselves off, live behind computer screens, not associate with people who challenge our beliefs, find online echo chambers where it's more about making the other guy look bad, amuse ourselves with endless amounts of free entertainment and whine about all of the problems this kind of lifestyle causes.
...made some great points.
I really do think that many things shifted when our economy shifted to not only allow women to work, but almost require them to, for many households. Although with the economic downturn of recent years, I've met more and more people where the lady is the breadwinner and the fella lost his job and has yet to get another. In at least one instance, he is staying home with the kids and doing just fine with that responsibility.
As for the first of the bolded paragraphs above. I have made sure my husband had LOTS of life insurance for a long time (he's over a decade my senior.) The reason being that if something happens to him, I do not want to be forced to accept a man I don't really want to be with, just because my family needs the income to keep us afloat. My Mom endured some pretty awful stuff from my Dad and later husbands just because she'd been raised with the belief that a man was supposed to "take care of her" and she couldn't take care of herself, let alone herself plus kids.
I believe there are a huge population of people that need therapy or just life guidance because they were raised by children themselves.... Parents that had them too early while not having enough life experience or maturity to do the right thing all the time.
This is an ongoing problem and seems to be getting worse.
I believe there are a huge population of people that need therapy or just life guidance because they were raised by children themselves.... Parents that had them too early while not having enough life experience or maturity to do the right thing all the time.
This is an ongoing problem and seems to be getting worse.
Honestly, I'm not sure if the quantity of life experience (lack thereof) is the problem, or the quality. I can honestly say that some of the issues my Mom had that impaired her ability to parent would have been just as bad at any stage, it's how she grew up and the way she thinks.
I think that materialism, valuing stuff over money and both over people (yes I am a Suzy Orman fan) and being inherently self centered is a big issue. My kids were such a blessing and my strengths as a parent are because I realize that my own wants are not as important as their needs. Living selfishly was getting me nowhere. Living for them has really taken me far. Too many people don't try hard enough (in my opinion) to keep relationships working when they feel they could be "happier" giving up and running away. People have a really hard time compromising. Not only are people very focused on their own selfish perspective, they are not patient. When something they want doesn't immediately pan out the way they want it, they start talking about how things "always" or "never" are...instead of giving it all a chance to unfold.
In a society full of people who demand instant gratification, there will be much disappointment.
people raised with that haven't learned basic social skills.
Thank you. People stop having personal relationships with your C-O-M-P-U-T-E-R or hand-held device and get out and meet people face to face!! It can be enlightening.
parents need to be more involved with their kids overall
Yes parents. If you have children, it is no longer "all about you".
This generation is also the generation that has "killed" all of the heroes. I don't me "idols", I mean heroes. When I was young boys especially had heroes, besides their dads, to look up to. You know what I mean. We didn't rip everyone apart like you do now. Young children today have no heroes. And young people, stop blaming your parents and their generation for everything!! That is not going to solve ANYTHING. Besides, truth be told a good majority of todays older parents probably had no hand in making things as screwed up as they are today.
Because men play a higher stakes game than women. The most extreme 'losers' (in the non-pejorative sense of the word) are always men, just as are the most extreme winners. This is why screeching about "equality" is so disingenuous and unjust: feminists succumb to the apex fallacy by only focusing on the latter category and demanding "inclusion."
In modern society, this has grown even more extreme. Contrary to asinine leftist propaganda, the social order of the recent past was actually much more equitable than the one we're subjected to today. Traditional sexual mores, for example, acted as a sort of sexual socialism that allowed average men to have a stake in the system. Today, the sexual marketplace has been 'liberalized.' Like untrammeled capitalism, its inevitable trajectory is 'winner takes all.'
Of course, nobody cares about "loser" men, because they're losers. If they didn't want to be treated like dirt, they should have chosen their parents more carefully rather than be so poor, short, shy, etc.
people raised with that haven't learned basic social skills.
Thank you. People stop having personal relationships with your C-O-M-P-U-T-E-R or hand-held device and get out and meet people face to face!! It can be enlightening.
parents need to be more involved with their kids overall
Yes parents. If you have children, it is no longer "all about you".
This generation is also the generation that has "killed" all of the heroes. I don't me "idols", I mean heroes. When I was young boys especially had heroes, besides their dads, to look up to. You know what I mean. We didn't rip everyone apart like you do now. Young children today have no heroes. And young people, stop blaming your parents and their generation for everything!! That is not going to solve ANYTHING. Besides, truth be told a good majority of todays older parents probably had no hand in making things as screwed up as they are today.
Yup because as we all know the people under 30 are the ones on capitol hill drawing up all of our laws and policies and running America's biggest corporations.
Largely because males have been socially pressured by society to not talk about their internal problems.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
