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Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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Are there any women who never or rarely cry? My sister is kind of like that. She's not a cold person at all, but she's never been schmaltzy at all. I wonder if she's changed much at all, but I doubt it (she's living in another city raising a family, she's 24 now). In fact as a kid I reckon I probably cried more than her and I'm not a big crier. She thought romantic movies were kind of silly but wasn't really a tomboy. She was good looking and popular, too. My other sister was the opposite, probably takes after my mum, she used to cry a lot. Anyway that's part of the reason I felt so bad for her when she left home a few years ago and she let it all out. But that's another story.
As long as she wasn't heartless I wouldn't mind that...probably better than being TOO much of a blubberer, although a balance is probably best.
What about the opposite, men who cry a lot? I think men get teary far more often than you'd think but try to hold it back. During sad movies I often see males with watery eyes. They just don't full on sob unless a relative has died or something.
As a kid I didn't cry a great deal but it was kind of easy for me to as well. Like if I was told off, I'd cry. I seldom cried during sad movies, or if I got hurt. It was more emotional pain that caused me to cry.
For many years in my teens I don't think I cried at all. Then my depression got bad and for a time I got very emotional. I never used to cry at movies, but suddenly I was getting all choked up watching documentaries or movies. Toy Story 3 affected me quite a bit.
On average, I really have a good cry on average once or twice a year. The last time was when I thought I was going to die. I just totally broke down.
My best friend never cries and she's been that way since she was a child. I, on the other hand, am often holding back tears whenever I'm experiencing strong emotions. I don't cry over movies or tv shows (except for when Ianto from Torchwood died), but when I'm really sad or arguing intensely, I have to stop before my voice breaks.
Growing up, I was a total cry-baby and my mom never understood why. Of course, she rarely cries as well (I think I've seen her cry a grand sum total of twice in my 22 years of life). My father is the one who cries at the drop of a hat.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,060,466 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by silverbelles
My best friend never cries and she's been that way since she was a child. I, on the other hand, am often holding back tears whenever I'm experiencing strong emotions. I don't cry over movies or tv shows (except for when Ianto from Torchwood died), but when I'm really sad or arguing intensely, I have to stop before my voice breaks.
Growing up, I was a total cry-baby and my mom never understood why. Of course, she rarely cries as well (I think I've seen her cry a grand sum total of twice in my 22 years of life). My father is the one who cries at the drop of a hat.
Perfect example of how individual differences often outweigh generalizations.
Maybe your sister cries more than you think. When I need a good cry, I kind of do it alone. Just can't really let it out in public. (Public includes my immediate family in this case, and even my husband to some extent). Some of that might be going on.
Crying is healthy. Of course, this doesn't meant that you have to turn to tears at every obstacle in life, but it is healthy to let it all out, male or female alike.
I don't cry "a lot" but I have absolutely no problem doing so when I feel that it is truly warranted. Expressing your joy or sorrow can be a deeply meaningful and humanity-affirming experience.
I'm a woman, and I hardly ever cry. I think its because I've had pretty much every bad thing you can imagine happen to me, starting with abusive parents. For as far back as I can remember. I grew a tough exterior as a young child. If (when) I cried, my mother would say "I'll give you something to cry about." So, she would rip my skin open, using different things, beating me and saying horrible things. Things no child should ever be told by a parent.
Both my Mom and my Dad were "tough" and strong people. But every now and then both of my parents cried and they didn't seem to feel ashamed about it...Of course they didn't go around crying very often. It took a big event or something tragic to make them cry...They handled it okay if I cried. They were comforting. But after awhile they expected me to try to find some sort of a solution or resolution to my problem...If I was crying because my best friend "ditched me" for a new best friend we'd all talk about it for awhile...What was the best way to handle the situation? Maybe stay away from my friend for awhile and spend time with other friends. (Friends who didn't "kick me to the curb" etc.)...My parents said that this kind of "stuff" can happen with friends at times and there was no need to take it all "personally" unless I did something myself to upset my friend...Anyway it was okay to cry or "get mad" in my family. But after the emotions came out then it was time to try to find a solution to the problem if possible. (Versus pouting and sulking and just staying in a "bad mood" all day long.)
I'm an average crier. I don't cry over the average things the majority of women might cry over, but certain things will make me cry. A movie that I can truly envision being my own life, can make me cry in relation to the character and hoping it never actually happens to me. Being extremely misunderstood can frustrate me into crying. Losing someone I DEEPLY care about will also make me cry.
My friend on the other hand, will cry over any sappy movie, over the death of any person who's NAME she knew (including celebrities), over any time someone doesn't listen to her, and when she is generally overwhelmed with something she has no control over (like her health).
My husband isn't much of a crier, but I recently discovered he's a bigger crier over death than I am, mostly because being surrounded by a bunch of people crying, will trigger him to cry. This happens to me sometimes too... if I'm around the crying for at least a few hours.
Why the differences? I'm not sure. But I would assume crying is a form of expression when the person can't mentally and verbally articulate what they are experiencing. I'm an extremely mentally stable person, and it might be why I cry much less than others.
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