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I'm finally ready to stop lying to myself--I'm awful with this habit. I can remember doing this in the first grade! It's true that I have ADD and it's part of the profile but that doesn't mean I have to keep doing it. I do it so much I don't even know how to stop. Right now I'm just observing myself--things like taking a pile of clean and folded clothes in my bedroom and setting them on the bed rather than putting them away all the way to paying bills and taxes late. It feels like my life is constipated--like I can't move forward until these things get done. I've ruined several friendships over it and that's what I hate most. I told myself it was for other reasons b/c they never confronted me, but I know this is the real reason. Gosh I was down on my mom for hoarding, but this is like hoarding tasks.
So how to approach--make a list of things that are undone and work it thru, or just stop procrastinating now and pick up the things that are undone as well as I get to them? I honestly don't know where to start, though I did get the fridge cleaned out yesterday and the carport and yard picked up today, along with all the trash out and recyclables sorted out. I'm trying to make a list but that takes time. I need advice!
Guess I'd better get off--I use C-D for task avoidance, lol.
Yes, or maybe like. . . when you feel like it? Funny, never once have I felt like cleaning the fridge. Even toilets are more fun, and esp when I'm procrastinating on doing something else.
You're never going to "stop" being a procrastinator, that is the wrong goal to focus on. It is about accepting first of all that you are a procrastinator, that it is a symptom of your ADD, and forgive yourself for it. Then you can tackle it, not by willpower, but by experimenting on strategies to help you get things done...but the goal should never be to change your nature, because that will never happen. I know that feeling of "I should be able to do these everyday things without so much effort" because I see non-ADD friends do them easily, but the fact is I can't, that this is the way I was born, and I accept it and make the best of it.
Some things that have helped me include 1. My plan book, which I would die without now!
2. Using a timer. This is helpful especially when it is something I am procrastinating on because I don't know where to start or don't know how to do well (like hook up a new router). What I do is set the timer for 20 minutes or so and do whatever I want, play solitaire, go on forums, etc. Then I set the timer for 10 minutes and do something on my to-do list. It doesn't matter what and it doesn't matter if it's the same thing for the whole time. For something I really don't want to do (like my taxes!) I'll set the timer for 5 minutes only and do something related to getting the task done - it helps to write the task in steps: Instead of 1. "Do Taxes" I'll have "1. get receipts together".
When the 5 minutes are up, I then set it for another 20 to play again. It sounds silly, but starting is the hardest part for procrastinators, and knowing you only have to do it for 5 minutes makes it easier to start.
3. I recognize that I need to see things to remember them. If I put my mail in a pretty box on the table so my table doesn't look messy, I'll never open it or look through it - out of sight out of mind. So I accept that and just leave it out and don't worry about it. Everyone is different, you have to find what works for you but maybe these will give you a place to start.
There are also many, many apps and things available to help you stay organized and be reminded of things, even apps that reward you as you proceed toward the goals you set. There is a magazine for ADD called ADDitude, they have many free articles as well as forums online.
You are never going to stop being who you are, and it's fine. But it is up to you to be proactive in finding ways to succeed and take care of yourself and your life despite the ADD. You can do it, but you have to accept you will be out of your comfort zone many times and go through it anyway.
ocngirl, I like the idea of the timers--I do that for my ADD kids at school so maybe I should try it for myself. I guess I don't need to not be me--any progress is better than what I have now and that's for sure. I even have a little insight as to why I do this--it's hard to focus on the task at hand unless my back's up against a wall, but not all tasks that need to be done are like that. It's not like anyone comes in to check my housekeeping, but then I'm shy to have people over. Sometimes it seems like I just invite people sometimes so it will get cleaned up. This weekend I did it w/o any company coming lol.
I really think a lot of it is just setting an intention, like doing a diet, but if I lose sight of it I'm afraid I'll be right back where I was. I at least want to get all my back burner stuff done before I lose the intention but there is a lot. I guess I could get rid of some of that stuff, like sewing projects that never got finished--that sort of thing. Start over. I'll see. Anyone ever had a fantasy that the house would just burn down? LOL.
I'm a terrible procrastinator. Why do today what you can put off until....next month?
I have learned it is better to just get things done so I can enjoy other things. My job is more task-based than a 9-5. I can leave when I finish and still collect my salary. Being able to spend time on the lake or just get out and about motivates me. Sometimes I need to remember that, but knowing if I finish a job I can enjoy some free time helps me.
But one thing that kind of works is I say I'm gonna get something done that I have to do right then, and then promise to reward myself with what I want to do afterwards.
For example I'm listening to music and posting on city-data as a reward for having cleaned the bathroom right after I ate this evening. If I had started posting on city-data right after I ate, then I never would have done the bathroom and I'd feel guilty about having wasted the evening.
Instead I feel good about having gotten my work done and I don't have to feel guilty about indulging in pleasures afterwards.
I knew someone who procrastinated in asking someone to marry him! She slipped away, and after hearing the horror stories of her marriage, what a wicked witch she became, he plans on being a happy procrastinator until the day he dies!
I've learned, over the years, the value of being proactive, as I despise surprises or shocks to my forever fragile mental state! I don't even wait for car problems to develop, I'm always asking my mechanic: Car is running beautifully, but what should I look to having done next to avoid any future shocks?
Same with my house! I could have gotten another year or 2 on one of my toilets, but decided to get a new one, just to stay ahead of things!
Cooking! I always keep a stand-up freezer stocked with food I've cooked, and put into plastic containers with dates. Even my refrigerator freezer is full! And now? I could go 2 months without cooking!
My health? Now that's where the procrastinations come in! Big time!
My health? Now that's where the procrastinations come in! Big time!
And that can be the worst of all. I procrastinated on mine until something major came along to get my attention and now that's the one thing I do not procrastinate on!
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