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I think my response is very appropriate for a psychology board. I believe the fact that people are so easily moved to label people and dehumanize them is a very on-point aspect of human psychology.
Distinguishing groups of people (i.e., pro-lifer's v. pro-birthers) based on your perceptions or personal definitions is also an interesting aspect human psychology.
It is interesting that two people may believe in the same principle, but the label attributed to them is based on the "morality" you have artificially attributed to them based on their "duty to ensure a supportive society" which again is an arbitrary definition and moral judgment forced upon them.
Just sayin' psychology is fascinating!
Okay... I won't give them any labels. LOL.
But, I'll still think that people who are vehemently against abortion and vehemently against ensuring that we have a supportive society to help aid women who would not be able to have abortions if the laws were changed like those people who are vehemently against abortions would like are jerks.
Since I have a degree in it (and am working on another), I won't argue that psychology is indeed fascinating.
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It doesn't sound like you're actually close friends with this person, and I don't think you really know how it affected her. She may have been truly horrified once it sank in what she had done, and subsequently had to live the rest of her life with that emotional anguish. It could be entirely altruistic to want to spare other women from having to deal with that.
Many on this forum would be wise to remember the phrase "if you are twenty and a capitalist, you have no heart. If you are 40 and a socialist, you have no brain." This is not merely a political point but it is a reflection on how people change with age. Priorities change. You cannot expect someone to be the same person throughout their entire life.
You might party a lot in college but once you get married, you have new priorities to be concerned with. Your friends who are still single may wonder why you are not partying as much and may even feel resentment towards you for in a sense turning your back on them.
Beyond the grief and guilt she might feel, I sense as if some on here feel as if someone is a hypocrite unless they live their life the same way, believe the same things from beginning until end.
People who joined, left or gone back to a religion, job, spouse, partner, etc all have a story that involves a turning point where they change course and started on a new journey. Along the way, you can easily not recognize the person you used to be for better or for worse.
Just because people grow older and gain more life experiences, exposure to different beliefs and values does not make them a hypocrite or mean they have some ulterior motive.
I know in my experience and in the experience of others, you can go through for example your schooling process and fail many tests and not try very hard or even care very much about your education and future and then you are exposed to a new reality or a new way of looking at things and now you are a straight A student that studies hard and has a solid plan for the future.
In some minds of some, you should only have a straight path with very little deviations. If anyone watched the NFC Championship game on Sunday you would know that the Russell Wilson in the last five minutes was nothing like the Russell Wilson of the previous 55 minutes.
Some people do go through life and it is pretty straightforward with no bumps while others are pretty insular and close minded about new ideas and experiences changing the way they think and act. This cuts across all boundaries in life whether it be ethnic, religious, political or social. This group of people just cant wrap their heads around the fact that other people have a different experience that has led them down a path that is different than the one they were once on.
She doesn't need or want my respect but I would respect her more if she was honest about her experience. I think this perspective might hold more water than just a blanket "It's wrong" which BTW I don't think it is.
Maybe I missed something but how do you know she is not honest? There are plenty of reasons why is against abortion now, do you have anything to prove that she is a hypocrite or is lying?
Many on this forum would be wise to remember the phrase "if you are twenty and a capitalist, you have no heart. If you are 40 and a socialist, you have no brain." This is not merely a political point but it is a reflection on how people change with age. Priorities change. You cannot expect someone to be the same person throughout their entire life.
You might party a lot in college but once you get married, you have new priorities to be concerned with. Your friends who are still single may wonder why you are not partying as much and may even feel resentment towards you for in a sense turning your back on them.
Beyond the grief and guilt she might feel, I sense as if some on here feel as if someone is a hypocrite unless they live their life the same way, believe the same things from beginning until end.
People who joined, left or gone back to a religion, job, spouse, partner, etc all have a story that involves a turning point where they change course and started on a new journey. Along the way, you can easily not recognize the person you used to be for better or for worse.
Just because people grow older and gain more life experiences, exposure to different beliefs and values does not make them a hypocrite or mean they have some ulterior motive.
I know in my experience and in the experience of others, you can go through for example your schooling process and fail many tests and not try very hard or even care very much about your education and future and then you are exposed to a new reality or a new way of looking at things and now you are a straight A student that studies hard and has a solid plan for the future.
In some minds of some, you should only have a straight path with very little deviations. If anyone watched the NFC Championship game on Sunday you would know that the Russell Wilson in the last five minutes was nothing like the Russell Wilson of the previous 55 minutes.
Some people do go through life and it is pretty straightforward with no bumps while others are pretty insular and close minded about new ideas and experiences changing the way they think and act. This cuts across all boundaries in life whether it be ethnic, religious, political or social. This group of people just cant wrap their heads around the fact that other people have a different experience that has led them down a path that is different than the one they were once on.
On the contrary. I don't think anyone has said this woman may be a hypocrite for having had an abortion and now being opposed to them.
I'm sure that happens all the time. There are probably many who won't admit it who wish they'd had one instead of becoming a parent, and I cannot say I hold that against them either as long as they don't abuse their kids because of it.
The problem is with doing something because it was what you felt was best for you at the time, then taking such a militant stance against it in the future that you're trying your damnedest to make sure NOBODY ELSE CAN DO IT NOW.
I already said (and I think others said it here, too) that it's totally fine to be for something one day and against it years later. No biggie. People change.
But, to be so aggressively opposed to it and to keep the fact that you've done it yourself on the down low AND to be trying to block others from access to the same thing you did?
THAT is what I find to be potentially hypocritical.
Especially in the examples I gave earlier of people who'd block access to abortion AND refuse help to single and/or poor women who need help to raise the child they weren't allowed to abort when they knew they could not provide for it.
And, let's not throw adoption into the mix, because that is potentially damaging to a woman's mental health, too. I know more than one woman in therapy right now because they were teen moms who gave up kids that they can no longer find because the adoptive parents decided to cut off their access after initially agreeing to let them have some sort of connection to their birth children.
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Maybe I missed something but how do you know she is not honest? There are plenty of reasons why is against abortion now, do you have anything to prove that she is a hypocrite or is lying?
I assume the OP has never heard this woman speak up on FB and announce that she has had an abortion, yet the woman is frequently posting anti-abortion rhetoric.
Which would make me think this woman wasn't being 100% truthful with the public, too.
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Is it guilt? Is it regret? Oh course it is going to be different for every person but I find it so strange a woman who was able to change the course of her life with a safe, legal termination would work so hard to keep this away from other vulnerable women.
Insights?
How do you know she only had one abortion?
Maybe she feels that at a young age she was duped by extreme pro-abortion forces who told her it was no big deal to have an abortion, and realized later that it was a big deal. Maybe she wants to let other vulnerable young girls know how she feels. Maybe she feels guilty. A combination of all that and more?
In the post below you say that this isn't an abortion debate
Quote:
Originally Posted by RedZin
This thread is about someone's behavior on social media. It's not an abortion debate.
But in this post you argue a pro abortion viewpoint...
Quote:
Originally Posted by RedZin
I'm all for arguing for rights for babies once they're capable of surviving (realistically, none of that "but there was a baby who survived at 20 weeks' gestation stuff) outside the uterus. Other than that, let's stick to the humans who are already outside the womb, and leave women's wombs to them.
Why can't people on both sides agree that everyone has the the right to
speak out, advocate, try to change laws and fight for what they believe ???
I have a Facebook "friend"( actually an old high school classmate) who had a safe legal asbortion years ago. This changed her life and I'm sure she would admit for the better. She does not know I know but I was dating her brother at the time and he confided in me.
She went on to have 3 healthy and much loved children and short marriage with the same guy who fathered all the children. Now in our 60's she is an ultra conservative anti choice champion always posting "pro life" stuff on FB.
Is it guilt? Is it regret? Oh course it is going to be different for every person but I find it so strange a woman who was able to change the course of her life with a safe, legal termination would work so hard to keep this away from other vulnerable women.
Insights?
Because once you have a child, you realize what you actually did by having an abortion - something most young women just don't understand at the time. It's horrifying, and this is probably her way of making up for it - save other babies from "murder."
Unfortunately, anti-choice people waste their time trying to take away the choice to abort instead of trying to make the choice to have a baby a more realistic and less disruptive option for pregnant women. Women who have abortions often feel not that they are exercising a choice, but that they don't have a choice - that having a child isn't possible for them. Perhaps if "prolifers" tried to provide more choice instead of less choice in that situation they would be more successful in saving the people they claim to want to save.
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