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When I went for my interview at my current job, I started out as a temp. The agency told me they're looking for someone extroverted. I got the job and I fit in well. Now that I'm allowing myself to get close to some of them, they're only seeing it now (a year later) that I'm faking it at work. The funny thing is, the ones I have gotten close to are also introverts and faking it at work also.
I say "faking" but more like, "doing what we need to do to get the job done and done well". Then going home to decompress from the day.
That 'faking' that you describe makes up a large part of my day; I feel like I have to fake so many behaviors daily in order to simply get by. I think often about the wide variety of social masks that I feel compelled to wear constantly just to meet the various social demands/expectations of various social situations, and it never ceases to amaze me how phony I feel. The 'real' me is often tucked deeply underneath a well-crafted social facade. I am a natural introvert , but I do enjoy socializing to a degree, so I make concerted efforts to play thè social game; and part of that is because I want to socialize more and be more friendly, but it takes a lot of effort. I am one of those introverts that doesn't want to become more introverted, because I often times start to feel too isolated and lonely when I seclude myself.
I'm usually alone in my office. Participation in a huge project has landed me a roommate. Between the perfume, hours-upon-hours of conference calls on speakerphone and constant drop-ins from other co-workers for the 5 billion psuedo crunch-time meetings it's driving me crazy. I'm resentful when I first walk in in the morning, because I know my silence and peace will be invaded upon all day.
They've all gone out to lunch. To whatever Higher Power exists in this world at this very second, I bequeath a humble and grateful THANK YOU!!!
Oh, and I also love the self checkout, although no matter how "right" I am with it (scanning one item at a time, placing everything in the shopping bag carousel so the sensor can "count" the items, etc) it always ends up blaring out "SEE ATTENDANT FOR ASSISTANCE" and I have to distract the attendant from her/his cell phone to FIX MY $#*& so I can go
I stay by myself in my room a lot. I mostly only go out to walk my dogs. I never like to sing in public so I sing in the car or if I'm walking to the door I make sure no one's around first though that's kind of a courtesy because I'm sure no one would want to hear me since I'm not rhythmic/in pitch. When I went to Sea World and went in the water with dolphins, it wasn't as enjoyable as it should have been because of all the people around. I never pursued my childhood dream of being an actress because I would really hate having no privacy and being in the spotlight all the time. I feel more connected/attracted to musicians than other 'types' of guys. On a similar note, I have no interest in trying to be in a relationship (probly a good thing because musicians are hard to find as most I see are famous to some extent). Guys have pursued me. I don't pursue them.
I find job searching to be the hardest thing in the world because I know places often want sociable people.
If I don't travel with my husband then I travel alone. Will not travel with friends.
My health-walks must be done alone.
I don't like to socialize in groups of more than 4, and prefer just 2.
I do not entertain at home, and do not like people staying overnight in my house.
Except for the ones I consider friends, I don't give a rip about meeting co-workers after work (I already spend 40 hours of my waking hours with them).
I can enjoy a movie with a friend but I also enjoy it alone. Same with eating in a restaurant.
I am an introvert I LIKE people. I am not really shy, I like interacting with store clerks, chatting with friends, going to parties, small talk.
All of it. Up to my personal 'overload' point, and whenever that kicks in, I need to sit by myself and re-charge.
The only thing that really bugs me all the time is loud, incessant noise.
I wouldn't say I love people, but I don't care to be one of their crowd. I don't put myself in a crowd unless I need to be there, but I sit back on the side and watch. I like to get a feel of the place and people. I have 'senses' which I can't explain, that little whisper in your ear to BE CAREFUL, and pay attention to them. But its interesting to watch the games as people interact. I'm not much for that but so long as I don't have be a part of it I can also tune it out if I want.
I think that because I am a 'sensitive', groups make me uneasy and groups with sensory overload added make me go. And sometimes I can feel this edge of anger out there and don't choose to let it touch me. But when its mundane stuff, sometimes its a nice rest to wait with people. When I saw my doctor at a county clinic, it was always running late and people got frustrated and ansy. I'd bring something to do, crocheting of stitching usually. But I'd disconnect myself from there emotional stream and watch how they coped with the waiting and it would end up not such a bad afternoon.
Loud places are iffy for me, but I do crank up the music at home.
If you don't like crowds, am I alone is not liking them because I empathically 'feel' them too deeply?
I wouldn't say I love people, but I don't care to be one of their crowd. I don't put myself in a crowd unless I need to be there, but I sit back on the side and watch. I like to get a feel of the place and people. I have 'senses' which I can't explain, that little whisper in your ear to BE CAREFUL, and pay attention to them. But its interesting to watch the games as people interact. I'm not much for that but so long as I don't have be a part of it I can also tune it out if I want.
I think that because I am a 'sensitive', groups make me uneasy and groups with sensory overload added make me go. And sometimes I can feel this edge of anger out there and don't choose to let it touch me. But when its mundane stuff, sometimes its a nice rest to wait with people. When I saw my doctor at a county clinic, it was always running late and people got frustrated and ansy. I'd bring something to do, crocheting of stitching usually. But I'd disconnect myself from there emotional stream and watch how they coped with the waiting and it would end up not such a bad afternoon.
Loud places are iffy for me, but I do crank up the music at home.
If you don't like crowds, am I alone is not liking them because I empathically 'feel' them too deeply?
Probably not...I may have had a touch of that myself now and again.
nope, more like a lifetimes experience, people are not to be trusted and are not likeable in the 21st Century, so I have as little to do with them as possible. I was brought up alone and I don't "need" to be around people like most seem to have to. I don't hate people, I just have no time for them.
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