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I've been thinking a lot lately about this. It seems there are all types of personality disorders. Imo, some of these folks just have bad attitudes and poor characters.
For instance, I have a family member who rages for weeks at a time. Not 24/7, but she actually hops from person to person picking fights and raging against her target du jour. When she's done, she just starts acting "normal" and says "Everyone knows that I don't stay mad long". All the while, smirking like she's just gotten away with something.
When do you try to help someone to see they're wrong? From a layman's viewpoint, when do you attempt to get them help? And when do you chalk it up to a character flaw? What's the difference between a personality disorder and a mean 'ole brute of a person?
I appreciate your thoughts kibbiekat. I have no idea what's wrong with her. Her behavior is escalating big time. So you may be right. I'll look into the bipolar angle. I just thought that was highs, followed by lows. But you may be right.
Kibbiekat - bipolar? She doesn't have extreme lows. No depression. Just raging.[/quote]
Bipolar isn't just about extreme emotions. Their's 2 types. I'm going to copy the definitions from wiki because I'm too lazy to type it all.
Quote:
Bipolar I disorder: At least one manic episode is necessary to make the diagnosis;[74] depressive episodes are common in bipolar disorder I, but are unnecessary for the diagnosis.[7]
Bipolar II disorder: No manic episodes, but one or more hypomanic episodes and one or more major depressive episode.[74] Hypomanic episodes do not go to the full extremes of mania (i.e., do not usually cause severe social or occupational impairment, and are without psychosis), and this can make bipolar II more difficult to diagnose, since the hypomanic episodes may simply appear as a period of successful high productivity and is reported less frequently than a distressing, crippling depression.
As for your question about when to get them help, my brutally honest answer is you can talk with her and suggest things. However if she doesn't want to recognize she has a mental illness and doesn't want to get help there really is nothing you can do. If it goes that way you'd be best to set boundaries and take firm stances on what behavior of hers you'll tolerate.
Does she have any other symptoms like suicidiality, self-injury, very little to no impulse control, black and white thinking, risky behaviors (random sex, spending, drugs, alcohol) trouble maintaining relationships or has a serious fear of abandonment?
Last edited by Miss Blue; 05-12-2015 at 09:43 PM..
Thank you WeHa for the info. I didn't realize there was more to bipolar than the extremes.
She definitely has the black and white thinking. Mostly, things are all bad and she can't see the good in the things in front of her. Her community, family, neighbors, etc.The grass is always greener elsewhere. And she definitely has trouble maintaining relationships. She has lost all of her friends except a couple of new ones. And they've "become a different person" as she's told me recently about one of them. So I know she's almost on the outs with this lady.
She has very little impulse control when it comes to her finances. She is a wreckless shopper and doesn't consider the consequences of her purchases. She has a fear of being left out of things. It's hard to explain as she's almost 40. But she literally freezes if she finds out that family or friends have done something without including her. Is that fear of abandonment?
I'm in no way saying she has this, and it truly is something that needs to be diagnosed by a professional. A lot of her behaviors fall in line with borderline personality disorder.
I'd suggest you reading up on it. Not from the stand point of trying to help your sister because you can't change anyone else, but it might give you some help and suggestions for how to deal with your sister.
Bipolar isn't just about extreme emotions. Their's 2 types. I'm going to copy the definitions from wiki because I'm too lazy to type it all.
Doesn't matter, what the OP posted is nothing like bipolar.
It might be one of the personality disorders, such as Borderline Personality, but there's not enough in the OP to say that either. This isn't something that can be diagnosed on city-data one way or the other.
My take on the situation is that it doesn't much matter, the only thing one can do is remove one's self from the situation and refuse to be caught up in the drama.
I have a sister with borderline PD and my mother most likely had it as well. I was the only one in the family who would deal with my mother at all to the day she died. Enough is enough - when my mother was alive, there was no such diagnosis, even if she had sought help or treatment. My sister know she needs professional help but refuses to seek it - hence I have removed myself from her life altogether.
To me it is mostly immaterial whether its a personality (or some other) disorder, or "bad character". You can be supportive if they're seeking change (if you want), but if they're not, you can't fix 'em. Get out while you still can!
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