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The issue is that "growing up" doesn't look like I thought it would and I miss the joy and excitement of my younger, more carefree days.
Hang in there, this feeling passes. It's like when you total your beloved first car and someone hands you a new one and says "this is your car now. This is your reality now". And you miss the old one and aren't happy at all with the new one. But over time, you begin to appreciate what the new car has to offer, and then you eventually find that you don't miss the old one anymore.
That may be a terrible analogy. My point is, at every point in life where you feel like one phase is ending and a new one is beginning, you will have these feelings. And they will pass. It happens again and again - look out for when you're turning 35 - you won't believe that you made such a big deal out of entering your thirties, when really, 32 is not much different than 28. 36, however, is way different than 28. All of my friends started noticeably aging around that age, and then you think "wait, are we middle aged now? Wait...am I a cougar??". (I'll never forget the first time a man in his twenties hit on me and it dawned on me that he saw me as an "alluring older woman". It was a shock. I was 34). And that's just life. Billions of humans before us have gone down this path. We'll survive it, too.
That being said and done, I have to echo what some older people have told me, this notion that age 22 is the peak of one's life is nonsense. Humans typically live many years, and you can have fun at almost any age.
That notion seems to be pretty heavily promoted by Hollywood and the entertainment industry. It seems our culture is very focused on college and post-college years. Once you hit 30 people are supposed to be old and not fun anymore. Of course that is a lie but its what the media likes to promote.
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Originally Posted by Hallouise
I would say early to mid-thirties are, broadly speaking, the best. It's before the years when your body really starts to age, but for most people, they know who they are and what they want out of life by then. And their quality of living is generally higher.
This is what I am kind of afraid of. I am going to be 30 in a few months, but right now my life is so bogged down in responsibility, debt, and waiting out the consequences of poor decisions during my twenties I am not going to have the kind of freedom I would like to have to enjoy this phase of my life. By the time I get 35, my options will start to open up but by that time, the years will be beginning to take their toll.
My 20's were not good, I had a lot of issues, family, financial and romantic. I didn't really start getting to live the life I wanted until I was close to 40, but in general from 26 on up every year got better than the one before.
Right on! I'm 43 and every year mine has gotten better, in almost every area too: Financials are much better, A little heavier but still in good shape, improved relationship and interpersonal skills. Not hung up on chasing flaky young women. Go figure, I thought it was supposed to get worse
I think it really depends on your life, but for me, my college years were my happiest. I had all the freedom of adulthood, without all the responsibilities.
My forties were great. There's a saying life begins at forty. For some that's how it is. I hate to think my early 20s were the best. When my mother was 75, she said she and my father felt like they were in their thirties and life was grand.
I think a person carries their happiness with them and blaming it on a city is a sad state of affairs.
I think it really depends on your life, but for me, my college years were my happiest. I had all the freedom of adulthood, without all the responsibilities.
Yeah it is interesting to see everyone's opinions on this. I look back on college with some nostalgia as it was a simpler time, but my college years didn't hold a candle to my immediate post-college years (22-25) which were the best of my life. I was extremely insecure in college so I didn't take full advantage of certain situations so it wasn't what could have been. In my post-college years however, I did what I wanted to do and made the most of it. I have a friend who graduated college at age 23 but his life basically stopped there. Today is actually his 31st birthday and all he talks about is the good ole' days of college. His entire social life revolves around his college alumni network. It's really like he never moved on which is kind of sad. He is an example of what to NOT let nostalgia do. I have an uncle that is the same way but his golden era was high school.
I enjoyed my 30s a lot more. I was experienced enough to have a responsible and high paying job, so had plenty of money. I was better looking than I was when I was younger. I was sexually more capable and experienced, and had my pick of any woman from 18 to 40. Money, style, experience, what's not to like? I was never big on clubbing, since I found it boring and didn't care for bar flies.
I don't want to really delve into the causes, but my early 20's were among the most depressed years of my life. Which was a shame because I was not bogged down with a husband and kids (and, no, that was NOT one of my reasons for being miserable at the time).
But I've had other bad periods. The 90's gave me the passing of my daughter, the passing of my mother after an estrangement that was never worked out, and heart disease that almost took my life.
Last couple of years have not been good ones, either.
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