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Old 08-01-2015, 10:08 PM
 
5 posts, read 3,114 times
Reputation: 12

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Hi, I am a male and had recently purchased a pair of clip on earrings. I bought those because I don't like having holes in my ears when I'm not wearing them. It just feels weird to me. Call me crazy but that's just me lol. Anyways its been about 8 years that I was in denial of wanting earrings, but I realized its what I've always wanted. The issue I have is how do I handle telling my parents and family? I guess its not them so much I'm worried about, Its my grandparents haha!. My grandpa is the one I'm worried about the most. He always griped about my cousins with their earrings and tattoos when they were younger. Hopefully it won't be that way for me. This has caused me to become really anxious to the point where I have an upset stomach and it takes me an eternity to eat... Hopefully that will go away eventually?? It really irritates me with some of the norms in our society that judge and automatically turn down people with jobs based on their appearance. I get some piercings and tattoos may be too distracting for people, but most of the time that's not the case IMO.
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Old 08-01-2015, 10:16 PM
 
Location: CO
2,453 posts, read 3,625,482 times
Reputation: 5269
Have you actually worn them? Those clip-ons are quite painful. You may decide a hole in your ear is worth it. Anyway, save yourself some angst and don't wear them around your grandpa. Problem solved.
You say you aren't worried so much about the rest of your family so I'm sure they'll get used to it. But like anything out of the "norm" you can probably expect some side-eye. And you'll get used to that.
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Old 08-01-2015, 10:19 PM
 
4,761 posts, read 14,330,708 times
Reputation: 7960
I think the above is pretty good advice - just don't wear them around grandpa!
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Old 08-01-2015, 10:25 PM
 
35,094 posts, read 51,420,172 times
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If you have anxiety from one pair of earrings you bought the wrong pair to wear around Grandpa so you should probably not wear them around Grandpa or anyone else in your family who won't understand whatever it is you think they need to understand.
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Old 08-02-2015, 07:46 AM
 
Location: Middle America
37,409 posts, read 53,765,936 times
Reputation: 53075
How old are you?

It seems strange that a grandparent's potential disapproval of a pretty innocuous choice should cause you such distress that you can't eat, etc., unless you are pretty young and/or have some boundary issues.

You can't control people's reactions to things you do or don't do, so if it's truly a big problem for you, it's an easy enough choice to NOT do the thing that may cause the reaction you fear around a person. Choose your battles.

You'll find that most people really don't care about things like jewelry and tattoos in day-to-day life. I suspect that you are either seeking attention or imagining a "shock value" that doesn't necessarily exist.
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Old 08-02-2015, 10:27 PM
 
Location: Southwest Washington State
30,585 posts, read 25,303,864 times
Reputation: 50812
Clip on earrings = ouch!

If you want earrings, get pierced. You don't have to wear the earrings all the time.

If you a grown man, you get to do whatever you want to with your body. Your parents will probably get over it. If you aren't a grown man, then wait till you are before you make a permanent change to your body.
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Old 08-05-2015, 12:43 PM
 
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
44,807 posts, read 81,756,982 times
Reputation: 58201
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
How old are you?

It seems strange that a grandparent's potential disapproval of a pretty innocuous choice should cause you such distress that you can't eat, etc., unless you are pretty young and/or have some boundary issues.

You can't control people's reactions to things you do or don't do, so if it's truly a big problem for you, it's an easy enough choice to NOT do the thing that may cause the reaction you fear around a person. Choose your battles.

You'll find that most people really don't care about things like jewelry and tattoos in day-to-day life. I suspect that you are either seeking attention or imagining a "shock value" that doesn't necessarily exist.
I'd ask that too. Unless you are 50, your parents were probably in the generation that started male earrings, back in the 1960s. If they are not making a fuss about it, I would not worry about the grandparents. Times have changed, you are not going to drive a Model T or watch a black and white TV to make them happy, are you? Don't stress out about what others might think.
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Old 08-05-2015, 04:01 PM
 
Location: MA
1,623 posts, read 1,732,375 times
Reputation: 3026
Its just earings who cares????
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