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Strenuous exercise. Talking to friends, which usually ends up with us laughing at the person at his/her expense. Making a ridiculous graphic of the person. Concocting absurd scenarios in my mind in which they suffer and die horribly, and working that into a piece of writing. The ol' picture on a dartboard. Focusing on how great life is without the person in it. Saying to myself, "Who cares about that fool? Better things to do." Doing those better things.
Wow, a lot of off-topic and not so useful answers here. I'm pretty old and I'm still pissed about stuff that happened when I was 5. I think some of those people might even be dead. Excessive exercise helps. Drinking doesn't help as much, but when exercise fails, it's an option.
Srsly smoke a bowl or roll a blunt. You'll feel better
I'm a the cup is half full kind of person but every once in awhile something happens that takes the wind out of your sail. Keeping these things in perspective is the key. Just recently I had a friend well ex friend now be so ugly to me that it made me cry for two days. Once I got over the fact that we will never be friends again I started looking at it from his perspective and came to the conclusion that he was in incredible pain and that made me cry for the both of us. What he said to me made no sense and I can only guess what a mess he is inside. That and he's a typical mean alcoholic with his stinkin thinkin mentality. That's on him. My big mistake was trying to give love and kindness to someone too emotionally shut down to process where I was coming from. Many have told me that he took it the wrong way. Yikes and yikes again. The very first words out of my mouth when we met was that John is the love of my life. I did ass/u/me that we were on the same page until I started to realize that maybe we weren't and made it clear again that this was a friendship. Now he hates me. That's so not the norm for me and I find it could be an interesting opportunity to grow as a person if he could explain his perspective in a rational non abusive way. Yeah I won't hold my breath. In the mean time I found this Milky Way with marshmallow inside and I will be riding my bike a lot. See the cup is still half full. I prefer to be happy and I will stop at nothing to achieve that goal.
Wow, a lot of off-topic and not so useful answers here. I'm pretty old and I'm still pissed about stuff that happened when I was 5. I think some of those people might even be dead.
What happened when you were 5 is now only memory. Just 'thinking' about what happened still pisses you.
Some of those people might even be dead. So what is pissing you now? Only your thought about.....then.
We readers don't have to know the specific content of your thoughts; but we do know it's your thoughts that now stimulate/evoke your emotions. (That's true of all of us). Look at all the 'problems' people write about here. The common denominator is "believing the thoughts as being as real as the content of thought".
Our amygdalas are literal, they can't distinguish perception from imagined images. Safety/survival is so important for our amygdalas, it takes no chances, "better be safe than sorry"
When a deer or rabbit hears a sound from behind a bush, they can't see what caused the sound, yet they don't take chances to see for sure, they flee to be sure to stay alive. That's how deeply rooted survival is in our neurology also.
How do you personally deal with pent-up hatred, rage, anger, resentment, past slights, and disgust? How do you re-direct such feelings in a healthy and constructive way?
I make a distinction between anger and hate. It's not the way most people define it.
For me, anger is an emotion, when you are walking around feeling. Anger will kill you young. When I'm angry, I try to stay away from anyone I can't get away with taking it out on, or have no just reason to take it out on.
For me, hate is a status. If I decide I hate something, it's simply to satisfy the part of me that needs never to pardon or excuse wrongness, yet must avoid dwelling on it (causing toxic anger). With me, there's nearly no return from hate, but that doesn't mean I think much about it. Hate is anyone or anything that, if there were no consequences, I would act to penalize. It is a consignment to outer darkness, a place from which there can be no recovery. Don't want apologies, peace talks, recompense, anything. Nothing that could happen to anything I truly hate, would cause me to feel any pang of compassion. I don't believe in fundamental universal inalienable human rights (nor do most people, though they refuse to admit it). I believe one can forfeit them.
I don't go to hate too readily, because it's better not to. I don't need to look for new things or people to hate; too many deserving candidates will volunteer already. But it's far better to hate than to give evil a pass, so long as you can avoid walking around angry. Evil makes its living off the misguided notion that forgiveness is always good, that we should turn the other cheek, that evil done fifty years ago is somehow now less evil, all the rationalizations people use to pressure decent people to pardon evil people. I consider most apologies insincere, though I am open to them if convinced it's not just "I'm sorry that this bothers you" or "I'm sorry you won't just let me off easy" or "I'm sorry I got caught."
I used to be angry way too often, until I divided things up in this way. Nothing stays in my angry category too long.
Wow, a lot of off-topic and not so useful answers here. I'm pretty old and I'm still pissed about stuff that happened when I was 5. I think some of those people might even be dead.
You stopped being afraid of 'bogyman' thought,(hopefully), but you still have the memory.
See what's possible? You can stop being pissed at your thoughts and still have the memories from age 5.
How do you personally deal with pent-up hatred, rage, anger, resentment, past slights, and disgust? How do you re-direct such feelings in a healthy and constructive way?
1. I don't have much of that in my life because...
2. I stay away from people who are toxic. Including blood relatives. I just remove them from my live.
Past slights are usually connected to toxic people. The longer you are removed from them, the better you will feel.
If these things are really eating away at you, I would see a counselor of some sort. You can become horribly ill by harboring such negative emotions.
Live my life and and live well. It's the best revenge. Oh and I make my feelings known early on so I won't have the pent up anger and resentment down the line. Another part is just letting go.
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