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Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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A perfect life as an introvert? One where I'm not judged for being reserved, not going out every weekend with people, and where someone doesn't write me off because I struggle with small talk.
Of the traits you mention, only the ones I've boldfaced are signs of introversion. Everything else is more personality or preference, as extroverts are quite capable of them.
Introversion is a matter of how you think, the actual way your brain processes information, not personal taste (minimalism) and values (donating to charity).
Great post. Many people claim the label of an introvert but have no idea what it actually means. It is more about how you "re-charge your batteries", so to speak. People who are introverts are often social--it is not a synonym for being shy or socially phobic. I am not sure why so many misconceptions persist about what it means to be an introvert.
I am not sure why so many misconceptions persist about what it means to be an introvert.
Probably because the majority of people are extroverts. They recharge their batteries by being around other people, and it's beyond their comprehension that some of us are drained by doing this.
I'm curious how many introverts would consider themselves to have 'inattentive' type ADD? I know I certainly do.
Not sure what you mean by this, but I wouldn't say I do. When something comes to me, and its not ready, it just plays in the background. I'm trying to figure out the problem of what to do with the kitchen floor, other than lose the plastic tile. Then I thought of the shed full of old hardwood floor pieces.... but its not time to get out the wood and sander and saw, so its playing out in the background trying to figure out the best way.
When I get to when I can get rid of the tiles which are coming off and tearing, holding the foot on the refigerator captive, everything but wood, tools and floor will be somewhere else. I'm either 'on' a task completely or not.
It isn't generally, or slowly its getting there. People still cast some suspicion on 'loners' and those who 'isolate'.
But my point was that in ways it REALLY counts, it is a very condescending perception. If your depressed, and your a loner, its assumed that your being more alone is a problem which must be fixed. And most treatments are designed for extraverts. It's good the public has started to see us as something okay, but we're still outsiders to many.
Not sure what you mean by this, but I wouldn't say I do. When something comes to me, and its not ready, it just plays in the background. I'm trying to figure out the problem of what to do with the kitchen floor, other than lose the plastic tile. Then I thought of the shed full of old hardwood floor pieces.... but its not time to get out the wood and sander and saw, so its playing out in the background trying to figure out the best way.
When I get to when I can get rid of the tiles which are coming off and tearing, holding the foot on the refigerator captive, everything but wood, tools and floor will be somewhere else. I'm either 'on' a task completely or not.
Inattentive ADDers tend to get focused on one thing, while ignoring other things (and people) they're not interested in at the time. They're not the hyperactive bouncing off the walls type like ADHD, but they are the ones you'll see sitting alone and daydreaming about something. Someone with inattentive ADD is usually perfectly happy being alone and studying something that they're interested in, and will often view other people as a distraction.
Probably because the majority of people are extroverts. They recharge their batteries by being around other people, and it's beyond their comprehension that some of us are drained by doing this.
I don't think we know for sure what percentage of the population are extroverts or introverts. But I find the "us vs them" mentality on this forum very strange. While introverts here keep insisting they are persecuted I am not seeing that at all (if anything, people are every negative about extroverts here).
I think a lot of this is Susan Cain's fault.
I can relate to almost all of the OP's post. Though I'm a little on the edge sometimes where I feel a need to be around people, like at a cafe, but not necessarily *with* them! I just moved from a busy street in an urban area to a bit of wilderness in a quieter area...and I love the nature and mostly the quiet, but I do miss some noise or interaction at night (I guess I have more energy then?).
Oh, and what I really need is a job that allows me to be an introvert, but also pays! Working on that one...
I am reclusive but not shy (as in, I can speak for myself).
My ideal life would be a sub-urban life. Making enough money to pay for what I want (pizza, buffet, health, shelter, clothes, movies, etc, nothing much, just small pleasures). A serene quiet life.
A perfect life as an introvert? One where I'm not judged for being reserved, not going out every weekend with people, and where someone doesn't write me off because I struggle with small talk.
Excellent description. I attend meet-ups with other seniors in my community and while I may enjoy spending an hour or so with them once a week, after an hour I'm ready to go back home to some peace and quiet.
They are all very nice people; however, I'm not one for continual small talk. Fortunately no one has stated, "You're sure quiet today.", a comment I cringe at; nor been asked, "Are you okay, you're sure quiet?" They're probably used to me being more of an observer and only interjecting comments or views that mean something instead of just yakking on and on about nothing.
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