Psychopath? Is that a bad thing? (husband, syndrome, generation, everything)

[Skyl3r]

Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth

Cute, OP, cute. That could be right, though, as there's some overlap between narcissistic disorder and the other. Also, I don't think your lack of distress upon your uncle dying is indicative of anything except the fact that you weren't that close to him (I assume). As long as you didn't torture bugs or animals as a kid, or don't derive a warped satisfaction from being mean to people, you're probably ok.

I appreciate that you think so.
My brother's were both there and both crying. They didn't know him any better or worse than me. If anything, I know my uncle more than they did, as they would often not see him when I would.

Originally Posted by CapnTrips

OP -- You should be commended for making the effort to find out about yourself and your impact on other people. If there are things about your personality or your life that concern you, by all means try to deal with them, but understand that diagnosing/labeling yourself or the things that you do is not really necessary, and that spending time online or elsewhere trying to diagnose yourself is just an intellectual distraction from dealing with what would be essentially emotional issues (to the extent that they may issues at all in your case).


Sometimes its hard enough even for a trained therapist to diagnose a particular personality disorder. Actually, some therapies do away with the DSM models altogether. Don't get hung up on the labels and deal with the issues in your life individually, as they present themselves day-to-day, using your heart as well as your mind. This is what we all do.

Haha, no... My head is big enough as it is.
I appreciate it though and as I said earlier, I don't take any of this as though it is an official diagnosis. What people think of you from talking to you is just as or more important than an official diagnosis in my mind.

Originally Posted by OverItAll

You sound more like an ordinary selfcentered egotist.

Thanks; I don't know the medical term to describe you.

Originally Posted by JrzDefector

If you have multiple friends emphatically saying you're a psychopath, you need to see a shrink. Because SOMETHING is wrong. You should be evaluated and discuss the next step with the mental health professional providing the diagnosis.

It might be something else entirely too - sometimes Asperger's can come off as extreme narcissism, for example, but a medical professional can tell the difference. Hell, you could just be extremely immature despite your ability to express yourself well.

But eventually, for most people with extreme mental health abnormalities like psychopathy (sorry TabulaRasa - I'm just going with the term for shorthand) life starts to fall apart. If your friends are telling you you're a psychopath, the odds are good they're not going to be your friend for much longer.

People who are "psychopaths" tend to do a lot of damage in their personal relationships. It's my belief though that one can retrain their brain to behave like a normal person if they're very committed to the idea and motivated to have a mentally healthy and functional life. It requires a lot of work though. I've had to retrain my brain to cope with my ADD, and it's a sort of constant vigilance.

My advice would be to get a diagnosis and then envision the kind of life you want. What makes you happy? Work with a therapist to modify your behaviors so that you can achieve that without damaging those around you.

It's really hard to say. It's hard to know whether they really believe that or they like ****ing with me.
I have serious doubts about being seriously immature. Unless you mean something about me hasn't matured as it's supposed to. I've been told where I work (I'm a network administrator) that I conduct myself with a high level professionalism; when I was young I would be commended for being "more mature" than other kids. I guess this meant not running around and screaming like an idiot.
I'm sure you didn't mean offense by that; but I am not particularly concerned that immaturity is the issue.

I'm actually pretty happy as it is. I have a good job, friends who I can hangout with most days of the week and I'm in class. This post was more exploring the potential of comments that have been made as opposed to fixing some gaping hole in my life.

Originally Posted by Northeaster

Nope, It makes one a dick.

If you look at any of my other threads, do I come off as a dick to you? Are you just saying that because I made a few blatantly narcissistic statements in the vein of getting honest feedback?
I do not walk around letting everyone know that I'm better than them. Because yes, I would be a dick.
I don't go into a new conversation with the presupposition that I am better than whoever I am talking to; because yes, I would be a dick. I talk to someone, analyze how they think. It becomes clear to me really fast if they are a capable minded individual (When I say this, I mean someone who can recognize patterns and derive new knowledge from this. Not someone who reads and regurgitates information.) My best friends are people who have this capable mind I'm talking about. We have intelligent discussions and learn new things each time we talk.

Originally Posted by clarksvillemom

You're probably not a psychopath, but you probably aren't much fun to be around. Now if you don't mind being by yourself, that's fine. But thinking you're smarter than everyone else, a big ego, inflated sense of self - none of those are attractive qualities.

Several people have told me they inexplicably don't like me similarly to how you just have; and what I've noticed every time is that this is not a person I would care to dedicate my time to in any case.

Originally Posted by kitty61

I've observed people using the terms "psycho" and "you're off your rocker" as catch phrases to describe an oddball-type. A psychopath is extremely dangerous not able to resist acting out their demented thoughts. Serial killers are psychos that start out torturing and killing small animals. They have neither a conscience nor a filter. There is no cure.
One cannot possibly understand how deranged these people are until you have fallen into their trap. You will never be able to detect who is one and who is not. This is their expertise. You won't see any red flags.

Haha, sounds like a book. I talked with my friend who called me a psychopath a bit more about it and explained the definition as given by TabulaRasa. He told me that's not really what he was thinking of when he was calling me a psychopath. I'm assuming he was meaning what was previously in this thread described as "pop psychology psychopath."

Originally Posted by Sydspapa

My Mom was a narcissist psychopath. Very emotionless and calculating. Played favorites and siblings against siblings. I have had much therapy in my late teens and early adulthood to really understand the extent of what she did to all of us. She would love bomb us and make us feel like the best kids in the world only to turn very dark and distant a day later. There were many men in and out of our lives as we grew up as well, she couldn't maintain a relationship due to her issues.

Kids are impressionable and can really be messed up by this, they are also resilient so that has helped me not fall prey to my growing up years.

Wow, that's wild. I've yet to meet anyone like that. I can't imagine growing up with a mother like that.

[jbgusa]

One of my friends is a leading professor that has studied psychopathy or sociopathy. He says that psychopaths have little in the way of conscience and can lie with the same effect as if telling the truth.

[jbgusa]

Originally Posted by banjomike

Psychopaths are all very charming people and expert imitators. The learn how to imitate other's feelings early, as they have none themselves; they are all emotionally hollow on the inside, so they learn how to be mirrors. They reflect back what they perceive other's emotions are, projecting happiness back when another is happy, or sorrow when another person is sorrowful, while never sharing those emotions or feeling them themselves.

They fake empathy and sympathy better than anyone else, and this always becomes part of the chaos they create around them wherever they go. Few people can resist their wiles until much damage has been done.

Bill Clinton is said to be a classic psychopath where as Nixon was more a paranoid type.

[unwillingphoenician]

I have concerns about the use of terms like psychopath by laypeople (I'm one) and especially in the context of law enforcement.

Here's why: Deputy Dawg fixes his attention on Person X, for whatever reason. Deputy Dawg looks closely at Person X, and finds nothing. Deputy Dawg looks even more closely at Person X, maybe breaking the rules a little bit, reading emails and so on, and still finds nothing. But now Deputy Dawg, who is also a layperson, remembers the word psychopath, from some context or other, maybe a TV show, and especially the part of the definition that says that psychopaths are really good at hiding things. Before I go further, here's a little background on Deputy Dawg. He is like the rest of us. He thinks he's right because, well, he's Deputy Dawg, after all. It's the same reason your little sister thinks she's going to fix her no-good boyfriend. She's herself, after all, and she's special. So Deputy Dawg is very certain that he got things right the first time he looked at Person X. There was something there, or he wouldn't have looked. Yet he has come up with nothing. So he wraps his arms around the word psychopath and goes, "Aha! The reason I am not finding anything is that Person X is a psychopath, and really good at hiding things! He acts just like he's a normal person! I have always been right about Person X!"

I'm sure anybody can appreciate the potential problems with that style of law enforcement. It comes much closer to a witch-hunt than it does an evidence-based investigation. Once you accuse someone of something, they're guilty, no matter what happens. If you find evidence, that confirms what you thought. But if you don't find evidence, that also confirms what you thought. Exactly the same as calling somebody a witch and throwing them in a lake in the old days. If they floated, they were witches, and if they sank and drowned, they weren't.

I think law enforcement has to be evidence-based, period, end of discussion, with no reference to pop psychology, either formally, or in backroom discussions, or wherever. Discussions of this type in a law enforcement context come closer to the supernatural than they do fact-finding. Either you have a smoking gun or you don't. Once you find a smoking gun, if you do, it might be interesting and productive to look back at why Person X fooled you, if that was the case, but to engage in that kind of conjecture beforehand is fraught with peril.

I think I'm being very charitable in outlining this scenario. A more common occurence is probably Joe or Jane Sixpack looking at the television set, and on the basis of somebody's appearance or attitude, or on the basis of Nancy Grace's framing who Person X is for them, deciding that Person X is a psychopath and wondering what nasty deeds they are hiding. It just has to stop. Best.

[oh-eve]

Originally Posted by Skyl3r

1. GRANDIOSE SELF-WORTH - I think I can safely say I think very highly of myself. The weird thing is I tell myself "No, you're not like them. Your thoughts are justified because you really are as great as you think." Which of course is reaffirmed when I talk to other people who think they're intelligent.

If you think you are so great, does that mean you are also smarter than most others?




If you are wrong in something, do you accept responsibility or do you find excuses?


Do you think you look great and how so? Do you put a lot of effort in your appearance like working out, nice hair cut, clothes ...?




My ex looks below average, has hardly any education, no empathy but thinks he can have pretty women (therefore he is single forever), is mad at the world for not throwing a great job at him, wonders why he never gets promoted (he is lazy) and thinks normal weight women are fat, while he has a double chin and beer belly. He is smart though. Just no sense for reality and I always wonder what is going on in his head.


Are you reaching a lot in life, are ambitious and have a reason to think you are super awesome or are you delusional as well? No offense, just being curious.

[CA4Now]

Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life

Would a true psychopath even care that they rub others the wrong way or seek help?

The person wouldn't be considered a psychopath if he or she had the capacity to care. Lack of remorse is one of its defining features.

[CA4Now]

Originally Posted by jbgusa

Bill Clinton is said to be a classic psychopath where as Nixon was more a paranoid type.

By whom? And there is no such thing as a "paranoid type" psychopath. Talk about pop psychology....

//www.city-data.com/forum/psych...rder-make.html

[ironpony]

Could you ask your friends for some examples on what you have done that was manipulative?

[TabulaRasa]

Originally Posted by Skyl3r

I appreciate that you think so.
My brother's were both there and both crying. They didn't know him any better or worse than me. If anything, I know my uncle more than they did, as they would often not see him when I would.

Eh, they may be more sensitive, or more outwardly emotive than you. But being less sensitive and/or less emotive isn't in and of itself an indicator of abnormality. These things exist within a range. Some people cry at Budweiser's Superbowl commercials and Hallmark Hall of Fame movies. Others don't cry even in the face of tragic loss. Did you CARE that your uncle had died? Did you think to yourself, "Thank God he's gone," or feel glee over it? If not, I wouldn't read too much into it.

[TabulaRasa]

Originally Posted by jbgusa

Bill Clinton is said to be a classic psychopath where as Nixon was more a paranoid type.

Persecutory delusions (i.e. paranoia) are specifiers in a number of mental disorders, but this is not one of them. There is not a "paranoid type" for antisocial personality disorder.

I would also argue that Clinton does not likely fit the APD bill at all, based on observable behavior.