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Old 04-08-2024, 07:57 PM
 
21,881 posts, read 12,936,608 times
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I could cite myriad examples of this, as it happens all too frequently, but today was a classic case.

There was going to be an eclipse; a TOTAL eclipse - a rare event never to recur in my lifetime, most likely. An astronomical event in which I have an interest as I do in all things relating to nature. Totality was going to be available in my very own state, just a few hours away. Furthermore, it was going to be in a location which I've been wanting and meaning to visit for years now, but never have; I've even had accommodations there selected. I'm retired and have a totally flexible schedule; in fact, I had nothing to do today and tomorrow and am bored. I was aware of all of this on some level. Yet I did nothing about it. It wasn't until the event had occurred and the opportunity had passed that it registered with me that I should have gone to see this and enjoyed the destination, and now I'm kicking myself. It's a familiar feeling!

Too often, I can't see what I SHOULD have done until it's too late to do it, and then it's crystal clear. "Regrets, I've had a few" million! Either, as with the eclipse, it just doesn't occur to me in time OR I'm torn by indecision and only after one outcome results do I see that the other would've been preferable. I almost never get it right. This, in turn, makes me even more anxious about making decisions, certain that I'll make the wrong one.

I just call it "stupidity," yet I'm not stupid. It's obvious to me what other people should do in their circumstances, but not myself. It must be a clinical condition of some sort. It feels almost like self-sabotage.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Last edited by otterhere; 04-08-2024 at 08:11 PM..
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Old 04-09-2024, 06:40 AM
 
Location: A Yankee in northeast TN
16,066 posts, read 21,123,322 times
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Well I procrastinate more than I should and during an argument with my daughter over one such episode she threw this term at me. executive-dysfunction An interesting read and seems to fit me in some ways, not so much in others.
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/healt...ve-dysfunction
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Old 04-09-2024, 07:07 AM
 
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Don't give shrinks any ideas for new 'mental illnesses.' Dithering and Hesitation Disorder! DAHD as opposed to ADHD. They can use that to sell more drugs!
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Old 04-09-2024, 07:13 AM
 
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Yes, the term executive function (or lack thereof) has popped into my head a time or two when I ponder this, yet I have been and still am capable of some amazing feats from time to time, so it seems to be intermittent or selective, which wouldn't really be characteristic of that defect. I also suffer from some low-grade chronic anxiety and depression, so that may "cloud my mind." But you'd think, just given the law of averages, some of these fluff-ups would be to my advantage, yet they always harm or damage me in some way. Self-punitive?
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Old 04-09-2024, 08:20 AM
 
Location: Glasgow Scotland
18,525 posts, read 18,732,187 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mascoma View Post
Don't give shrinks any ideas for new 'mental illnesses.' Dithering and Hesitation Disorder! DAHD as opposed to ADHD. They can use that to sell more drugs!
hahahaahah true..
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Old 04-09-2024, 08:25 AM
 
21,881 posts, read 12,936,608 times
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Okay, so there already IS such a thing as a "self-defeating personality disorder." Thanks, Google!
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Old 04-09-2024, 09:55 AM
 
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Well just think of it this way, there were people that planned and took time off from work to go to an area in the path of totality, rented an expensive air b&b (rates soared because of this event), took themselves and/or family down there whether driving or flying. Got there and most of the paths of totality were overcast and cloudy. Texas for example.

So a lot of folks have regrets for that day, whether planning to go or not. If it would have been a huge deal for you to go, I am sure you would have found a way. It, for some reason, was just not that critical.

Why don't you find a tv special on the eclipse and watch it. They had a number of those going in 2017 when we were in the path of totality. It was very interesting to watch the planners and scientists map out the path and they recorded what was going on in various cities as well as a scientific narrative.
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Old 04-09-2024, 10:31 AM
 
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Yes, and it actually turned out to be cloudy there. Still, I would've enjoyed my little getaway... I can and do plan and execute other trips, yet somehow this unrepeatable once-in-a-lifetime trip flew right under my radar. Why? It's just one instance in a larger pattern of shooting myself in the foot which I find unfathomable and also very disturbing.
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Old 04-09-2024, 11:16 AM
 
Location: PNW
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I did it when it happened in my state in 2017. It was more fun because I took a friend. It was a really long day and we still cherish the memories of having gotten up very early to get down to a more perfect viewing area. We were down there so early we had breakfast, etc. There was a ton of traffic to get back and by the end of it we were pretty exhausted. The bonus was we took a day off of work (making it sweeter still).

I just ignored it this time because I was not going to fly somewhere to do that. A different prospect when it's 2 hours from home...
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Old 04-09-2024, 11:17 AM
 
Location: PNW
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You may not have been able to stay at your preferred accommodations because you probably need to book reservations a year in advance for something like this.
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