Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
High school classmate, aged 22, is terminally ill with cancer. What to say to him to console? He wishes to marry and have a family, but is expected to die within the next few months.
I wasn't that close with him, but we spoke from time to time. We still talk, and i think i am one of the very few who actually talks to him (but god knows that the second he dies, his fb wall would explode into a shrine of sweet messages). Pretty nice guy, but thinks of himself as a loser (girls don't like him very much, but it was mostly due to his lack of confidence, bangs in his face, and social awkwardness)
So what to say? Oh yeah, would love to keep this secular.
Why do you have to say anything special ? Just say how sorry you are that he is going through this. Then, just talk to him like a regular person. Ask him if he needs anything. Follow his lead. Be a friend.
There's nothing you can say, but as the other poster said, be his friend. Spend a little time and listen to what he has to say. You will never regret it.
Maybe let him know you will always remember him and that you are glad to know him.
But if he does bring it up, allow him to speak about it. Listen. It is OK to say how sorry you are then. But listening with focus is probably the greatest gift you can give him.
I think it's important to say (only if it's true) that as a friend you want to help with things he might need, then offer up specific examples like: a ride to and from treatments (if he's still taking them), picking up groceries or other items he might need you to shop for, to come over and watch movies with him, or fix him a meal now and then and eat with him. Even just to hang out. Once you've said how sorry you are that this is happening to him, and how much it stinks, you have to talk about something else unless he wants to talk about his deeper "stuff". Sometimes all you can do is listen. Do come prepared with a few non-cancer topics in your mind that you can bring up if the conversation lags. Could be things like what's going on with people you both know, or things that are going on around your town that he and you might have opinions about. Just things to keep the silences from becoming awkward. Sometimes he might just want to sit on the porch and have a beer.
Good for you for being a friend who will be there for him, and WITH HIM, when he needs it.
he's 22... and should be on his short bucket list???
id get a collection together and hire him a very pretty prostitute..
give him a thrill before he goes to the great beyond
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
