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There was one time where I was posting on a message board and they said I needed to capitalize my posts so when they had me do that, it threw the whole aesthetics off for me and then I wasted hours editing posts from years ago.
Yeah that is a bit OCD, I don't think it was necessary to correct old posts, people were just asking you to work on things going forward. I certainly appreciate that you fixed your OLS (OnLine Sloppiness) so that it is easy for me to read your posts.
I will tell you a related pet peeve of mine ... people assume too much.
An example from my life is that I will go to a new doctor, they will see that I am about 20 lbs overweight and since I'm diabetic they don't like that. You can just see the wheels turning and the judgments forming. I always make a point to tell them that I used to be 100 lbs overweight and I got to where I am slowly, tortuously, over a decade, and have kept that weight off for a decade more, even after my body developed superpowers such that I can gain weight just by LOOKING at food. I abuse myself daily, fitbit on my wrist, clocking in 10 to 14K steps, killing 2 hours a day I'd rather be doing something else. So no, doc, you don't get to judge me for being 20 lbs overweight.
In your situation, people (including you apparently) could nit-pick about overlong sentences or insufficient paragraphing without giving a thought to the possibility that you went through a bunch of stress to improve to where you are. And you don't get credit for it. So ... consider this credit!! :-)
Anyway, no need to apologize about your writing, it's pretty clear and I expend more effort on deciphering other poster's word salads than I do yours. I think it's legitimate to post a first or second draft in an online forum. It's not like you're writing a formal essay or something.
biggest flaw is im an incredibly poor decision maker and what makes matters worse , im not a ditherer , i absolutely am decisive , its just i nearly always end up looking back and realising i should have made a different choice
the older i get the more i realise im a pretty stupid person which of course makes me like a sizeable chunk of the world
Yeah that is a bit OCD, I don't think it was necessary to correct old posts, people were just asking you to work on things going forward. I certainly appreciate that you fixed your OLS (OnLine Sloppiness) so that it is easy for me to read your posts.
I will tell you a related pet peeve of mine ... people assume too much.
An example from my life is that I will go to a new doctor, they will see that I am about 20 lbs overweight and since I'm diabetic they don't like that. You can just see the wheels turning and the judgments forming. I always make a point to tell them that I used to be 100 lbs overweight and I got to where I am slowly, tortuously, over a decade, and have kept that weight off for a decade more, even after my body developed superpowers such that I can gain weight just by LOOKING at food. I abuse myself daily, fitbit on my wrist, clocking in 10 to 14K steps, killing 2 hours a day I'd rather be doing something else. So no, doc, you don't get to judge me for being 20 lbs overweight.
In your situation, people (including you apparently) could nit-pick about overlong sentences or insufficient paragraphing without giving a thought to the possibility that you went through a bunch of stress to improve to where you are. And you don't get credit for it. So ... consider this credit!! :-)
Anyway, no need to apologize about your writing, it's pretty clear and I expend more effort on deciphering other poster's word salads than I do yours. I think it's legitimate to post a first or second draft in an online forum. It's not like you're writing a formal essay or something.
Oh no I know it's not really necessary but it's just a thing with me. There was one time I was in a chat room and I noticed I made a spelling error. I immediately put the star and the correct spelling after in my next message. Someone then responded "lol we don't care about spelling here". I was like "I know. It's just how I am"
I suppose sometimes I am more critical about my writing because it is one of the few things I am good at so I feel like it has to be perfect. I was always a natural writer but looking back, my texting was different. I abhorred it because it looks like I was guilty of writing abbreviations like "u". Maybe it was because of the phone I used idk. But I know my thoughts still tend to be unorganized at times. I always say I'm very verbose but not as articulate. My main problem is condensing. I know I can write an essay easily. On other websites, people would tell me they love my writing but I write too much. Funny thing is when I went to online college I had a difficult time getting enough words with certain subjects.
Oh no I know it's not really necessary but it's just a thing with me. There was one time I was in a chat room and I noticed I made a spelling error. I immediately put the star and the correct spelling after in my next message. Someone then responded "lol we don't care about spelling here". I was like "I know. It's just how I am"
I suppose sometimes I am more critical about my writing because it is one of the few things I am good at so I feel like it has to be perfect. I was always a natural writer but looking back, my texting was different. I abhorred it because it looks like I was guilty of writing abbreviations like "u". Maybe it was because of the phone I used idk. But I know my thoughts still tend to be unorganized at times. I always say I'm very verbose but not as articulate. My main problem is condensing. I know I can write an essay easily. On other websites, people would tell me they love my writing but I write too much. Funny thing is when I went to online college I had a difficult time getting enough words with certain subjects.
It is difficult for people with writing chops to remember sometimes that many people don't enjoy writing and many don't enjoy reading (and not necessarily because they are dyslexic or something). They are just far more verbal. So when faced with more than a few sentences in a post or email, the MEGO factor (Mine Eyes Glazeth Over) kicks in.
In business emails for example if you don't get right to the point and grab them in the first couple of sentences you might as well forget it.
So ... learning to condense is a good thing. Keep working on it, you'll improve.
It is difficult for people with writing chops to remember sometimes that many people don't enjoy writing and many don't enjoy reading (and not necessarily because they are dyslexic or something). They are just far more verbal. So when faced with more than a few sentences in a post or email, the MEGO factor (Mine Eyes Glazeth Over) kicks in.
In business emails for example if you don't get right to the point and grab them in the first couple of sentences you might as well forget it.
So ... learning to condense is a good thing. Keep working on it, you'll improve.
I'm finding this to be true more and more. Sometimes when I text the guy I'm with, he'll be like "you sent me this long ass text and I have no idea what you are saying"
I also participated in this contest a while back. You had to make a video that was about 30 seconds long stating why you were the best choice for it. I was like "there is no way" I cut it down to the proper amount but I often still feel like I was missing something. That's what I'm faced with all the time. When I shorten something that I'm passionate/feel strongly enough about, I miss a very important point or at least I feel like I do.
Verbally, I'm the exact opposite yet simultaneously similar. I can't get straight to the point but it is reeking in a lack of substance. I'll often either have a long pause searching for the words or it may be straight nonsense. My most used words IRL: I don't know or I guess. Sometimes I might use those words in writing too but not as much and if I do I usually follow it with an explanation.
I think what makes it worse is when there is a crunch for time. I do terrible at interviews because I think "I know you're ready to look at your watch the minute I open my mouth"
I'm finding this to be true more and more. Sometimes when I text the guy I'm with, he'll be like "you sent me this long ass text and I have no idea what you are saying"
I also participated in this contest a while back. You had to make a video that was about 30 seconds long stating why you were the best choice for it. I was like "there is no way" I cut it down to the proper amount but I often still feel like I was missing something. That's what I'm faced with all the time. When I shorten something that I'm passionate/feel strongly enough about, I miss a very important point or at least I feel like I do.
Verbally, I'm the exact opposite yet simultaneously similar. I can't get straight to the point but it is reeking in a lack of substance. I'll often either have a long pause searching for the words or it may be straight nonsense. My most used words IRL: I don't know or I guess. Sometimes I might use those words in writing too but not as much and if I do I usually follow it with an explanation.
I think what makes it worse is when there is a crunch for time. I do terrible at interviews because I think "I know you're ready to look at your watch the minute I open my mouth"
In my own experience, I eventually figured out that my need for verbosity when not doing something like an essay that's supposed to be comprehensive, was self-indulgence (I just enjoy manipulating words) and a resulting lack of respect for / awareness of the value of other people's time.
My direct report is a woman who can't handle more than about four sentences in an email and yet if I get her on the phone she will talk my ear off. If I have to go in depth on anything I phone her. Sending her an email is worse than doing nothing.
But she is not a stupid person by any means. She is just very verbal.
My guess is that being detailed is your method of self-soothing against the fear of "getting it wrong" or being misunderstood. When you realize it works against you in other people's minds more than being wrong or misunderstood, you will be better able to self-edit. After all, if someone misunderstands you can always correct them; and if they correct you then you have learned something. What you will find however is that most of the time you are actually right, or right enough.
-low confidence
-lack of compassion for others
-hold grudges easily
-i dont plan ahead for many things
-highly impatient
-very selectively judgmental
-pessimistic
-i dislike most people for no particular reason and like to imagine what certain people would look like if they bounced off a car hood or fell down a long flight of stairs
-sometimes, i go out of my way to avoid neighbors or cross the street if i see a shady person approaching me on the same side.
-i dont capitalize on message boards.
My guess is that being detailed is your method of self-soothing against the fear of "getting it wrong" or being misunderstood. When you realize it works against you in other people's minds more than being wrong or misunderstood, you will be better able to self-edit. After all, if someone misunderstands you can always correct them; and if they correct you then you have learned something. What you will find however is that most of the time you are actually right, or right enough.
I do have a concern of being misunderstood but it proves to be difficult to ignore it because I know that I am a person that is often misunderstood. I know though in being verbose sometimes it's counter-productive but it almost seems like I don't know any other way...like my mind is too complex for that.
In certain cases maybe I can correct them but often I find it to be difficult to be simple without making a bad impression or at best looking average. For example, when they ask me in an interview why I've been looking for work I have said "I want to earn money" Well what does that say really? It's pretty much a blank statement that anyone could say. Same thing with saying "I'm reliable" People say it's okay to just say that and not go into any detail but I feel like anyone could say that too.
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