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I was born and raised in Las Vegas and that is exactly where I was raped and beaten. It was in a busy parking structure on a Friday night. Major strip hotel/casino. People and cars were milling around. After subduing me he just drug me into a dark corner and did his thing... after warning me to keep quiet or he'd kill me.
Not trying to rain on your parade, but you could be me. I'd been there a zillion times picking up a friend from work. I never felt unsafe. There were people and video cameras and I was parked less than 20 feet from the elevator. I was maybe 2 feet from my car when he grabbed me. Don't take your safety for granted, dont be me.
I think it is so important that you share this because the reality is it could happen to anyone. You can take all precautions in the world .... but if someone is randomly doing sick stuff like this you can just be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
It really gets me mad when something really unjustifiable happens to someone and people start to think well she should have been more careful. For me the bottom line is no .... that person should have never done this to you. No one has the right to victimize someone else. There is no excuse or blame that should be placed on the victim. NEVER!
I'm a 5'2" woman with little muscle mass. I also work all sorts of crazy hours at work and many a night find myself walking in a dark empty parking garage to my car. I carry pepper spray. Regardless I always feel uneasy as a woman.
How late is it typically when you get off the train? I've walked by myself at night in not so crowded areas of Chicago and haven't felt scared... I don't know.. maybe I just have a different mentality than some... I try to think mostly everyone is good and not out to attack you..
I truly wish I could see the world as you see it but my personal experience has been to be very careful where you find yourself if you are female.
I recall walking the two blocks back to my apartment from a friend's apartment at about midnight, and I came upon a man waiting in the alleyway. He popped his head out to see where I was just as I looked his way. I walked out into the middle of the road and screamed to try and come and get me. He took off running. I am sure if I had not been aware of the potential danger of being in the wrong place at the wrong time I would have been hurt and possibly killed.
I was 25 years of age at the time.
I am now 61. For me, that was a very timely message and I never forgot it.
I think that it is just plain common sense to know that good girls get hurt all the time. Treat your environment accordingly.
I also know of plenty of men that have been mugged for no other reason that because they were guys they thought they could walk around downtown in the middle of the night and think they were safe
Gangs these days are everywhere, riding around, looking for a target. That is just a fact of life anymore.
I do not feel afraid to walk alone at night. However, if I am in a remotely empty area or happen to be out late at night, I am definitely more aware of my surroundings. When I walk in my subdivision, I carry two 5 pound weights, sometimes it may be late at night. Not only to workout but for protection if anyone tried to attack me.
I second the recommendation to read "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin DeBecker. He's a security expert and his basic point is that fear is nature's early warning system, and to be aware of your instincts and heed them. We've all had it drummed into us to be polite and helpful and that's something that predators use to lure us in...a la Ted Bundy's act with his arm in a sling to get women to assist him. They all fell for his act because they wanted to be helpful. When you feel that creepy feeling, your spidy senses (thanks Spider-Man)are tingling, get the he** out of there, don't worry about being rude or what anyone may think of you, and be prepared to fight your way out. Do not ever get in a car with them. Fight back with full intention of inflicting serious bodily harm to them. Give up your purse or wallet and RUN toward safety, even if they have a gun. It's really hard to hit a moving target with a pistol unless you are an expert shot. Better to get shot in the arm, or something, than to be found dead dumped in the woods which is where you will end up if you get in that car. Be smart and carry a charged cell phone. If you drive, you should have AAA or some other roadside assistance coverage. When you break down, stay in the car with the doors locked until police or the tow service arrives.
Last edited by TheShadow; 03-12-2017 at 10:27 AM..
Anyone with common sense - man or woman - is at least cautious and cognizant of their surroundings when walking alone at night. OP sounds like she doesn't have any street smarts at all.
i haven't read the whole thread. but it could also have something to do with how you were raised. i know growing up my parents instilled a little bit of "fear" in me and talked about how things could go wrong all the time and how i had to be "careful" doing things that normal people did all the time. whereas my sister in law has been on her own since she was 18 and didn't have strong parent figures in her life and she is the most free spirited person ever.
i remember my sister in law was travelling alone for work and she was telling my mom about how she went hiking on a trail in the day time by herself and my mom flipped out like how could she do that ALONE that's so DANGEROUS. and in that moment i realized why i am the way i am, and why my sister in law is the way she is lol. because i would have had my mom's voice in my head saying not to hike on the trail alone lol.
I second the recommendation to read "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin DeBecker. He's a security expert and his basic point is that fear is nature's early warning system, and to be aware of your instincts and heed them. We've all had it drummed into us to be polite and helpful and that's something that predators use to lure us in...a la Ted Bundy's act with his arm in a sling to get women to assist him. They all fell for his act because they wanted to be helpful. When you feel that creepy feeling, your spidy senses (thanks Spider-Man)are tingling, get the he** out of there, don't worry about being rude or what anyone may think of you, and be prepared to fight your way out. Do not ever get in a car with them. Fight back with full intention of inflicting serious bodily harm to them. Give up your purse or wallet and RUN toward safety, even if they have a gun. It's really hard to hit a moving target with a pistol unless you are an expert shot. Better to get shot in the arm, or something, than to be found dead dumped in the woods which is where you will end up if you get in that car. Be smart and carry a charged cell phone. If you drive, you should have AAA or some other roadside assistance coverage. When you break down, stay in the car with the doors locked until police or the tow service arrives.
There was one time I ignored my "spidy sense" and let this teenager in my car for a ride home after visiting a mutual friend. He got me on an isolated road and put his hands around my throat and told me to pull over. I cursed at him like a sailor and told him he was going to die. I started driving like a maniac and fish tailed the car. He took his hands off of me and I was trying to find my great grandfathers night stick that I had next to the drivers seat on the floor. I couldn't get to it before I came upon two guys getting in their car. Talk about luck. It was after midnight. I think they may have been fishing. I slammed on the brakes and hit the horn which irritated them, and they got out of the car. I told them I needed help and the kid got out of the car and ran. They went after him and caught him. He begged me to take him back where I picked him up. Yeah, like that was going to happen. I thanked the guys for helping me and cursed him out again. He had to walk home in the cold with a light jacket on. You never know when crime will find you. It could be at the house of some one you know. Did that experience make me more aware of my surroundings? It sure did. To this day I still check my back seat before getting in my car. I've been doing it for over 30 years now.
i haven't read the whole thread. but it could also have something to do with how you were raised. i know growing up my parents instilled a little bit of "fear" in me and talked about how things could go wrong all the time and how i had to be "careful" doing things that normal people did all the time. whereas my sister in law has been on her own since she was 18 and didn't have strong parent figures in her life and she is the most free spirited person ever.
i remember my sister in law was travelling alone for work and she was telling my mom about how she went hiking on a trail in the day time by herself and my mom flipped out like how could she do that ALONE that's so DANGEROUS. and in that moment i realized why i am the way i am, and why my sister in law is the way she is lol. because i would have had my mom's voice in my head saying not to hike on the trail alone lol.
My mom has always been like that.. scared of her own shadow. She was always overprotective and told me what bad things could happen.. I don't know how I ended up so carefree lol. I told her once that I'll go jogging along the lake path at night with my earbuds in.. and she's like, "That's so dangerous! What if somebody sneaks up behind you and you can't hear them?" I told her there's always other people on the path and I've never felt threatened..
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