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The only way you're going to survive believing that romantic love is just a notion is if you are able to compartmentalize very well and be extra mindful about living in the present moment.
Another way, of which I was a very early adopter, is to disregard it completely, focus your time and energy on things you want to do and look back with a sense of accomplishment on a productive if solitary life.
The secret to avoiding repeats of history or even first time lapses in judgement is to consider all your friends' and family's mistakes and decide not to make them.
very well said. OP romance is something that people engage in to create loving relationships, that hopefully last a lifetime. without romance, we may as well have contract marriages that set the length of the marriage, the division of assets when the contract is up, or go back into negotiations to get a contract extension.
this contract would also determine what would happen if children are produced as a result of this marriage, such as who tales care of the kids, who supports them financially, etc.
the problem with contracts though is, it doesnt take into account emotions of any kind, and with children you cant eliminate emotions.
But aren't most marriages operated like a contract basis with mandatory family prenuptial and custodial contracts, esp. In the event of dissolution.
My grandma didn't believe in romantic love; and neither do the rest of my family. While they've all had experiences to account from, we've all come to the conclusion that it is just merely a tolerance threshold highlightened by our personal, subjective, at the time, perception of them. It rarely lasts an extended period of time.
From this belief, what is the point of romantic relationships other than wasting time? I can't understand why it would be fun after you've had x amount of relationships and everything about everyone is just a repeat of history.
I believe that it exists.
However it is not a reliable method to base a marriage.
The definition of romance is a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love. This is how one feels when we first become infatuated with someone. It usually evolves into something more comfortable and familiar as you spend more time together. No less wonderful, just less exciting and mysterious.
The definition of romance is a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love. This is how one feels when we first become infatuated with someone. It usually evolves into something more comfortable and familiar as you spend more time together. No less wonderful, just less exciting and mysterious.
Or it doesn't. I want to believe in romantic love--I want to very much. But I think that it's an illusion that lasts for about 2 years or however long it takes you to fall back into your old patterns and programming. The purpose of that illusion is to get you into bed with that person, just in case sex wasn't enough to get you there lol. And the beat goes on. . . . M. Scott Peck had some good things to say on this subject in The Road Less Traveled, but I keep in mind that everyone's opinion is tinged by their life experiences and so is mine.
But aren't most marriages operated like a contract basis with mandatory family prenuptial and custodial contracts, esp. In the event of dissolution.
some are no doubt. but for the most part, usually when two people fall in love, they marry with the intention of staying together for a lifetime. when things go wrong and a marriage is dissolved, its usually a judge that decides what the post marriage contract will be.
Or it doesn't. I want to believe in romantic love--I want to very much. But I think that it's an illusion that lasts for about 2 years or however long it takes you to fall back into your old patterns and programming. The purpose of that illusion is to get you into bed with that person, just in case sex wasn't enough to get you there lol. And the beat goes on. . . . M. Scott Peck had some good things to say on this subject in The Road Less Traveled, but I keep in mind that everyone's opinion is tinged by their life experiences and so is mine.
So long as a person is chasing the 'ideal' of falling they will be wind swept by each new partner, and not very stable.
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