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One of my thoughts while reading this is that kids have too much power if they are allowed to write complaints and affect your career. When I was a kid paddling was still allowed. The kids did what they were told, if they didn't they were either paddled or sent to the principal to get scolded or paddled. We had some good teachers and some mean ones. Some better than others. I can't even imagine being allowed to write a complaint about a teacher in my day as a student. It's preposterous.
Good luck, hope you find the solution to your situation.
Exactly! I never heard of such a thing as kids writing complaints and the administration considering letting a teacher go unless it was for something severe like inappropriate behavior. It sounds like at this school, if the kids don't like you because you're too strict or too whatever, they can write a letter and ruin your career? Ridiculous liberal crap.
I have worked with kids for over 10 years now. I was someone who always wanted the traditional- husband, family dog, 2-3 kids thing, but after working with kids, I wouldn't be heart broken to not have them. I work at an inner city elementary school. I feel more like a police officer than an educator. I see more kids who lie, are physically aggressive, bad attitudes, racist, than kids who are well adjusted. That being said I still try to build relationships with them. I'm worried that if ever I had kids that they may end up like many of the kids that I work with. Many people say people are the product of their environment, but I'm starting to think that maybe nature holds more weight than nurture the more that I work with kids. I guess what I'm trying to say is if I were to have kids, I would worry more about how they are overall are like vs. me losing my freedom/having my life change. I also think I would be miserable if I had to come home to a child with severe behavior problems. I would feel like I don't like my kid and that I hate my life.
Needless to say I'm leaning towards more not having kids. I also have no love prospects so that doesn't help . I would only consider having a kid if I was in a committed marriage.
I have worked with kids for over 10 years now. I was someone who always wanted the traditional- husband, family dog, 2-3 kids thing, but after working with kids, I wouldn't be heart broken to not have them. I work at an inner city elementary school. I feel more like a police officer than an educator. I see more kids who lie, are physically aggressive, bad attitudes, racist, than kids who are well adjusted. That being said I still try to build relationships with them. I'm worried that if ever I had kids that they may end up like many of the kids that I work with. Many people say people are the product of their environment, but I'm starting to think that maybe nature holds more weight than nurture the more that I work with kids. I guess what I'm trying to say is if I were to have kids, I would worry more about how they are overall are like vs. me losing my freedom/having my life change. I also think I would be miserable if I had to come home to a child with severe behavior problems. I would feel like I don't like my kid and that I hate my life.
Naw, I think you know all the things that can go wrong, and are knowledgeable and smart enough to make a good parent.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CatsinSnow
Needless to say I'm leaning towards more not having kids. I also have no love prospects so that doesn't help. I would only consider having a kid if I was in a committed marriage.
Yes, of course only in a committed marriage. I even know why you said that, because many if not most of the problem children came from broken families, right? (Single parent households.)
You'll do fine if you have children, and I'm sure you will recognize the importance that it takes two loving parents to create good children, and that during their early lives they need a parent around, not a nanny. Not being sexist I'll just say that either you or spouse or alternately must plan on being house parent(s) during the children's formative years.
My father always worked. My mother was stay-at-home until I was about 15 and then she went on to a very successful career; she was very smart! Myself, I was busy from end of school until my parents got home, studying, doing my homework.
It just occurred to me I'm still like that these days. I want to get all my work over before dinner so that I can have my evenings to enjoy. It's funny I only now had that insight!
I have worked with kids for over 10 years now. I was someone who always wanted the traditional- husband, family dog, 2-3 kids thing, but after working with kids, I wouldn't be heart broken to not have them. I work at an inner city elementary school. I feel more like a police officer than an educator. I see more kids who lie, are physically aggressive, bad attitudes, racist, than kids who are well adjusted. That being said I still try to build relationships with them. I'm worried that if ever I had kids that they may end up like many of the kids that I work with. Many people say people are the product of their environment, but I'm starting to think that maybe nature holds more weight than nurture the more that I work with kids. I guess what I'm trying to say is if I were to have kids, I would worry more about how they are overall are like vs. me losing my freedom/having my life change. I also think I would be miserable if I had to come home to a child with severe behavior problems. I would feel like I don't like my kid and that I hate my life.
Needless to say I'm leaning towards more not having kids. I also have no love prospects so that doesn't help . I would only consider having a kid if I was in a committed marriage.
Agreed. My friend has a few kids, and she was very worried about sending them to public school, because she didn't want her kids exposed to bad influences. She's planning to homeschool them when she gets a chance. I think it's a terrible decision, seeing as she's a single parent. I've encouraged her to get back in school; she's really smart and talented and could go far with a degree, but to each their own, I guess.
Once upon a time, I was considering playing with fire by adopting foster kids, but I'm totally against the idea at this time. It would be like working at the detention center 24/7 possibly. It's a romantic idea that I could have some positive change in their lives, but I'm beginning to think that's not really reality.
I don't think kids sense anything other than the end of class bell ringing.
I think it's parents who smell blood in the water. These days parents are capable of smelling blood in the 1 ppm range.
I take back what I said in my first line above. I had not given sufficient thought before posting. I believe my later post corrects this misstatement.
I was thinking of MY school days. I wasn't interested in tormenting teachers so I made the illogical leap that the way I felt must be typical. It isn't.
Also, back in the day parents and teachers worked together. I sense that in today's climate parents would rather blame teachers for their childrens' problems rather than placing the blame where it often lies, in the parents themselves. They would rather blame teachers and school than admit their own failures.
There is also a feeling of entitlement going around; thus the stupid awards given merely for participation, thus the concept of social advancement (student fails a grade but is advanced anyway because they want to keep age groups together). What you end up with is a courtesy diploma that itself is nothing more than an "also participated" award, and a good excuse to quit spending taxpayer money trying to educate those who are not educable.
The stupidest, biggest discipline problem students go on to careers in professional crime.
I think that it is interesting that you add at the very end of this post (and others) that you have ASD. It is probably the root of all of you problems, yet you treat it like it is an afterthought. You've been advised to seek counseling many, many times. Maybe the reason you don't is because you don't seem to see the real issue as the real issue. Learn some skills to overcome your autism symptoms, and all aspects of your life will improve. You don't seem to be willing to do that.
Really? Really??? That's your advice? That's the best you can come up with, huh?
This OP has been lamenting about their job and issues with children for a long time. Yet, she hasn't done anything to make her situation better. I addressed the issue as listed in the thread title.
Agreed. My friend has a few kids, and she was very worried about sending them to public school, because she didn't want her kids exposed to bad influences. She's planning to homeschool them when she gets a chance. I think it's a terrible decision, seeing as she's a single parent. I've encouraged her to get back in school; she's really smart and talented and could go far with a degree, but to each their own, I guess.
Once upon a time, I was considering playing with fire by adopting foster kids, but I'm totally against the idea at this time. It would be like working at the detention center 24/7 possibly. It's a romantic idea that I could have some positive change in their lives, but I'm beginning to think that's not really reality.
I could never do this.Like with what you are saying, typically foster kids have severe behavior problems.
Also I didn't mean to sound like public schools are bad. To me though if I had kids and only had the option of having them go to schools that were a bit "rough", I would try to see if I could afford a private school or something. To me I would want any kids of mine to go to a school where kids actually know how to be a student and make effort instead of just acting like many of the kids that I work with. My "favorite" line is when a student says that their parent/s tell them that they can hit/kick/push someone because it's self defense. Most of the parents of the kids that I work with actually teach their kids that if any one is mean to you, simply get physical with them. I have to actually teach them what self defense is and they act like I have no idea what I'm talking about. One administrator at my school has said something a lot which is sad but true- criminals were kids once.... I really hope that most of the kids that I work with don't end up as criminals but based on their patterns, I would be more shocked if they were to end up getting a good job and contribute something positive to society. The stories I have would shock people especially after knowing that I work at an elementary school!
This OP has been lamenting about their job and issues with children for a long time. Yet, she hasn't done anything to make her situation better. I addressed the issue as listed in the thread title.
Hmm, I suppose you did in undiplomatic terms. Perhaps it came across differently than you intended.
Exactly! I never heard of such a thing as kids writing complaints and the administration considering letting a teacher go unless it was for something severe like inappropriate behavior. It sounds like at this school, if the kids don't like you because you're too strict or too whatever, they can write a letter and ruin your career? Ridiculous liberal crap.
Important point that I left out of my post. I didn't mean to sound as if children shouldn't speak up to their parents or school administrators if there's a serious issue. Only that kids have been given way too much power. They aren't in charge.
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