Absolutely Atrocious (woman, husband, marriage, people)

[ExNooYawk2]

My sister has had a friend since childhood who is now in her early 50s. She is a sweet woman who does beautiful artwork. She has never been into drugs or anything self-destructive. She is into her third unhappy marriage, which is unfortunate. Her childhood was not happy at all - her mother started putting hairpieces on her and mascara at age 4. She was like Cinderella, doing all the chores in the house and being told that her brother was more important than she was.

Here's the thing.

For such a nice person, she looks absolutely atrocious. More makeup than Tammy-Faye Baker (remember her?), Dolly-Parton style hair, slutty clothes stretching over her enhanced boobs, shoes, etc. She has looked like this for years. People take an instant dislike to her because of her street-walker appearance.

She has two very nice kids, was a good and attentive mother and doesn't go around picking up strange men, or any men. She is a faithful wife and met her husbands through friends.

She is aware that her appearance puts people off but is unlikely to change it. What makes a person do that? Is there any hope that someone might get through to her that her 'real' appearance is what is important, rather than the blonde, VampirA-like image she cultivates?

Sad.

[Londoncowboy30]

Originally Posted by ExNooYawk2

My sister has had a friend since childhood who is now in her early 50s. She is a sweet woman who does beautiful artwork. She has never been into drugs or anything self-destructive. She is into her third unhappy marriage, which is unfortunate. Her childhood was not happy at all - her mother started putting hairpieces on her and mascara at age 4. She was like Cinderella, doing all the chores in the house and being told that her brother was more important than she was.

Here's the thing.

For such a nice person, she looks absolutely atrocious. More makeup than Tammy-Faye Baker (remember her?), Dolly-Parton style hair, slutty clothes stretching over her enhanced boobs, shoes, etc. She has looked like this for years. People take an instant dislike to her because of her street-walker appearance.

She has two very nice kids, was a good and attentive mother and doesn't go around picking up strange men, or any men. She is a faithful wife and met her husbands through friends.

She is aware that her appearance puts people off but is unlikely to change it. What makes a person do that? Is there any hope that someone might get through to her that her 'real' appearance is what is important, rather than the blonde, VampirA-like image she cultivates?

Sad.

Showing her this post might help!

But seriously she does sound a lovely woman and being married 3 times and X amount of previous love interests etc she cant be that repulsive to look at

As for not changing it why would she? Everyone can't physically attract or please everyone else so me personally I admire the fact she's doing exactly what SHE wants and not " following the crowd " many others tend to

Think about it I'm sure everyones been ( overly ) criticised for their appearance at some point no? I mean who cares what strangers think?

[silibran]

I suspect that how she dresses reflects how she sees herself. Her self image is fixed. Changing her self image would hard for her to do.

Ultimately, we do get to choose how we present ourselves to the world.

And her makeup and costumey way of dressing might also serve as a mask which she finds comforting to wear in public,

I do not think it would be easy for her to change.