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Old 06-30-2017, 07:19 PM
 
892 posts, read 1,421,167 times
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I know a person who is extremely proud of "telling it like it is", always interjecting late into conversations with the "perfect solution" and just generally never even considers that she could be wrong once in her life.


It is exhausting to be around someone who believes that they "tell it like it is" and whatever they say is correct no matter the subject because they "tell it like it is" and that is the end of it.


I tried to explain that maybe sometimes "telling it like it is" is really just that person's interpretation of the situation and it may not be "like it is".......Obviously it didn't work.


What the hell is up with these people? Do they really believe that whatever comes out of their mouths is they "way it is" ???????


Is it a complete lack of self awareness or what?
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Old 06-30-2017, 07:49 PM
 
Location: Southern California
28,796 posts, read 11,581,172 times
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I think so much is working to bring others down. Makes them feel superior when they bring others down, very immature and insecure.

I have strong opinions but when someone has their opinions and ways to do whatever I let it go. Some here on a group I spend a lot of time are relentless on attacking some other's ways of doing and thinking. Maybe this is similar to what you mean. I don't work on changing anyone, but I do put out OPTIONS and alternatives.

Last edited by jaminhealth; 06-30-2017 at 08:58 PM..
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Old 07-01-2017, 12:20 AM
 
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Seems like possibly a lack of imagination, as well. If a person can't put themselves in the shoes of another, they tend to be very black and white in their problem-solving, I find. If it works for them, it should work for every other person. Life requires compromise and looking at things from other perspectives. If they're lacking those skills, I could see how they'd think, "it's my way or the highway." I tend to avoid people like that, too. It's frustrating and it's not likely that you'll be able to convince them to see things in any other way, so it's also a waste of time and energy most often.
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Old 07-01-2017, 12:25 AM
 
Location: Middle America
37,418 posts, read 46,230,930 times
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I'm always somewhat bemused by the expression.

When people say they're "telling it like it is," what they really mean is that they don't feel the need to exercise diplomacy when expressing their opinion, particularly if they know it's going to offend/upset/cause conflict, etc. It's always interesting to me when people assert that their opinions are, of course, not opinions at all, but some sort of definitive "how things ARE." Rather presumptuous.
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Old 07-01-2017, 06:46 AM
 
Location: The Triad (NC)
31,375 posts, read 69,780,396 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by D-R-B View Post
...and just generally never even considers that she could be wrong once in her life.
Is she wrong very often?
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Old 07-01-2017, 08:52 AM
 
Location: Wooster, Ohio
1,866 posts, read 1,164,045 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
I'm always somewhat bemused by the expression.

When people say they're "telling it like it is," what they really mean is that they don't feel the need to exercise diplomacy when expressing their opinion, particularly if they know it's going to offend/upset/cause conflict, etc. It's always interesting to me when people assert that their opinions are, of course, not opinions at all, but some sort of definitive "how things ARE." Rather presumptuous.
My experience with these people is that while they happily criticize every aspect of your life (your taste in food, music, etc.), they tend to be rather thin-skinned about even the mildest criticism of their own lives. They also seem to be personally threatened by other people's achievements, such as promotions, education, etc. It's probably best to just distance yourself as much as possible from them.
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Old 07-01-2017, 09:56 AM
 
Location: Southern Ontario
439 posts, read 502,274 times
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Yes--put distance and disregard everything they say with an amused expression on your face. People 'expressing' themselves are usually not worth listening to, but, if you are stuck and cant get away, just smile at them as you would someone speaking a foreign language.
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Old 07-01-2017, 10:43 AM
 
14,331 posts, read 15,471,035 times
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As soon as someone is described (or self-described) as "telling it like it is," they automatically are taken down a notch in my estimation and must do something to prove to me they're not a complete douchebag. There's clarity, and then there's being a human wrecking ball.
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Old 07-01-2017, 11:48 AM
 
4,257 posts, read 3,790,841 times
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People who tell it like it is don't bother me. They are harmless. You don't have to mind read to figure out what they are thinking. I may not always agree, but I appreciate that they were willing to put themselves out there. I'm more bothered by the person who will not speak up. That is the person who will take what another person says and will use it to stab them in the back. People who tell it like it is aren't hiding something.
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Old 07-01-2017, 12:02 PM
 
Location: Southern California
28,796 posts, read 11,581,172 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicci6Squirrels View Post
Seems like possibly a lack of imagination, as well. If a person can't put themselves in the shoes of another, they tend to be very black and white in their problem-solving, I find. If it works for them, it should work for every other person. Life requires compromise and looking at things from other perspectives. If they're lacking those skills, I could see how they'd think, "it's my way or the highway." I tend to avoid people like that, too. It's frustrating and it's not likely that you'll be able to convince them to see things in any other way, so it's also a waste of time and energy most often.

Exactly black and white thinking...never think out of the box, but who knows they could be fabricating a lot too to make them right. Plus some of these have special interests in their thinking, their paychecks.

Something like the red states and blue states thinking on politics. Another topic but along the same lines. I give my opinions and let the rest yell and scream.
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