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I really do look like a teenager, everyone says it and I feel incredibly embarrassed. It's not just the very young face but the build I have as well, I have a boyish body.
Almost all women feel disappointed in their looks. So very few of us meet the perceived beauty standards of popular culture. Believe me, there are fuller figured women who would love to have your body shape.
The good thing about being you, is that you will probably look 35 when you are almost 50. You do have that to look forward to.
I am going to suggest that you concentrate on dressing less casual, and somewhat sophisticated. Do experiment with makeup. I think if you look polished you will look older, and certainly more sophisticated. With your body, you can wear things that models wear. There will always be things on the sale rack for you. Emphasize your good parts, and carry yourself proudly.
I am guessing from your post that you are worried because you haven't found a partner or had a child. I do not know what is going on in your life, but because you are distressed about this, talk about this to someone who is sympathetic. If you don't have a trustworthy friend, find a counselor to help you know how to think about your disappointment. I suspect your unhappiness over your life has carried over into your interactions and how you present yourself.
One of the things most women have to learn is how to emphasize what is good about ourselves, and to de-emphasize what isn't considered great. I agree about bras that make the most of what you have. Buy one for yourself.
I don't want kids, not biological ones but I do worry about being single at 32 which I see as way too old to be single and worry people see me as a loser for it.
I don't want kids, not biological ones but I do worry about being single at 32 which I see as way too old to be single and worry people see me as a loser for it.
People aren't seeing you as a "loser", OP; don't burden yourself with that self-talk. I don't know what part of the US you live in, as this can vary regionally, but it's extremely common for women to be single at 32, in some parts of the country. The entire West Coast, for one, except for a few rural/small town backwaters.
Do you get out much, and try to meet people through common activities, like hobby groups, sports (volleyball, hiking, tennis clubs), volunteering, and the like? The advantage there is that people can get to know you over time, which means not only will they learn your age, but they'll also get to know and appreciate your personality. It will take time to find someone you click with, but regularly-scheduled activities like that can be a good way to make friends and find a partner.
I don't want kids, not biological ones but I do worry about being single at 32 which I see as way too old to be single and worry people see me as a loser for it.
Out of curiosity, where are you from? Because where I grew up most people don't even start considering marriage until their late 20s/early 30s. I got married at 35. Trust me, it's not over for you at 32. You're definitely not a loser.
I am 32 and constantly get told I look 17/18. I am small built, almost flat chested and have a very young face.
1. Would you find this freak like?
2. Would you also be surprised to hear this woman is single with no kids and still looks like a teen?
I hate how I look. I see women my age or a couple years older who look old enough to be my mom or at least 10-15 years older. I worry there is something wrong with me. I never feel like I belong within my peer group as I don't look like them or have their lives. It feels horrible and disorientating. Like I am not in the right body or something.
Don't worry about it. This, too, will pass (and you might miss it when it does.)
I've dealt with this my whole life since childhood. Didn't stop getting carded till I was over 40.
When I was 19, a boy about 12 or 13 years old rode his StingRay next to me and invited me to "Hop on." When I declined, he became quite insistent for a few moments. I kept shaking my head No, and it finally dawned on me that he thought I was a girl his age! Fast forward to when I was about 50 years old. A couple of women and a guy, all maybe 18-20 yrs old, were walking by when I was putting away some stuff at a beach. They asked me to take a photo of them, which I did. The guy was ogling me (still wearing a wetsuit) and blurted out, "You're the one we should be taking a photo of!" I tried not to let my jaw drop at his foolish grin. Probably the young ladies gave him some crap later on!
When I was 19 it was a little weird, almost annoying. But when I was 50, I was glad. You will probably hear from other older woman who tell you the same thing.
The only situation that really made me angry was at a workplace where the typical employee was a white male over age 50, and not one who had lived or worked in more diverse environments, either. Many of them assumed I was fresh out of college just because I was new to that company. I was 40 years old and had worked in another pseudo-military-cultured job as well as other places, but never had I been treated as patronizingly as at this company. They would actually say things like, "You kids..."
And then they complained that new hires who were young quit after only one year. Gee, I wonder why... Maybe it's like the manager I heard telling somebody that they were going to dump forced overtime on the young engineers because "they're cheap" to pay and they don't have a (family) life, so obviously they have NO life except work!
But really, other than dealing with old-before-their-time farts like these, enjoy looking younger than you are. It will be all too soon before the gray or white hairs, the sags, and the ailing joints and shrinking muscles have you wishing for those days again.
OK, this might sound stupid, but bear with me...are you WANTING to look more mature? Cause there's ways to get there.
You can wear push up bras, or stuff your bras
You can have breast enhancement surgery (I realize that's an expensive and painful thing...but it's out there as an option.)
If you're trying to get guys to notice you as a woman, wear things that show off your stomach, waist, hips, etc.
Wear heels, when appropriate. It'll make your legs look longer, more shapely, and it pushes your butt up.
Wear make-up, if you don't already.
I've seen men hit on 13 year olds because 13 year olds dressed like 21 yr. olds. If you want to, it's possible to get men to notice you.
Many - in my opinion, too many - teenage girls do a bunch of those things. They would get her more male attention, but she wouldn't be treated much differently by non-creepy older adults.
I would find 32-looks-18 freakish, to be honest. If anything, with the recommended noticed-by-guys clothing, I'd find that age-inappropriate and unseemly. Probably fancy, fairly conservative clothing and accessories would at least add some years. In conjunction with makeup and hair, that might attract some men.
It's not easy for full-fledged adults who don't look much like adults. I doubt there has ever been a person in that situation who liked it much of the time.
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