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Good read: Meditation by Eknath Easwaran, very deep and not the meditation most people think of as introspection. He more focuses on your will and addressing your depth of consciousness. Worthwhile.
I am a more independent person as I thought I will ever be or had ever planned or had wanted to be. Which is good but also sucks.
Very loyal but impatient
very funny but not everyone agrees and I dont actually know any jokes
was supposed to be a boy and often act and think like one despite dressing feminine
Not afraid to fight but the most physical peaceful person you'll ever meet
A person that apparently always gets noticed and remembered even though I stay in the background and don't speak much
Finally reached an age where sex is not in my thoughts 24/7 but has been replaced by obsessively thinking of what I am going to eat next and how it will affect my body
Always trying to improve mentally and physically but having a hard time following through consistently
I walk through fire for people I love
If someone says "You can't ..." I will prove you otherwise even if it costs me a leg
I intimidate men by my presence apparently but when I get them to talk, they find me "surprisingly" kind and caring.
Never been depressed or anxious and have a hard time finding empathy for people with a victim mentality
I realized my real height just a few years ago when I adjusted the spinning bike saddle at the gym and almost ran out of holes.
Everyone says I am crazy for going to the gym and doing MMA almost every day but I am single, so what else am I supposed to do?? Sit at home and knit?
This thread just has me thinking about all of the ways in which people try to define ourselves.
I've ruminated on that thing, of how as a child I was taught to never brag, "nobody likes someone who toots their own horn." Or, "so you think you're better than us, just because..." So you get a few messages like that, and I think we start to erase our own positive perceptions of the self, in favor of only what others can give us.
Like, yes, I think I am a talented artist, but that is not valid if no one is paying for my art. I cannot SAY that. I cannot BE that unless it's given to me by other people.
I used to get frustrated and annoyed, when meeting new groups of people in professional settings, we would go around a circle, and it was always, "Tell us your name, and something interesting about yourself" and every woman's "something interesting" was invariably her marital status, and number of pets and/or kids that she had.
"I am Barb Smith and these are the people and animals that I serve, who depend on me. Thank you."
The men, though, would more often share their professional credentials, and hobbies. And I just cannot accept that what a man does is interesting, and women's only function is to serve their families (especially when I know better.) In one such meeting, I actually got fed up. We were introducing ourselves to a few new hires, it was pretty informal, so before we began, I said, "This time, can we NOT share anything about our family composition, marital status, or pets....tell us all something interesting about YOU." Because I KNEW that one of them likes to cross stitch photo-realistic replicas of classic paintings. And another one races hot rods. And another of the ladies has horses. And they take joy and pride in these things.
Yet somehow we have been programmed to shrink ourselves. To hide what makes us awesome. And to define ourselves by our roles.
Barb Smith, been married to Joe for 28 years, have two kids and one grandbaby. Also mom to three dogs. All rescues!
Well...I guess, if that is what matters, she can rest assured it's all that will remain of her once she has passed away, within a few generations, she'll be nothing but a name and some basic vital statistics, and her position in the family tree relative to her relatives. As I mentioned in my first post on this thread, I've never quite been content with that.
LOL...is even astrology nothing but an attempt to find a way to self-describe? Numerology? Meyers-Briggs? Love Languages?
Are we, as my Mom says, "the sum total of our life experiences?" Are we defined by what we love and hate, like and dislike? By our gender, identity, and sexual orientation? By our fashion choices? By our age, our generation? By our religion or ethnic origins? Are we all of these things or none? And why does it feel like it matters so very much to ask these questions? Maybe because we are social animals and we need to work out how we fit with our fellow humans, continuously...
This thread just has me thinking about all of the ways in which people try to define ourselves.
I've ruminated on that thing, of how as a child I was taught to never brag, "nobody likes someone who toots their own horn." Or, "so you think you're better than us, just because..." So you get a few messages like that, and I think we start to erase our own positive perceptions of the self, in favor of only what others can give us.
Like, yes, I think I am a talented artist, but that is not valid if no one is paying for my art. I cannot SAY that. I cannot BE that unless it's given to me by other people.
I used to get frustrated and annoyed, when meeting new groups of people in professional settings, we would go around a circle, and it was always, "Tell us your name, and something interesting about yourself" and every woman's "something interesting" was invariably her marital status, and number of pets and/or kids that she had.
"I am Barb Smith and these are the people and animals that I serve, who depend on me. Thank you."
The men, though, would more often share their professional credentials, and hobbies. And I just cannot accept that what a man does is interesting, and women's only function is to serve their families (especially when I know better.) In one such meeting, I actually got fed up. We were introducing ourselves to a few new hires, it was pretty informal, so before we began, I said, "This time, can we NOT share anything about our family composition, marital status, or pets....tell us all something interesting about YOU." Because I KNEW that one of them likes to cross stitch photo-realistic replicas of classic paintings. And another one races hot rods. And another of the ladies has horses. And they take joy and pride in these things.
Yet somehow we have been programmed to shrink ourselves. To hide what makes us awesome. And to define ourselves by our roles.
Barb Smith, been married to Joe for 28 years, have two kids and one grandbaby. Also mom to three dogs. All rescues!
Well...I guess, if that is what matters, she can rest assured it's all that will remain of her once she has passed away, within a few generations, she'll be nothing but a name and some basic vital statistics, and her position in the family tree relative to her relatives. As I mentioned in my first post on this thread, I've never quite been content with that.
LOL...is even astrology nothing but an attempt to find a way to self-describe? Numerology? Meyers-Briggs? Love Languages?
Are we, as my Mom says, "the sum total of our life experiences?" Are we defined by what we love and hate, like and dislike? By our gender, identity, and sexual orientation? By our fashion choices? By our age, our generation? By our religion or ethnic origins? Are we all of these things or none? And why does it feel like it matters so very much to ask these questions? Maybe because we are social animals and we need to work out how we fit with our fellow humans, continuously...
We are a part of a continuum - to define ourselves is practically impossible, cause words cannot describe our lives well or precisely enough and yet here I am trying.
I am Panos and I'm here to have fun. I'm also here to inevitably get angry and sad. I hate those things and yet without them I would be someone else, so I also kind of love them, cause they shape who I am.
I am the Panos that is just and the Panos that forgets that justice is sometimes a matter of perspective.
I am going to study Psychology and I will probably struggle to lose some weight too.
Our whole existence is so incredibly fragile and kind of satirical I guess.
Nothing can really shrink us. We are who we are. The gay guy that wants to find a partner for life. The shy person, that believes that she needs the acknowledgement of others in order to be a great artist - when in reality you don't need to be great. And if you are, it isn't always acknowledged. Barb Smith, not just a name and some basic vital statistics - a ripple in time, inevitably changing the future.
I am quite content with it, but at times also kind of melancholic
I agree with your mom, Sonic. I think it's important to have fun in this life. And life is not fun always. Some people don't have the sheer luck to be able to be having this conversation, and one of the reasons I like having these philosophical discussions, is that it keeps me grounded and connected to everyone else.
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