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I don't want to alarm you but this sounds like a really scary scenario to me, involving some serious mental health issues. Sometimes people don't perceive it this way, but if you think about it, anyone threatening suicide is really threatening murder. Self-murder, to be sure, but murder nonetheless. And I believe it's actually illegal.
It's not my place to advise you, but if it were me I'd get out of that situation IMMEDIATELY. You could get killed.
He is depressed though and having a hard time. it's hard for me to completely focus on the fact that I feel disrespected.
How do i solve this? How do i get him help?
Look at your description of this man. He is an adolescent. Just imagine what he'll be like after a few years of marriage. You will be supporting him, he will be bitching you out for all sins real and imagined, and life will be a depressed unrealized-dreams hell.
He is a loser. Your job is YOU. He needs to get real. He will not do that until a major crisis hits.
Ditch him. Get out while the getting is good. I hope he's not the type to consider or attempt to harm you. "If I can't have you, nobody will!" He's one sick puppy. You can't fix him. Get out.
He is depressed though and having a hard time. it's hard for me to completely focus on the fact that I feel disrespected.
How do i solve this? How do i get him help?
Call a local suicide hotline ,they will listen and give you some practical steps and referrals. The bottom line is you can’t solve it, nor is it your responsibility but you can seek professional support.
Forgive me but how did you ever reach the stage of becoming engaged to such a selfish dead-beat loser?
In my book his parents are also losers for not having the stones to shake him up and read him the riot act instead of enabling his lazy ass......
Still gets the car that his parents purchased for him detailed ?......what a piece of sh$t
Time for you to smarten up and leave this dead-beat. Leave him for his enabling parents to baby and save your own sanity and life.
Maybe he has austism and has never been diagnosed. There are millions of parents who try their best but still can’t motivate their child to just snap out of it. Sometimes these conditions are real, and medication and therapy is neeeded. If she doesn’t love him then she should leave him. His parents need to step in and help him. They may need help too. Maybe they tried for years to help him. Let’s not assume terrible things about people we never met.
Maybe he has austism and has never been diagnosed. There are millions of parentsts who try their best but still can’t motivate their child to just snap out of it. Sometimes these conditions are real, and medication and therapy is neeeded. If she doesn’t love him then she should leave him. His parents need to step in and help him. They may need help too. Maybe they tried for years to help him. Let’s not assume terrible things about people we never met.
Yep, not a fan of blame the parents mantra, we are talking about an adult not a child. Parents can raise two three or four children the same and yet one might develop a mental health issue in there 20 or 30’s or mix with the wrong people etc. trying to find a balance to help, support a family member with severe depression is a nightmare and as frustrating for them as the op.
Usually people who go around threatening to kill thenselves rarely do it. Those who really do it stay quiet about it.
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A bit harash I’d Say.
