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Especially with people who reiterate or rephrase the same idea over and over again. They are thinking faster than the other person is speaking.
That's a good point. It probably depends upon what social and educational level your friends are in, but most of the people I know just repeat what they heard on NPR (which is what they read in the Seattle Times, saw on CNN and MSNBC etc), and within a few seconds you know what they are going to go on and on about.
If it's personal, rather than a social/political issue, most people have a broken record of complaints or brags, and nothing you say will change their script.
I agree with the original poster, however, that it is very rude. When I get interrupted, I just drop the subject, and if the interupter notices, and says, "What were you going to say?" I just shrug my shoulders and say I don't remember.
My daughter taught me that - after a few times of her refusing to continue her contributions, I became much more aware of my pattern of interruption, and consciously started retraining myself.
I've encountered people in the past that when conversing with me definitely don't listen to what my present sentence or last sentences are about. They focus on whatever in their universe is most prevalent to them at that moment even off of supposed present topic we are on. It is getting more in use now days and has been creeping into site forums the last couple years and yes I have did this also on them. I do try not to do this and do try to read the previously posted.This leads me to keep my conversations with new people short or with ones I've known to do this in the past.
My second is while I'm talking and someone interrupts me in mid sentence blurting something. To me this happening twice in a conversation ends my end of it and to add in my upbringing that is the highest form of disrespect for the other person you can have. It just was never done by another person where we lived. Now mix both these in a conversation and I almost run the other way when I see these people coming towards me.
I've also encountered people who monologue on and on without any natural breaks or attempts to have a dialogue. Eventually you have to interrupt them. Some people write like this too.
This is true, but it is still rude, imo, and doesn't make it right or acceptable (and I am not saying that you think such behavior is okay, Parnassia).
Yes. I should have finished the thought. I also meant to suggest that people interrupting others as they speak is incredibly common in everyday life. You can't escape it so you have to live with it. Even people you like probably do it sometimes. One solution certainly might be to drop them out of your life but you would run out of people. Sure it's rude, but it is ubiquitous. If someone does it to me often, one thing I've learned to do is check what I am saying to them. I might be triggering it by repeating myself...something people do almost as often.
Communication is becoming a lost art. People lost the ability to speak their thoughts and ideas clearly and other have lost the ability to listen to the verbal and nonverbal communications of the speaker. I sometimes have to get my wife to get to the point because she drifts off on a tangent. Sometimes I have her repeat what she’s trying to tell me and I repeat back to her what I believed I heard her trying to say. Sometimes the words she uses isn’t exactly what she meant to say. It’s time consuming but it helps to eliminate miscommunications.
I wish some people would record themselves talking and play it back for themselves to recognize things they’re doing wrong and work to change. Cut out all the cursing, stop using “like” over and over again, stop ending sentences with an emphasis making it sound like you’re asking a question, and stop mumbling your words. Speak one word completely before speaking the next word.
Communication is becoming a lost art. People lost the ability to speak their thoughts and ideas clearly and other have lost the ability to listen to the verbal and nonverbal communications of the speaker. I sometimes have to get my wife to get to the point because she drifts off on a tangent. Sometimes I have her repeat what she’s trying to tell me and I repeat back to her what I believed I heard her trying to say. Sometimes the words she uses isn’t exactly what she meant to say. It’s time consuming but it helps to eliminate miscommunications.
I wish some people would record themselves talking and play it back for themselves to recognize things they’re doing wrong and work to change. Cut out all the cursing, stop using “like” over and over again, stop ending sentences with an emphasis making it sound like you’re asking a question, and stop mumbling your words. Speak one word completely before speaking the next word.
There has also always been the problem of people living too much in their heads, so they fail to express their thoughts completely. Then they don't understand why there were misunderstandings, or why others don't respond as expected. This has nothing to do with over dependence on technology, and everything to do with psychology and learned (or failure to learn) communication skills.
One of the things I was taught early on in the military was every conversation consists of three things -- a sender, the message, and the receiver. At a low level all the focus was on the sender -- how they speak, avoiding repetition, etc -- and the message -- actually saying the right things. At a deeper level though the listener comes into play. Actively listening to what is being said and paying attention. Too often the listener is where communication breaks down because they are jumping ahead, assuming what you are saying, or forming their own response to what they think you are going to say, before you finish the sentence.
I know folks like that and talking to them is very frustrating. Always jumping ahead and interjecting something completely irrelevant to the topic. Then after they've derailed the entire conversation they claim you're being rude because you don't bother trying to thread back to where you were before they went down fourteen rabbit trails.
One of the things I was taught early on in the military was every conversation consists of three things -- a sender, the message, and the receiver. At a low level all the focus was on the sender -- how they speak, avoiding repetition, etc -- and the message -- actually saying the right things. At a deeper level though the listener comes into play. Actively listening to what is being said and paying attention. Too often the listener is where communication breaks down because they are jumping ahead, assuming what you are saying, or forming their own response to what they think you are going to say, before you finish the sentence.
I know folks like that and talking to them is very frustrating. Always jumping ahead and interjecting something completely irrelevant to the topic. Then after they've derailed the entire conversation they claim you're being rude because you don't bother trying to thread back to where you were before they went down fourteen rabbit trails.
When did you meet my wife?
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