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You know it's not normal. Obviously it's not normal. If it were normal, you would not be here talking about it in this way. But it seems to be HER normal.
Thing about that is, people don't change unless they want to change. If they want it badly enough, they seek out the resources, get therapy or whatever they need to fix their own heads, and pursue different outcomes. If they are capable of taking responsibility for their own lives, which sadly, many seem not to be. But anyone who can't or won't, is just gonna stay stuck in whatever unhappy trip they are on. It's not anything that anyone could fix by telling your sister what she's doing wrong.
This is a message board and I’m asking about her. This isn’t about me. I just want opinion on her and if you think it’s normal.
She is your sister. What does it matter what our opinions on her? You didn't even ask if it was "normal". Obviously it's her normal and she's living her life on her terms, even if it appears mercurial.
I am curious though. Are you jealous that people "fall at her feet"? Sounds like she's engaging enough a person that people respond to her, but this doesn't guarantee an easy or stable love life. Maybe she doesn't want that?
Jealous? Not at all. It’s all on the surface. She’s gone through so many friends that she just decides she doesn’t like anymore. Some people she has blown off or not responded to for years and they still worship her though. That I don’t get.
Jealous? Not at all. It’s all on the surface. She’s gone through so many friends that she just decides she doesn’t like anymore. Some people she has blown off or not responded to for years and they still worship her though. That I don’t get.
It's actually pretty common for people with certain personality disorders or other issues to be very charming and be able to maintain a surface image, but if you interact closely with them over time, you are then exposed to the ugly stuff. That is why people who don't know her well are enthusiastic about her, they fall in love with an image she's maintaining. And why she cannot maintain strong and healthy longterm connections, which is a combination of people getting wise to and sick of her BS, and her deeply knowing that she will hurt and disappoint people, and cutting them off before it can happen.
Those people who still worship her when she's blown them off...it is BECAUSE she hasn't had a ton of invested interaction with them, they still just love the image, not the person.
It's actually pretty common for people with certain personality disorders or other issues to be very charming and be able to maintain a surface image, but if you interact closely with them over time, you are then exposed to the ugly stuff. That is why people who don't know her well are enthusiastic about her, they fall in love with an image she's maintaining. And why she cannot maintain strong and healthy longterm connections, which is a combination of people getting wise to and sick of her BS, and her deeply knowing that she will hurt and disappoint people, and cutting them off before it can happen.
Those people who still worship her when she's blown them off...it is BECAUSE she hasn't had a ton of invested interaction with them, they still just love the image, not the person.
Good analysis. She does have 2 good friends from childhood but she doesn’t spend a lot of time with them.
It's actually pretty common for people with certain personality disorders or other issues to be very charming and be able to maintain a surface image, but if you interact closely with them over time, you are then exposed to the ugly stuff. That is why people who don't know her well are enthusiastic about her, they fall in love with an image she's maintaining. And why she cannot maintain strong and healthy longterm connections, which is a combination of people getting wise to and sick of her BS, and her deeply knowing that she will hurt and disappoint people, and cutting them off before it can happen.
Those people who still worship her when she's blown them off...it is BECAUSE she hasn't had a ton of invested interaction with them, they still just love the image, not the person.
I think this is a dream life for many people, being so popular with the opposite sex. Some people go their entire lives without so much as a single sexual relationship, and it's pretty common for people to have long dry spells between gf/bfs. She sounds like a female Charlie Harper, she probably loves the excitement of a fresh relationship and she undoubtedly has a lot of fun dating. Sounds like you are jealous, but as to whether this is normal? absolutely not, I think few people are so attractive to the opposite sex to pull a dating life like this off year after year.
I think if she really wanted to settle down she would have by now, but in the end her love life is absolutely none of your business.
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