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Yes, the antidepressants all have some side effects but they pass with time. And you really need to stay on one for at least a month for it to take effect. Do you have any idea of the numbers of people on these meds these days? Tons. Your physician can handle this for you very adequately so please call for an appt. and tell him/her what happened with Lexapro. BTW, insomnia is one symptom of depression.
Some people are more suited to being home and others need people around them. Forget about what others are saying to you. They don't know how bad you are feeling, and some people talk just to hear themselves speak.
THIS! I keep hearing people say "embrace the loneliness". Wtf? I don't even know what that means. We like the company of friends and family and miss social interaction.
Yes, we enjoy reading, writing, playing games, and watching movies. However, we miss our loved ones. Human interaction.
Try to get a referral to a competent therapist. Many are available on-line.
Thank you, that is exactly what I'm doing as well. Gives me comfort to know someone else is going through almost the same exact thing. I try to "compartmentalize" my depression as well, thanks for finding the right way to word it! For me toughest time is the evening hours so I try to keep myself occupied but sometimes nothing helps. I have moments where I'm happy, I get out of bed, I do my work, I run my errands but it's like there's a dark cloud over me while doing these things. I have moments where I'm hopeful, I know things will get better, but then there are moments where the despair takes over and at times it can be unbearable. I don't ever feel like I'm fully present when I'm doing a task or at a friend's house (which hasn't been recently), the only time I felt fully present since April was when I was taking Lexapro. It is my opinion, that those who are anit-AD have never experienced those feelings before (they think they have, but they haven't), it's like being caught in a wave of despair and you feel like you can't breath or catch your breath and you would do anything to get out of it, and that is why depression can cause suicide, you need to escape that overwhelming feeling at any cost. So unless anyone knows what that feels like, I think it's best they refrain from suggesting whether or not someone should go on AD.
I've been where you are.
First, I strongly suggest you get a therapist. Preferably one you can talk to not just get drugs from. That being said I am not against drugs and any therapist you hire should either be able to prescribe or be associated with someone who can.
A therapist will be a touchstone for you.
Personally, I started with Prozac, which flipped me into mania before that was really a well known side effect. Then lithium to control that which caused me to have an underactive thyroid. Finally, a very astute psychiatrist prescribed Wellbutrin, Clonopin(for anxiety) and a touch of thyroid medication to jump start that. That did the trick and then she insisted/convinced me to stay on it for a year after I felt normal to allow whatever switch in my brain went awry to heal.
Anxiety can really exacerbate depression. IMO sometimes controlling the anxiety can go a long way to helping depression.
Aside from that, there are things you can do to help yourself.
I highly recommend the book "Feeling Good" by Dr. David Burns. It is tied to cognitive behavioral therapy and how negative and other sorts of dysfunctional thinking can lead to and prolong depression.
A gratitude journal can be helpful. A simple exercise......just jot down all the things you are grateful for while you have your beverage of choice in the morning. If you are feeling really bad, it may just be I'm grateful for this cup of coffee or that I have a job and a roof over my head, etc. Day by day it will be easier and a longer list and will give you a boost and a positive start to the day.
Put as much structure and ritual in your life as you can. Whether its personal grooming, housecleaning, errands, etc. All of those things can seem almost impossible when you are depressed. Making them a ritual helps.
As others have said, exercise. Doesnt have to be a two mile run you used to do, although if you can push yourself to do that thats great. It can be as simple as walking around the block, getting some sun or turning up the music and dancing around your living room.
Take care of yourself. Order small gifts for yourself. Chat up the delivery person from a distance. Pick up a bunch of flowers at the groc and divide them up into smaller arrangements in the rooms you spend most of your time. Order food treats.
If you have tasks that seem overwhelming, push yourself to just start them and do them for 15 minutes. You will likely be able to go longer and possibly even finish them. It will make you feel better.
Bottom line, one of the ways to get out of depression is to string small hopeful, positive moments together until that is seamlessly what is happening in your life most of the time.
As for your friends, maybe try them again next week after the busy holiday season is over. Talk to them about positive things rather than your depression. As you have said, unless they have been there, they cant relate and they dont know what to say to you or may even be afraid they will say the wrong thing and make it worse. Sometime fake it until you make it is useful. That might give you better interaction with your mom as well.
Finally, I want to gently challenge you to reconsider whether or not your depression truly came out of nowhere. I originally thought that, but in the end it tied back to a traumatic event in my life where stuff I had suppressed got triggered by some really rather benign events that happened 10 years later. This is also where a therapist may be useful.
Take care. I know its hard and I hope things get better for you soon.
There/ are millions of "alone" people, without a virus running amok.
WITH the virus running amok, there's even MORE "alone" people. A lot of them , dying alone. That's truly sad.
Too bad the OP can't visit an ER, today. Right now. Talk about a slap-in-the-face reality check...
(Ummm, yeah, I work at a hospital...)
Agreed, and that is certainly true about the ER.
But somehow, all the worse-off sufferers don't cheer me up any. I just feel worse for them....
I WISH the drugs mentioned would really help. I've tried several and not a one did anything helpful, just detrimental. Some seem to help others though.
I'm a big advocate of mj for uninterrupted sleep, though. That sure helps!
Also, switched from news sites to entertainment sites to get my mind off THAT depressing stuff!
I don't think the point of seeing worse-off sufferers is to "cheer you up." It would be to help you realize that you don't have it so bad after all. A nursing home, where residents haven't been allowed any visitors or to see their loved ones for nine months now, would be an even better example...
Last edited by otterhere; 12-29-2020 at 11:27 AM..
I don't think the point of seeing worse-off sufferers is to "cheer you up." It would be to help you realize that you don't have it so bad after all. A nursing home, where residents haven't been allowed any visitors or to see their loved ones for nine months now, would be an even better example...
While of course suffering alone in a nursing home or ER is awful. That doesn't minimize the pain someone going through depression experiences. I understand the thought of putting something in perspective but unfortunately it doesn't work that way when you're suffering from depression, this is reminiscent of what my friend said when I told her it's been a bad year, and her response was basically what's so terrible? People are dying, you didn't lose anyone.
There will always be someone in a worse off situation than you, but that doesn't and shouldn't minimize what you are going through.
IMO, it's a pretty sanctimonious statement to make.
OP -- I understand. I have been where you are and am feeling myself slipping slowly back into that for numerous reasons (I don't enjoy my job, even though I'm lucky to have it; my father is slipping mentally; and my BFF has stage 4 cancer and suffering a lot, just to name a few recent triggers.)
Plus, the news is basically negative every single day. I mean, who can be cheery when this is life right now?
I do think antidepressants help. I also advice having a good physical workup to make sure everything is hormonally balanced too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by KemBro71
I wouldn't have said this in June, but I think it's high time for some different/new messaging about the mental health impacts of the extended restrictions. "Hang in there, we'll get back to.....soon" and the shaming of certain behaviors is NOT working anymore and may be contributing to the surge.
I am starting to feel the same way. My father is losing cognitive ability and so is my MIL. I truly understand the severity of COVID, but at some point you have to weight the risks that come with social isolation. I read recently that the risk of dying in a car accident was roughly the same as the risk of a person over age 64 dying from COVID. Yet we don't force people to not ride in cars.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182
I was talking to a friend about a month ago and I told her it's been a terrible year, and her response was "how has it been terrible for you, you're still alive and people are dying" I was so taken aback by that and then started questioning myself for saying something like that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NORTY FLATZ
Too bad the OP can't visit an ER, today. Right now. Talk about a slap-in-the-face reality check...
(Ummm, yeah, I work at a hospital...)
I have been berating myself for feeling depressed when as I said my best friend is suffering with cancer and she will always be in treatment the rest of her life. I mean, intellectually I ask myself how can I feel down when I see what she is going through and how her attitude is so positive? But then I remind myself that her suffering and my depression don't have to be equal to both be valid. I just don't talk about my feelings of depression around her because I just feel silly doing so and I want my time with her to feel like a bright spot for her. Even though she would want me to talk about my feelings! She is that good a friend!
That said, I think the "people are dying" comments are misplaced because people are ALWAYS dying. Every single day of my life there have been thousands of people lying in hospital beds dying horrible deaths before they have lived a complete life. My mother suffered from Alzheimer's for almost 2 decades, not knowing who she or anyone was, so there's that too. Yet now that people are dying of COVID, we are to be shamed and guilted for feeling depressed.
I believe OP means that the restrictions, cancellations, and changes to her world that the pandemic and quarantine have wrought are depressing her. MOST of us can relate to this.
Hmmmm...so adaptation to a change is creating this condition.
Not sure 'most' are transition challenged.
I am though understanding that for this poster the challenge is there . The awareness to find solutions is worth seeking.
Hmmmm...so adaptation to a change is creating this condition.
Not sure 'most' are transition challenged.
I am though understanding that for this poster the challenge is there . The awareness to find solutions is worth seeking.
I wouldn't say that's an accurate terminology for what is going on. I adapt fairly easily to a change in surroundings, but for lots of us our worlds have been turned upside down and coping isn't easy especially when you have underlying mental health issues. I would hardly call it "transition challenged" since that implies I have trouble adapting to change, which is not the case.
And I would have to disagree with you in saying this is not affecting "most" people. In my experience it is, since 99% of the people in my life have been strongly affected by this pandemic.
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