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What are the key indicators that someone indeed is just highly insecure versus they are a narcissist. I do know all narcissists are highly insecure, but I know not all highly insecure people are not narcissists.
They use people to soothe their egos or to treat them like victims (depending on the type of narcissist.) But it's always about them. Other people are just a mirror.
They use people to soothe their egos or to treat them like victims (depending on the type of narcissist.) But it's always about them. Other people are just a mirror.
So let's say someone who is very insecure, but never puts down other people or treats them badly, but does need a lot validation is perhaps not a narcissist?
They use people to soothe their egos or to treat them like victims (depending on the type of narcissist.) But it's always about them. Other people are just a mirror.
True! And they also look for opportunities to find negatives in others as a way of not fully addressing their own unresolved shortcomings. They never really have to deal with themselves, as long as everyone else is a substitute.
A narcissist has no empathy. He/she cannot put himself into the place of another and know how that feels. He will fool you, trying to give you true feelings, but it's a lie. The narcissist is extremely good at being fake. They can make up a personality and show it to you, but it's probably not their real self. Avoid them at all costs.
So let's say someone who is very insecure, but never puts down other people or treats them badly, but does need a lot validation is perhaps not a narcissist?
I think that is correct. There are plenty of insecure people who are not narcissistic.
So let's say someone who is very insecure, but never puts down other people or treats them badly, but does need a lot validation is perhaps not a narcissist?
They may be an emotional vampire, sucking the energy out of others.
Emotional vampires exhibit three specific traits simultaneously: an excessive need for validation/attention from others, the belief that little to nothing that occurs is their fault, and the lack of self-awareness to recognize their self-defeating patterns. People who are familiar with Six Pillars of Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden will recognize that these are three of the six pillars—or rather, a lack of three of the pillars.
This is a dangerous combination for two reasons: 1) these three traits reinforce one another and make each other stronger, and 2) they can often suck in and hurt otherwise good people around them.
And don’t be mistaken, emotional vampires are not all pathetic losers. They can be some of the most charming and successful people you meet. Men, women, beautiful, ugly, rich, poor, they come in many shapes and sizes. But they always create toxic relationships, both as romantic partners and as friends.
A narcissist has no empathy. He/she cannot put himself into the place of another and know how that feels. He will fool you, trying to give you true feelings, but it's a lie. The narcissist is extremely good at being fake. They can make up a personality and show it to you, but it's probably not their real self. Avoid them at all costs.
This is so true...in my experience w/ them.
And, I've seen where they'll mimic you...ie: if you're laughing at something, then they'll start laughing.
If, you're crying, they'll start crying.
Hence, the fake personality.
ETA: True Katnan...they are so charming to others. People have a hard time believing you when you try to explain their true behavior.
They are always the victim, and they NEver apologize.
There is also the kind of narcissist who is not grandiose, but rather a "covert" or "vulnerable" narcissist.
You see this a lot in the Struggle Bros who come here to get off on presenting themselves as victims of women or society. They love farming pity from others because of their looks, childhood bullying, social anxiety or whatever, as long as it's not their fault.
Most of us would dread being scorned or pitied. They enjoy it.
You know the kind...all attention is good attention.
Last edited by zentropa; 01-01-2022 at 10:53 AM..
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