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I'm an older Millennial woman (36), and my handsome husband is younger Gen X (43).
The hardest thing for me to understand about the younger generation (Z) is the absolutely meteoric rise of asexuality and virginity, and their complete lack of knowledge/understanding toward people who value looks and attraction.
I was recently on a forum for Animal Crossing video game players (very high percentage of women under 30; according to the largest poll results, about 75-85% of the people there are women under the age of 30), and of over 60 poll participants, I was literally the only one who valued attraction in a mate. The rest of them repeated the stereotype I always heard growing up that drove me nuts: "I don't care about looks, just personality."
Do you have any actual statistics to back up your claim of meteoric rise of asexuality and virginity among the generation Z?
Because when I look at that group. Whether it be facebook posts or other social media or pop culture that those Gen Z people are into. It seems more highly sexualized than ever. And looks are everything.
I'm an older Millennial woman (36), and my handsome husband is younger Gen X (43).
The hardest thing for me to understand about the younger generation (Z) is the absolutely meteoric rise of asexuality and virginity, and their complete lack of knowledge/understanding toward people who value looks and attraction.
I was recently on a forum for Animal Crossing video game players (very high percentage of women under 30; according to the largest poll results, about 75-85% of the people there are women under the age of 30), and of over 60 poll participants, I was literally the only one who valued attraction in a mate. The rest of them repeated the stereotype I always heard growing up that drove me nuts: "I don't care about looks, just personality."
However, instead of trying to fight against this stereotype, as a small percentage of red-blooded women of my generation would have (especially those of us who had to endure the stereotypes in conservative Christian culture that women are asexual by nature) -- they actually whole-heartedly embraced it.
Only one woman there defended me and understood where I was coming from; the rest excluded me and found me foreign or weird in my thinking. They couldn't understand why male attractiveness could be such an important factor to me.
It doesn't surprise me that, with the immense number of these asexual women under 30, there's been a rise in male virginity in the same demographic:
What psychological, biological, sociological etc. factors have led to this massive generational shift?
My own guess is that all of the following have contributed:
1) extreme feminism and extreme conservatism (they seem polar opposites, but both devalue sex and end up promoting virginity as a natural result)
2) rise of obesity (people are less attractive, and there are more of them, so attractiveness becomes less of a thing)
3) use of plastics (much data seems to support plastic overuse greatly affects fertility, sex hormones, etc.)
4) gloom and doom reports (the fears of overpopulation, climate change, End Times prophecies -- people are afraid to be sexual in these times and thus possibly produce children)
5) men are afraid because of MeToo; these women have such powerful political voices now that they overwhelm both the younger men, and the older women like me who actually like/enjoy sex and attraction
Anything else I'm missing?
You are missing the most important thing...internet porn. That's what is destroying the youth. Free and unlimited access to virtually any deviant behavior you can think of. They can view more women (or men) in one sitting that our ancestors would see in their entire life. It's ruining their brain's reward center. Lots and lots of research on this out there.
OP, your first post in this thread is one of the silliest I've seen -- you seriously think that a poll of 60 gamers is representative of an entire generation? ) ... but nonetheless,reneeh63 tried to respond to you ...
Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63
First question - why do you think it's so important to value attraction/attractiveness? I don't even think they are the same thing but I'm not sure if you do so please clarify.
Why does undervaluing attractiveness mean that someone is asexual? You can only be sexual if you think looks are the most important thing?
Why is it such a personal affront that others are looking at personality factors in dating rather than attractiveness?
And you responded with one of the most rude, arrogant responses I've seen on C-D ...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra
You must be a woman.
Men, especially older ones, will understand why attraction and sex are important.
She didn't say attaction and sex are not important. She asked why you think attraction and attractiveness are the same things (a question you ignored). There are certain characteristics that are considered "conventionally attractive," but they vary tremendously by time and place. In addition, individuals are attracted to different things -- as I wrote in another thread long ago, I definitely want to be physically attracted to my partner (as well as attracted to him in terms of personality, sense of humor, kindness, etc.), but that doesn't mean he needs to look a certain way. Do you really not get that different people are attracted to different things?
In addition, you seem to think that anyone who doesn't think about sex/attraction the same way YOU do is "asexual" (you didn't answer that question of renee's, either) -- which tells me you have no idea what that word means. (The fact that you don't know that there's a whole category of asexuals who are romantically attracted to people while not being sexually attracted to them, also tells me you don't know anything about asexuality.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra
It's just that asexuality and lack of attraction are all the more amplified now in the younger generation of women.
It once was rare to find women like me who valued attraction and sex.
Now it's outright impossible.
What ridiculous statements. I am astonished that you think you are so unusual, as if virtually no other women like sex and want to be attracted to their partner.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra
Women like you outnumber me 10000-1.
There are so many women who repeat the stereotype ad nauseam that personality is all that matters, etc. You are the majority, you have the power. You silence and shame women like me who are more like men and get excited by attraction, looks, sex.
Soon we will go from rare to outright extinct.
I read this ^^^ and just shook my head at how amazing and special and unique you think you are. Really? The current generation is asexual and not attracted to anyone? That is an utterly stupid claim. (Just look at research on hookups on college campuses, where almost no one is asexual and almost everyone wants sex with someone who's attractive to them.)
I am just flabbergasted that you seem to think you are so unusual that you started a thread to tell us how special you are and how annoyed you are at other women for "silencing and shaming" you. It's bizarre.
I'm an older Millennial woman (36), and my handsome husband is younger Gen X (43).
The hardest thing for me to understand about the younger generation (Z) is the absolutely meteoric rise of asexuality and virginity, and their complete lack of knowledge/understanding toward people who value looks and attraction.
I was recently on a forum for Animal Crossing video game players (very high percentage of women under 30; according to the largest poll results, about 75-85% of the people there are women under the age of 30), and of over 60 poll participants, I was literally the only one who valued attraction in a mate. The rest of them repeated the stereotype I always heard growing up that drove me nuts: "I don't care about looks, just personality."
However, instead of trying to fight against this stereotype, as a small percentage of red-blooded women of my generation would have (especially those of us who had to endure the stereotypes in conservative Christian culture that women are asexual by nature) -- they actually whole-heartedly embraced it.
Only one woman there defended me and understood where I was coming from; the rest excluded me and found me foreign or weird in my thinking. They couldn't understand why male attractiveness could be such an important factor to me.
It doesn't surprise me that, with the immense number of these asexual women under 30, there's been a rise in male virginity in the same demographic:
What psychological, biological, sociological etc. factors have led to this massive generational shift?
My own guess is that all of the following have contributed:
1) extreme feminism and extreme conservatism (they seem polar opposites, but both devalue sex and end up promoting virginity as a natural result)
2) rise of obesity (people are less attractive, and there are more of them, so attractiveness becomes less of a thing)
3) use of plastics (much data seems to support plastic overuse greatly affects fertility, sex hormones, etc.)
4) gloom and doom reports (the fears of overpopulation, climate change, End Times prophecies -- people are afraid to be sexual in these times and thus possibly produce children)
5) men are afraid because of MeToo; these women have such powerful political voices now that they overwhelm both the younger men, and the older women like me who actually like/enjoy sex and attraction
Anything else I'm missing?
I would say that lessening the importance of physical attributes and putting more value on personality is a positive thing. It's definitely less shallow. I don't know why you think it's a bad thing.
Don't worry. There are plenty of young women who still wear revealing, red carpet dresses to prom and home coming and young men with bulging muscles, shaved heads, and macho appearances.
I don't mean "feminine" and "masculine" - I mean attention seeking and overly sexual, which ever gender they are.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 1 day ago)
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Reputation: 50620
As always, when you look at social statistics, you have to look at the pool of people the findings are based on.
You need a random sample.
I would guess, that the pool of women who participate in an online gaming forum enough where they're answering polls about their sexuality are an unusual group of women, compared to the general population.
If you wanted to get a good random sample of young women, randomly selecting recently graduated high school students who are over 18 would be a good way to get at this statistic.
Gamers have always been a little different from the general population in a number of ways.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 1 day ago)
35,583 posts, read 17,927,273 times
Reputation: 50620
And by the way, if you look on an online medical health forum for info about "DNA - Who's the Dad?" forums, you will find absolutely no shortage of women who are having sex with one guy, and then two days later another guy, and then go back to the first guy the next day and now their due date is ____ who's the father? LOTS and lots of these women. And they can write very clearly, detailed dates and information and correct grammar, and they can't seem to go 3 days in a row without sex.
So the word that sex isn't happening hasn't gotten out to all of them, apparently.
As always, when you look at social statistics, you have to look at the pool of people the findings are based on.
You need a random sample.
I would guess, that the pool of women who participate in an online gaming forum enough where they're answering polls about their sexuality are an unusual group of women, compared to the general population.
If you wanted to get a good random sample of young women, randomly selecting recently graduated high school students who are over 18 would be a good way to get at this statistic.
Gamers have always been a little different from the general population in a number of ways.
It's possible that's the group the OP most identifies with so it's completely representative...of her.
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) ... but nonetheless,reneeh63 tried to respond to you ...
It's bizarre.
