Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 05-05-2021, 01:01 PM
 
Location: SW MO
237 posts, read 123,367 times
Reputation: 336

Advertisements

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...-look-n1259998


I live in MO. I'm in conservative culture. My husband isn't conservative, but the churches I've been to often are.


I'm aware of things like this. That's why I have threads dealing with sexuality, men, women, and the different views people have.


You have to understand, when in this kind of cultural context, how challenging it is to be a visual woman. Pastors think this is only a male thing. And males have authority. So if men are shallow, it doesn't matter, because they have the authority.


What do we do when women are also visual? In this kind of culture, they deny we exist. It's only a male thing.


In another kind of culture, women get assailed for being shallow. We're told we're not special or unique for having physical or visual sexual attraction.


And yet these men in authority teach that women cannot possibly be this way.



When you live in Missouri, and you're in this kind of culture -- this is what we get inundated with.


Do you understand now?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 05-05-2021, 01:18 PM
 
3,287 posts, read 2,006,913 times
Reputation: 9033
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra View Post

Do you understand now?
Not really, but why would I need to?

Don't live there, don't worship with wacked out pastors like this.

Are you asking a Psychology question about this? What i believe about the psychology of how people find each other attractive is not impacted by geography or religiosity.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-05-2021, 01:22 PM
 
Location: South of Heaven
7,720 posts, read 3,337,202 times
Reputation: 11285
According to the article he was put on leave and in to counseling over it so it looks like he didn't have the power he thought he did.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-05-2021, 05:10 PM
 
Location: on the wind
23,042 posts, read 18,416,031 times
Reputation: 74579
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra View Post
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...-look-n1259998


I live in MO. I'm in conservative culture. My husband isn't conservative, but the churches I've been to often are.


I'm aware of things like this. That's why I have threads dealing with sexuality, men, women, and the different views people have.


You have to understand, when in this kind of cultural context, how challenging it is to be a visual woman. Pastors think this is only a male thing. And males have authority. So if men are shallow, it doesn't matter, because they have the authority.


What do we do when women are also visual? In this kind of culture, they deny we exist. It's only a male thing.


In another kind of culture, women get assailed for being shallow. We're told we're not special or unique for having physical or visual sexual attraction.


And yet these men in authority teach that women cannot possibly be this way.



When you live in Missouri, and you're in this kind of culture -- this is what we get inundated with.


Do you understand now?
Not really. I don't equate the warped opinions of a few local cultural "authority" figures to the psychological mental processes of an entire species (Homo sapiens). Talk about broad brush stereotyping!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-05-2021, 05:22 PM
 
24,189 posts, read 10,513,459 times
Reputation: 46187
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra View Post
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...-look-n1259998


I live in MO. I'm in conservative culture. My husband isn't conservative, but the churches I've been to often are.


I'm aware of things like this. That's why I have threads dealing with sexuality, men, women, and the different views people have.


You have to understand, when in this kind of cultural context, how challenging it is to be a visual woman. Pastors think this is only a male thing. And males have authority. So if men are shallow, it doesn't matter, because they have the authority.


What do we do when women are also visual? In this kind of culture, they deny we exist. It's only a male thing.


In another kind of culture, women get assailed for being shallow. We're told we're not special or unique for having physical or visual sexual attraction.


And yet these men in authority teach that women cannot possibly be this way.



When you live in Missouri, and you're in this kind of culture -- this is what we get inundated with.


Do you understand now?

I have no clue what you are talking about.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-06-2021, 07:24 AM
 
13,262 posts, read 7,971,371 times
Reputation: 30753
I live in Missouri, and I've grown up in conservative churches, and have attended conservative churches a good chunk of my life.


I'm sorry, but I can't really relate to anything you posted. I've never felt that my pastor(s) thought I was shallow. And as far as I know, in none of the churches I attended, did I think the pastor was dismissive or patronizing to women.


That said, I attended 2 years of high school at a Christian school, and the director of that school was also a pastor of an independent Baptist church, and HE was a creep. Always staring at the older girls and some other things. But he wasn't my pastor. Thankfully.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-06-2021, 07:34 AM
 
13,262 posts, read 7,971,371 times
Reputation: 30753
Ha! I read the link after my first reply. He's a General Baptist preacher. In my life, I've attended 2 General Baptist churches for years. Probably between the 2, 15 years.


This guy in the link, he's NOT typical of General Baptist pastors, and THIS guy is an embarrassment. What an ass.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-06-2021, 09:51 AM
 
13,395 posts, read 13,448,266 times
Reputation: 35711
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra View Post
When you live in Missouri, and you're in this kind of culture -- this is what we get inundated with.


Do you understand now?
That pastor was saying that a marriage and a husband's commitment to the family, marriage, and life built by the two people are solely based on the wife's weight and appearance. That's sexist, shallow, and overall insulting.

As a spouse (of either side), I would be totally upset that what we built as a couple means nothing to my spouse. They could walk away like it means nothing if I gained 10 pounds?? When faced with that, I would feel like I married the wrong person. I would want to walk away to find someone who can put things into perspective.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-06-2021, 10:10 AM
 
Location: SW MO
237 posts, read 123,367 times
Reputation: 336
Thanks all.

I've had discussions about these topics in a number of communities now to get better perspective, and the consensus is I've allowed myself to get too influenced by some really narrow communities with a major echo chamber problem. In getting more feedback, I can now more easily see that these communities aren't very representative of larger populations' views necessarily.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-06-2021, 10:42 AM
 
13,262 posts, read 7,971,371 times
Reputation: 30753
Quote:
Originally Posted by Khendra View Post
Thanks all.

I've had discussions about these topics in a number of communities now to get better perspective, and the consensus is I've allowed myself to get too influenced by some really narrow communities with a major echo chamber problem. In getting more feedback, I can now more easily see that these communities aren't very representative of larger populations' views necessarily.

Exactly.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Psychology
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top