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It has made me less social. I used to show up at lots and lots of social events. I could be going to at least one thing a week, for months at a time. Now, I feel I've adapted to my situation of working at home and not going out, and while I like the idea of having the OPTION to see my friends again, I feel a desire to protect my personal space. I don't want to be dragged into things or to feel obligated. I also used to eat out a lot more and I don't have a desire to go back to doing so. I'm saving a lot of money, and I want to continue to save my money for more important uses. I also have less patience with anyone who feels like they might be taking advantage of me.
So I feel like I've got this lovely little bubble to exist in, and I'm a little defensive of it. I've come to like having better boundaries, and I feel better about myself for having an enhanced ability to say no to other people, compared to how I was before this all started. Also, I've come out of it more interested and aware of certain things and with some extremely smart people to follow and to feed my brain...not entertainment or news personalities, but like a historian who gives talks, she's a legit professor, with a passion for her field, and I'm catching up on so much given that history seemed boring in high school when taught by teachers who didn't seem all that into it.
To those that experienced loss with less support due to social distancing, my heart goes out to you.
2020 was a tidal wave of changes.
Tenacity and resilient.
The curtain was pulled and I no longer blindly entrust humans will do the right thing.
A sweet, kind coworker died shockingly, my much admired and loved boss died, and then my beloved cat (like my child/best friend/ companion to me) died of cancer. I hung on throughout 2020, but now in 2021, I'm falling apart. The culmination of these losses and prior ones (like my dad) and lack of joy have become way too much; life feels too painful and heartbreaking. I've been drinking a lot of wine and cleaning, hoping I can get to a point where everything is not so raw and sensitive.
Taffee...I am so sorry for your losses. On top of COVID, you've indeed a rough couple of years. And we all drank too much wine. It's difficult to successfully cope with such loss and societal upheaval and it sometimes takes a bit of time to work our way through. Do you go outside much? I find that helps me tremendously, even if I just sit and read....or do a puzzle. Fresh air, sun, trees, bird song. It nourishes me at some deeper level.
All that said, this year I'm just depressed and sick of hearing all the grievances day after day...no one can get along....everyone hates everyone else and I'm a racist because I happened to be born white (like I had a choice). I am currently trying to cobble together a more structured routine (having allowed myself a 'year off') and go to the gym, do some gardening, and am looking into taking a college level class...something that interests me.....
I don't like the fact that my kids play Roblox for hours every day.
It is hard for me to find something better for them to do.
It's the same issue with our grandkids---spending lots of time playing games online. Are your kids back in school yet? Our grandkids started back in school a couple of weeks ago. They are actually glad that they don't have to do online learning anymore.
Watching the rioting on TV all summer long in 2020, the censorship by Big Tech, makes me fear for the future of America and by extension, the world.
This year has started off worse, with random attacks on Asians in big cities on the coasts, and now attacks on Jewish people in those same cities. When we collectively give up and let others run our lives, our lives become worse.
It's the same issue with our grandkids---spending lots of time playing games online. Are your kids back in school yet? Our grandkids started back in school a couple of weeks ago. They are actually glad that they don't have to do online learning anymore.
My kids are still zooming from home. Anyway, this school year is about to end.
It's a different world now. Kids want their own YouTube channels. You have explain to them the potential dangers that poses.
Besides my view on humanity taking a hit, we weathered the situation well. It helps being retired, it helps that our extended family did not take and financial hits due to unemployment.
I'm normally pretty good without a lot of social interaction, but even I miss it now. I was much friendlier than normal at a community get together. Gosh, I hope they don't think I can keep that up.
June starts a bunch of trips with friends and family (still mainly camping and such), and youngest son is intent on visiting from HI which will be fun. May go visit another family member up in WA.
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I was much friendlier than normal at a community get together. Gosh, I hope they don't think I can keep that up. 
