I just spend 2 days hanging out with the celeb that I have loved for 30 years. Why can’t I stop crying? (narcissistic, attractive)

[karen_in_nh_2012]

Originally Posted by Layden85

I don’t think he was just being polite. He seemed to want to talk. Yes I think it’s an ego think. And he loved to talk about himself. About his movies, all the celebs he knows. Who is nice. Who is he can’t stand. No filter. Loved that about him. Just hilarious. Seems to have an alcohol, pot, and serious nicotine habit but so fun.

OP, I guess I don't understand what was appealing about him ... from your description in the post of yours I just quoted, he sounds pretty awful (plus, the dating women 20 years younger thing ). Fun to hang out with for an hour or two, but why on earth would you be sad once it was over?

[reneeh63]

I commend you OP in taking the trip you were so concerned about - and glad it was even better than you likely thought it could be!

I'd encourage you to take advantage of this breakthrough to plan some other trips soon and perhaps to still see a therapist who may have good tips on how to make the most of this as well as "investigate" with you how this anxiety arose in the first place.

[Layden85]

Originally Posted by karen_in_nh_2012

OP, I guess I don't understand what was appealing about him ... from your description in the post of yours I just quoted, he sounds pretty awful (plus, the dating women 20 years younger thing ). Fun to hang out with for an hour or two, but why on earth would you be sad once it was over?

He is just so attractive and even better looking in person.

[ciceropolo]

This reminds me of the movie Nurse Betty.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0171580/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0


OP, if this 'celeb meet incident' effects you that much, you should talk to a therapist.

[Euskalherria]

I pity your husband... pity that he is married to someone who is so screwed up.

You can bet your sweet ass I would be consulting with my attorney for an immediate divorce over this little 'stunt' if I was in his shoes.

[Bungalove]

Originally Posted by Euskalherria

I pity your husband... pity that he is married to someone who is so screwed up.

You can bet your sweet ass I would be consulting with my attorney for an immediate divorce over this little 'stunt' if I was in his shoes.

Good golly, what "stunt"?. She was talking to this celebrity in the presence of two other people at a convention (you know, surrounded by mobs of other people?), not jumping his bones in a no-tell motel.

[Euskalherria]

Originally Posted by Bungalove

Good golly, what "stunt"?. She was talking to this celebrity in the presence of two other people at a convention (you know, surrounded by mobs of other people?), not jumping his bones in a no-tell motel.

Ummm... can we say 'emotional cheating'???

She's blubbering and crying over meeting him. What else is she doing - thinking of *him* while being intimate with her husband? Assuming that they are, of course.

No. Just no. And does her husband even know of any of this?

This whole thing stinks. Reeks of adolescent immaturity and a lack of consideration for her husband and their marriage.

[RamenAddict]

Originally Posted by Euskalherria

Ummm... can we say 'emotional cheating'???

She's blubbering and crying over meeting him. What else is she doing - thinking of *him* while being intimate with her husband? Assuming that they are, of course.

No. Just no. And does her husband even know of any of this?

This whole thing stinks. Reeks of adolescent immaturity and a lack of consideration for her husband and their marriage.

Uh- a lot of celebrities have fans. I have a teacher of a fitness class who is always going on about some celebrity she finds swoonworthy. She is a fortysomething women who is married with 3 kids and and I don’t think any of us are under the impression that she wants to leave her husband for these men. I would go so far as to say it is pretty normal for people to have celebrity crushes, even married people.

[Vector1]

Originally Posted by Layden85

At a convention. He was so normal and funny. Talked to us a lot. Hung out at the bar with us. Just sat at a table and talked to us until he had to leave. So much eye contact. So hot at 48. Said he wanted to keep in touch (it was me and 2 other fans I met online) one gave him gifts and her info and he said he would contact her and for her to contact us because he liked us and we had a good energy. Yeah he was a little drunk by then but he was just so cool. Now I can’t stop tearing up when I think about it. Maybe a mix of happiness that it happened. Sad that is over. And that I’m was just so attracted to him and will never know what it’s like. I’m married but he wouldn’t be into me or the other fans considering he dates women 20 years younger.

First question before interventional therapy.

Lets say he was totally into a woman like you (age, figure, looks, chemistry, etc.), and you had an opportunity to have him as a lover, even just for one night.
[ I know I am playing into a "what if fantasy", but keep in mind the consequences. You lose your current marriage, the respect of your kids/friends/social network, and though he seems hot beyond imagine, the affair is not going to last ]
So that considered, would it really be worth seeing if the grass was greener on the other side?

That question takes on even more reality if you consider said "celeb" was a jerk, cruel, or XYZ that your life long mate was not.
Would it still be worth it?
Keep in mind your current husband might have gotten overweight, snores, has X amount of quirks, etc.
Don't assume just because someone is famous, they are without flaws or even things you might despise.

To give you an example of what I mean, look no further than fan based forums created by, and only frequented by older women who pine after aging R&R groups.
Take an example of older women who love the Eagles (music group from the 70's), yet find one member great, and despising anyone who has even the slightest criticism of them.
If they control the forum, you will be banned and/or have your opinion removed, if you dare say anything negative about their favorite member.
Sure the guy could be a loser in real life, but if they had a personal connection, or God forbid an actual meeting with them, they will defend them, like an only child of theirs.

I digress.

The point being that we are all human beings, and have our +'s & -'s.
Getting wrapped up in lamenting about a fantasy figure is not productive/realistic, nor something that can bring you happiness.

[Euskalherria]

Originally Posted by RamenAddict

Uh- a lot of celebrities have fans. I have a teacher of a fitness class who is always going on about some celebrity she finds swoonworthy. She is a fortysomething women who is married with 3 kids and and I don’t think any of us are under the impression that she wants to leave her husband for these men. I would go so far as to say it is pretty normal for people to have celebrity crushes, even married people.

I don't consider the OP's situation to be 'normal'.

I have a 'celeb crush' too but I don't act the way the OP is carrying on and I certainly would not 'fantasize' about them when making love to my partner - not that I currently have a partner.

The OP needs therapy AND she needs to come clean with her hubby about this mess if she hasn't.