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I agree with otowi. We tend to pathologize some things that are normal because of false expectations. I think it's quite normal for people lacking life experience to think, "Once I do this, and get this and achieve that, my life will be good."
Of course that's a false belief. Subscribe to that and you're bound to get bogged down and disappointed eventually.
Looking at life as a process and not a product is a good solution. Even good relationships hit rough spots, even healthy minds fill with doubt and sadness. Nothing stays the same forever. Ebbs and flows are natural in all living things.
The challenge isn't to question why. That's just a given in life. The challenge is to be open to new improvements when things get out of balance.
Living well is a lifelong task and for me the largest part of it is recognizing that it is my attitude toward it that will make the difference between being content and being unhappy.
I guess that translates to, "Look inward, not outward."
I think young people believe everything should happen immediately--that they don't have to wait for things. And they seem to underestimate the effort and sacrifices needed to attain what they want. Those of us who are older did not buy beautiful brand new homes at the age of 23. Young people want a house right out of the gate. And we had to make severe financial sacrifices for years in order to afford the down payment on our first home. We weren't buying sports and concert tickets and going on vacations and driving luxury cars and buying latest cell phones during that time, we were saving towards the house. I don't see this is the case today. I also think young people are incredibly naiive about work too. They want to make over $100,000 but not have to work 40-50 hours a week or put up with managers and coworkers (I see a lot of threads about them wanting to quit because someone at the job annoyed them). There's a lot of unrealistic expectations out there.
OK Boomer. I'm guessing you're one of the people who thought that free trade and losing manufacturing jobs was going to cause society to collapse and no one to have good paying jobs anymore. Now kids are just going to college and making twice the ****ty trades and manufacturing jobs pay by just sitting at a desk.
OK Boomer. I'm guessing you're one of the people who thought that free trade and losing manufacturing jobs was going to cause society to collapse and no one to have good paying jobs anymore. Now kids are just going to college and making twice the ****ty trades and manufacturing jobs pay by just sitting at a desk.
That's assuming they can find a job and don't have to work at a bar like AOC did with her Boston U. degree. Many think its easy no matter what their degree is in.
But sure, reality is not like TV. Jobs and money are harder to get. And not everyone is sleeping with everyone else.
That's assuming they can find a job and don't have to work at a bar like AOC did with her Boston U. degree. Many think its easy no matter what their degree is in.
But sure, reality is not like TV. Jobs and money are harder to get. And not everyone is sleeping with everyone else.
Hmmmmm, that's an interesting way of looking at things, the bed hopping.....and perhaps I should apply that to my own anguished, undating life. That I am responding to false programming, a sensor ghost.
I recently saw the Mayday type show about the Concorde crash and the end of that industry and been reading the comments of those who can't understand why we don't have another SST. Maybe it is the same line of thinking there, expecting always something newer and better and not understanding of all the factors that go into something, not appreciating the cost......................especially when it isn't their money.
I had that discussion at least once, saying of how their talking, their socializing was wasting the time I was trying to teach them something, was wasting their money and one piped up, "It's not my money!".
Admittedly, when one finds out that it is and what resources you have aren't producing results and perhaps are insufficient, that is an impact that can really hit home.
That's assuming they can find a job and don't have to work at a bar like AOC did with her Boston U. degree. Many think its easy no matter what their degree is in.
But sure, reality is not like TV. Jobs and money are harder to get. And not everyone is sleeping with everyone else.
A lot of people remain in the industry they were working in immediately after college graduation. Less than 10 years after her graduation, she's a U.S. congresswoman making $174,000/yr. When I was just wrapping up my undergrad program, there were quite a few working in their "college job" a few years after they had graduated. I think the more important measure is where are they in 5 years? 10 years?
That's assuming they can find a job and don't have to work at a bar like AOC did with her Boston U. degree. Many think its easy no matter what their degree is in.
But sure, reality is not like TV. Jobs and money are harder to get. And not everyone is sleeping with everyone else.
Almost all find good jobs eventually. Usually after graduation there are some kids that take up to a year or more to find something good due to lack of experience, but every college grad I know is working in a career that requires a degree. Its just the media that exaggerates kids not finding jobs after college.
Well, that's a shame! So what things in your life are you excited about &/or that you look forward to?
I’m excited about and look forward to a lot of things - making money, raising a family, engaging in hobbies, traveling, etc. I consider myself to be a generally positive person.
However, nothing that I felt was worthwhile in life has come without a significant amount of difficulty and struggle. Maybe it’s in my nature to set the bar too high for myself. It was never my experience or expectation that life was supposed to be easy.
In college most students look forward to graduating and starting their adult life. When friends start getting engaged and married it seems so exciting to move forward to that new stage in life. Its so exciting to get your first real job out of college and start your career. But if you fast forward 10 years its all not so glamorous. Marriages end or become stale. Having a career wears on you and isn't so fun and exciting anymore. I'm guess this is the way it is for 90% of people.
One should not expect utopia in either marriage or first job. Take me for example.
My first job in 1983 started t $50 per week, $10,000 when I got my bar admission. It's been mostly better since. Not glamorous but good, two or so jobs later.
Two months after getting that job I met my first serious girlfriend. It lasted two years, almost to the day. It got stale and I discovered some major personality defects. Next serious girlfriend, starting a little more than a year later, same story but last one year, to the day. About two and one half years later I met the woman that was to become my wife. We married in May 1991 and been happily married since.
A false start or two in both endeavors, yes, but not bad for a forty-year span.
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