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I am going to have fun with this one at an AA meeting.
Those familiar with the format know you get to share without interruption so I am going to say how staying sober during the day is easy but at night 9pm till bed its very lonely, thats when the bars tempt me... cause they do its sit home alone playing computer wile watching TV or go to the bar drink maybe find a lady.
With 40 people in the room I will say lonely and finding someone a few times and the odds overwhelmingly predict if I share first several people in the room will be contemplating what they are going to say including "You have to love yourself first".
But before I am done speaking I am going to say how stupid I think the knee jerk reaction generic one size fits all parrot response "you have to love yourself first" is including what I said in first post that the phrase what inventd by the mental health industry to shut down the topic of loneliness !!
Its really accusatory telling me I don't love myself. Bull! I am a cool dude! I like being a cool funny smart dude.
I am going to get a laugh out of the group. I am not unique in hating the 'you have to love yourself first' shut down the discussion of loneliness scam.
This is going to be fun! I love me for being so cool and fun.
That'll show those stuck-up AA members who's the boss of banal sentiments! And I'm sure they will appreciate all the disruptive, chaotic FUN!!! you bring to the occasion. Sounds like your recovery is going perfectly!
Only, I wonder why you have been unable to solve the very common problem of what to do in the evenings.
I am also sober but I use my evening time a little differently than sitting around wishing I could get drunk. Let me know if you need some tips.
Its really accusatory telling me I don't love myself. Bull! I am a cool dude! I like being a cool funny smart dude.
It's not about you. Remember that you are in a church basement with 39 other drunks, not 39 psychiatrists. If you're better than them, then stop going to meetings and come back when you're not.
It's not about you. Remember that you are in a church basement with 39 other drunks, not 39 psychiatrists. If you're better than them, then stop going to meetings and come back when you're not.
Its 2023, AA hasn't been in church basements since the 1970s.
That'll show those stuck-up AA members who's the boss of banal sentiments! And I'm sure they will appreciate all the disruptive, chaotic FUN!!! you bring to the occasion. Sounds like your recovery is going perfectly!
Only, I wonder why you have been unable to solve the very common problem of what to do in the evenings.
I am also sober but I use my evening time a little differently than sitting around wishing I could get drunk. Let me know if you need some tips.
Are you kidding? The whole room sided with me.
Because message boards cannot accurately convey tone, emotion, facial expressions, gestures, body language, eye contact, oral speech, or face-to-face conversation, it is likely messages will be misinterpreted or misunderstood.
I was not there to start an argument.
Anyway I already posted the pushback by prominent psychologists against the toxic myth of so called "codependency" the likely root of the 'love your self first' one size fits all parrot phrase.
I am not going against the grain, I was ahead of the curve. People have dysfunctional relationships but that codependency thing always seemed like a scam to me.
In the 70s-80s it was "tough love" and "scared straight" failed model of addiction treatment.
Then the 90s-2010s put everyone on psych meds turn them into zombies failed model of addiction treatment.
Now MAYBE they are getting it. Maybe.
Here is the video that inspired me to post this thread.
Because message boards cannot accurately convey tone, emotion, facial expressions, gestures, body language, eye contact, oral speech, or face-to-face conversation, it is likely messages will be misinterpreted or misunderstood.
I was not there to start an argument.
Anyway I already posted the pushback by prominent psychologists against the toxic myth of so called "codependency" the likely root of the 'love your self first' one size fits all parrot phrase.
I am not going against the grain, I was ahead of the curve. People have dysfunctional relationships but that codependency thing always seemed like a scam to me.
In the 70s-80s it was "tough love" and "scared straight" failed model of addiction treatment.
Then the 90s-2010s put everyone on psych meds turn them into zombies failed model of addiction treatment.
Now MAYBE they are getting it. Maybe.
Here is the video that inspired me to post this thread.
Codependency is when you try and save other people instead of yourself. We have zero self-care. It's an adaptation from dysfunction, in my case narcissistic abuse.
A former work colleague of mine volunteered counseling services with a local AA group. Guess where the group was meeting as recently as 2020?
Wait for it...
The local Methodist church's basement!
Yeah; I see the electronic marque outside my town's biggest (mega)church advertising recovery support groups complete with free dinner. Someone I wish I had an addiction other than junk food and trash TV, because I could really use a support group, not to mention a free dinner!
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A former work colleague of mine volunteered counseling services with a local AA group. Guess where the group was meeting as recently as 2020? 
