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Old 07-16-2010, 07:39 AM
 
Location: Kenmore, WA
7,510 posts, read 6,872,002 times
Reputation: 11000

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My sympathies to you for this present, terrible grief. I think I can safely say that all pet owners have experienced what you describe, not just those that have chosen to euthanize, but all. Our companion animals are completely dependent upon us, and even the best of us feel we've failed when they pass on. It is hard to recall that death is the end of every story.

Your grief will last for what seems like forever. Gradually, you will feel better, and then you will have some bad days, then just bad times. Eventually, you forget these bad times, and just remember the good ones. It's a process that is different for every one, and yet the same. Everybody hurts sometime.

Reaching out to others is a good start. So is focusing on the good times, and being grateful. Your time together is never long enough, but the good memories will last for all your days.

Be well.
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Old 07-16-2010, 07:45 AM
 
512 posts, read 1,298,338 times
Reputation: 275
Quote:
Originally Posted by gritsforever View Post
TO SHARPIE: People, humans, with a heart and huge compassion for others when they know they are hurting, there is nothing wrong with that! Obviously, you have never lost a valued friend yet, because you wrote "I know you are sad," "I would be too", so, how do you even know what this is like? or are you just going off your sharp expertise about life and logic? This is so unreal that a person would even write about feeling no pain, move on, and more or less get over your pet that meant so much, they are DEAD! Just get a picture and deal, Man, thats sad that you feel like that! I am glad I am not your pet!! In reality What would I mean to you? Easily discarded!! is what it looks like! Never to be thought of again.. MOVE ON!! Is the way you deal, others deal differently.
well, of course, you are correct!
the 'right' thing to do, would instead be to make up silly wishy-washy fairy tales and lies to tell yourself and make yourself feel good!?

i'm a realist! death is a part of life. dealing with it logically doesn't take away from the love you feel for your pet. it really doesn't.

Last edited by sharpie1234; 07-16-2010 at 08:09 AM..
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Old 07-16-2010, 08:43 AM
 
501 posts, read 1,189,564 times
Reputation: 890
For the sake of argument (and actual logic and realism):

Where does it say in the poem that death is not a part of life?

What is the scientific theory that refutes with proof the events described in the poem?

Is there a scientific theory that would allow for the possibility of the events described in the poem?
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Old 07-16-2010, 08:53 AM
 
Location: East Windsor, NJ
417 posts, read 988,170 times
Reputation: 378
Quote:
Originally Posted by sharpie1234 View Post
obviously there's no point in arguing with a bunch of people who would/could believe anything and everything. (like jordan and vacat)

for the rest of you, if you're depressed about the death of your pet, instead of listening to wishy washy fairy tales, keep their pictures close by, look at them often, adopt another pet sooner rather than later, and give them the love that you used to give to your late pet. in reality, that's all you can do.

Cheers
If you had actually read my post, I had said "although this is not the way I cope with grief." I am more of a realist myself but I had said that I don't think its right to look down upon the way someone else grieves. If it helps someone cope, who are you to judge? This thread is meant to be for support for those who are going through a tough time.

To Aimee and all of the others who have recently lost a pet, know that you are doing what is best for your furry friend and they love you for that. I have learned quite quickly that there is a lot to learn and a lot of people willing to offer their support on this forum, so I wish you the best and that you reflect on the good times with your friend.
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Old 07-16-2010, 09:41 AM
 
11 posts, read 14,219 times
Reputation: 19
Hey Sharpie, I understand what your saying, its o.k. to be a realistic person, It takes all kinds to make the world go round, but, I was glad to read that you said it doesn't take away from the love of your pet to be realistic about their death. That was good to read, and other people are glad that this thread is here to help them thru a rough time, of their loss, even if we all are different or not. I just wanted you to know I was a little upset at first about what you said about the poems and all, but, this thread has really helped me cope alot better thru the recent death of my pet, and I wish you the best in life always. I was thinking that being a realist meant, you had no feelings for anything because all of us so far on here, have been so hurt over their loss, and to me, that just felt so cold to read what you wrote, while others are grieving so badly. Take care
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Old 07-16-2010, 09:53 AM
 
512 posts, read 1,298,338 times
Reputation: 275
Quote:
Originally Posted by gritsforever View Post
Hey Sharpie, I understand what your saying, its o.k. to be a realistic person, It takes all kinds to make the world go round, but, I was glad to read that you said it doesn't take away from the love of your pet to be realistic about their death. That was good to read, and other people are glad that this thread is here to help them thru a rough time, of their loss, even if we all are different or not. I just wanted you to know I was a little upset at first about what you said about the poems and all, but, this thread has really helped me cope alot better thru the recent death of my pet, and I wish you the best in life always. I was thinking that being a realist meant, you had no feelings for anything because all of us so far on here, have been so hurt over their loss, and to me, that just felt so cold to read what you wrote, while others are grieving so badly. Take care
i'm sorry if i gave the impression that i underestimate the hurt caused by the death of a pet. that's not the case at all. my two cats are 10 and 11 and it's only a matter of time before....
i think about that often and it pains me to even think about it and consider it, because i do love them and they are like my kids, always there, always eager to cuddle with me, greet me at the door, see me to the door as i'm leaving every single day, and many many other things that they do to make me love them so much.
being a realist does not make you heartless, it does not make you care any less about people or pets, concerning their death. it just is a different, more true way of thinking and dealing with the death.
I think it is worth more to be hurt and consider that a natural part of life, and what makes it special, than it is to fool yourself in to believing in doggy heavens, unlimited pork chops, and rainbow bridges.

again, i'm sorry for your loss and i hope you can someday fill the void in your heart. i really do.

Cheers
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Old 07-16-2010, 10:28 AM
 
11 posts, read 14,219 times
Reputation: 19
something I wrote, that may help someone else:The day had came, when it was time to say goodbye, to a dear and loyal friend, tears filled my eyes. As we both spent time together in that vets office room, Thoughts filled my mind, of days gone by...too soon. I watched you in amazement about how brave you must be, you did not know what awaits you, your life, no more will be. It breaks my heart to realize, that this time had come so fast, and here we are together, knowing this will be my last...kiss on your face, rubbing soft velvet ears,smelling your scent of doggy fur, seeing you year, after year, seeing you in the mornings and all the day thru, will no longer be, but seeing you in my dreams at night..comfort it will be. As I saw you drift off to sleep, you in my arms a treasure to keep, I was right by your side, the day we had to say goodbye, and now I carry on without you, but, I still feel you near, for a love as great as "OUR LOVE" will never disappear, this one more thing I have to say, I'd do it all over again, In a heartbeat if I could, I'd have you "back home" again. to my faithful friend ZORRO, forever loved!
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Old 07-16-2010, 10:39 AM
 
501 posts, read 1,189,564 times
Reputation: 890
Quote:
Originally Posted by sugarsugar View Post
For the sake of argument (and actual logic and realism):

Where does it say in the poem that death is not a part of life?

What is the scientific theory that refutes with proof the events described in the poem?

Is there a scientific theory that would allow for the possibility of the events described in the poem?
Since these questions went unanswered, I'll provide the answers.

The poem focuses on the time frame after a physical death has occurred, as opposed to only the physical act of death. There currently is not scientific theory that provides an absolute refutation. And there is a current theory that would allow for the possibility.

So what does that tell us? That until humanity has the answer for certain, everything is still on the table, and "possible". I have my beliefs about such things, the realist has his beliefs about such things, the religious minded person has a belief about heaven, and the after life rainbow person has their belief, plus as many combinations of the above as imaginable - and none have been definitively established as impossible. In light of that, it would be reasonable to be kind to others with regard to what they believe is possible.

The advance of scientific discovery, if nothing else, shows the reality of "possibility" - not all that long ago, things we take for granted today would have had one burned at the stake for merely claiming such things to be possible.

I have my own beliefs about such things, but until we all have the proof in hand, other possibilities can and do exist. I'm not thinking pork chops are too likely, but you know, I can't rule them out yet.

Last edited by sugarsugar; 07-16-2010 at 10:58 AM..
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Old 07-16-2010, 10:44 AM
 
501 posts, read 1,189,564 times
Reputation: 890
I also want to say that this thread took me days to finish, because I've been through it many times, and it was very painful to read, and yet that is not nearly as painful as going through it is. I have an older dog whose time is coming, and I almost can't think about it.

So I wanted to add a thank you to people for sharing, and my sincere condolences. It might have made me cry to read some posts, but in a way, it is making me reflect and preparing me for yet another passing.
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:00 AM
 
11 posts, read 14,219 times
Reputation: 19
SHARPIE: I knew there was a reason you were on a thread about depression after euthanizing a pet, I told myself this person has not gone thru this yet, but, is reading everyone elses stories to see how they deal, I feel for you about your furry friends there, they are very special to us, the way they fill up our days and life, and it is very painful to even think about the day they will have to leave us, its a subject we wish we never had to bring up, but, I was like you when my dog was still with me, just thinking about it made me sick, knowing the time was soon that I would have to put him down. I put it off for months thinking I'll never have to do this!!! I can never do this, but somehow, we make it thru, and its "them" that gets us through it! see ya sharpie, best wishes to you always
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