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Having lived in upstate NY and here in NC a few times now I can render my opinion in the for what its worth department.
Assumptions used and in some cases verified:
1. No place is perfect. We live in a imperfect world.
2. The older the child in their primary school years the harder to transplant.
3. If you come from a small town and are in your late 30's to late 40's moving here with older kids will not be a picnic. It will tough more than it will be easy.
4. If you are from a large town like say NYC this place will seem more like Mayberry NC complete with a "few" Barney's.
5. If you enjoy change and learning new things than moving here will be easier for you.
6. If you don't like change and have a close circle of friends (who won't be moving with you) you will hate it here. It can take from a year to never to really call this place home.
7. Home is just a house until you feel friendship, community, and personal peace within it.
8. Jobs are everywhere if you look hard enough and are qualified to apply for them. Being you say your a Police Officer in NYC with I will assume some seniority you would make less here than there.
You are smart by asking first and leaping second or maybe forth. Knowledge of the area, its people and customs can only help in deciding to make the move or not. Best of luck to you and your family.
P.S. I almost forgot about the schools, the schools! See the WCPSS website and read the New & Observer online newspaper and/or the WRAL website for the most up to date info on the proposed changes to the public school system here and you can decide if that is what you want to expose yourself and your children to or not. Private schools are always an option but on average are more expensive here than the Northeast private schools.
As I said I lived both places a few times with my job and each has its pluses and minuses, for me and my family the pluses have passed the minuses a few years after we got here. But there will always be minuses no matter how positive things sound!
I've been contemplating moving my family again, from Birmingham, AL out to some western city in Arizona, California, or Colorado. Open to new ideas and new opportunities.
I was interested in this thread because I used to live in Charlotte, NC and made several trips to the RL/DU/CH area, or the Triangle as it's known. It's a busy place, to be sure. And it's been 7-8 years since I was last there. I have to think that a lot of the immigration from the North and from the South (of the border), has contributed to the melting down of that pot. High home prices, high medical costs, etc..are all caused by too much demand. But to those who mentioned the heat and humidity....well, I'm in Birmingham right now. That's all I'll say about that .
Having moved a couple times in the last 10 years, I just keep thinking, "is the grass really any greener?" I didn't notice a big difference in way of life from Charlotte to Birmingham and vice versa. The cities are similar in size, but this economic downturn has changed a lot of places for the worse. I thought higher unemployment would help the traffic situation some...Ha! If anything there is MORE cars on the road now. I'm sure the same is true in North Carolina big cities. Heck, even Atlanta, traffic-hell, still has the worst gridlock of any place I've been to.
So, thinking about making a move, but just reluctant to do anything at all right now. Not even interested in refi-ing my house, because I just don't want to make any decisions at all.
We moved down to Cary, from NY, have been here since December. Hubby's also retired but jobs don't come easy down here. Schools are best in Wake County but also in Chapel hill. Search newsweekstophighschools.com for a better view of best schools. I recomend Green Hope High School. Colleges/Universities top notch. It is safe, affordable, the people are nice, lots of New Yorkers, it is easy for kids because there is a lot of movement in the schools. they won't have a problem making friends. Lots of outdoor activities, great parks, trails (nature) Restaurants nothing like NY. Food isn't that great. Service is SLOW. Car insurance real low, weather is perfect. Not too hot not too cold. insects yes. snakes, I've seen 1 (copperhead) in the park. Traffic is nothing like NY. Cary is considered crowded because surrounding areas are ghost towns lol! Cary and Apex are similar so is Morrisville. shopping, restaurants etc. Never been to chapel hill but I heard good things depending on the area.
This area is not what lots of people expect; i.e., a slower life; calmness; slow-moving people; calm drivers on uncrowded highways; friendliness in every direction you turn whether calling a local business by phone or dealing with a store clerk; people who greet you with smiling faces in public places, on and on.
Nope. It's not like that any longer. Don't know if it ever was. The Triangle area has gotten to be similar to other cities and in some ways is less pleasant than lots of towns in the Northeast. Have you seen the info about gangs in this area?
Great job at scaring them off Toodie, I'll slip you a dollar later
Seriously, yes, it was once like that. I moved here in the '70's, it was awesome! I was floored at how polite and helpful people were. Customer service was top knotch - better than Harrod's in LondonObviously it was all due to less population, it was mostly local folks, it was as you described in your first paragraph. It was like that thru the mid '80's but slowly it has changed with the influx of people from all over, apparently, many from the NE.
What we have now is a function of the increased population such as different driving styles - mostly horrible and aggressive! Different expectations. Many posts in this thread give great advice. It's not for everyone to live here, come check it it first. Oh, and Gangs, puleez! They are gang wannabee's.
Great photos NRG! Reminds me of English and Spanish beaches, shudder!
Thanks Raleigh Lass, but I'm not looking for an extra dollar. I'm just saying what I wish would be told to me if I were considering moving here. And as far as gangs, I'm afraid they're not just wannabe gang members in our schools.
"We know that gang presence in schools has increased," said William Lassiter with the North Carolina Department of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Programs.
Lassiter has also written a book about school violence.
"A lot of these kids are already involved in violent behavior," he explained.
There's plenty of statistical data to back up Lassiter. ABC11 looked at a recent Raleigh Police Department report that shows police responded to 283 gang related incidents in Wake County high schools in the last year.
And then there's this: NC Wanted investigates gang violence in the Triangle :: WRAL.com
A recent survey estimated there are 14,500 gang members in North Carolina, and projections put numbers at 29,000 to 41,000 within five years. As to whether the tide can be stemmed in the next five years, the gang members we talked to are doubtful.
"I don't think it's solvable. Cause it's been that way too long. People are used to it. People are not going to start banging because people in power tell them to stop banging," gang member Nicole said.
"I would say a percentage of people that's in gangs would be about 75 to 80 percent. Two people out of every 10 dudes, not even that much, would stand up and say 'I ain't in no gang,'" Mario said.
* * * * *
Yes, there is the potential for a more perfect place to be found here in Raleigh for many people compared to where they're living. And there is an "almost perfect" place for many. Maybe this is it for you, and many others. Maybe it's not for lots of people.
I'm sure most reading here and trying to make a major life decision appreciate every bit of information available when exploring new geographical locations. This place is so not "It" for many folks. It's okay here. There are lots of better places and lots of worse places.
This board needs some opinions with gumption! Even though most here are "go Raleigh" fans, and "No place better" fans, an element of sincere reality is what I convey, strictly from my own experiences having lived in many parts of this country.
Toodie...I'm not trying to get this thread off track nor argue your points but if you read the first link you included in your post, the offenses are pretty mild, the kind of stuff kids have been doing for years. I just don't associate the gangs we have here with the kind you think of as depicted in movies or from East Central LA or wherever. I just don't want people to think we have that kind of environment in our schools, because we don't. If we did, I'd certainly speak up. Overall, from what I'm seeing and hearing, the true gang behavior here is rare or less serious. What does impress me about our area is that law enforcement and social service agencies work together to combat it in an effort to stop the spread.
And the single most important thing a parent can do is communicate with their child, know who their friends are, where they are all times. Be there for them. the kids most at risk are the ones without a strong support system, a nurturing home environment. These are the same rules for keeping kids away from drugs. I had a family member who was in law enforcement and for a time worked with juvenile delinquents. it was heartbreaking to hear that many of these kids were alone, they were almost feral. Nobody asked when they'd be home, how they were...nobody seemed to care.
Again, for folks considering moving here - if you live in a good neighborhood, send your child to a good school, I don't believe you'll have an issue.
City Data does have posts with varying opinions about this area, a search will yield lots of info. But Toodie, if from your experience, you feel this isn't a good place, then it would help others, especially the OP if you were to list the reasons, as your post focused just on gangs. I agree with you that it's important to be honest and share your experience here.
One thing to think about is if your son is deeply entrenched with his friends. I come from a military family and had a hard time moving all the time. So much that when my dad was relocated while I was in the 10th grade I stayed where I was at and payed my own rent b/c I didn't want to leave my friends, job, and car and have to start all over again.
Have you asked your son? He might welcome the change. But all in all, you have to what is good for the family.
From everything I hear, our state schools (colleges and university) are some of the best and cheapest. I actually know a few families that moved here when their kids finished HS while their kids attended college here.
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This is fascinating.
Obviously it was all due to less population, it was mostly local folks, it was as you described in your first paragraph. It was like that thru the mid '80's but slowly it has changed with the influx of people from all over, apparently, many from the NE. 
