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Old 09-26-2007, 08:36 PM
 
54 posts, read 207,571 times
Reputation: 30

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I live in a quiet, fairly affluent and small community just outside of Fairfield County in CT. Although it is very safe and the schools are great, I feel the guardedness, rigidity and sense of entitlement from the high achieving, wealthy, BMW driving CFO's that seem to blanket this region of the country. People that will cordially nod their heads at you with little or no concern for daily kindness. It's really a shame that an area filled with high IQ's, have really low EQ's (Emotional Quotient). I can't believe how difficult it is for people to be pleasant up here. Please tell me it is more relaxed down there, because despite my willingness to take a significant pay cut, I would gladly do it to be free from the cerebral, status-oriented, did-you-recycle-your-cardboard too communities that are filled with high achieving but very lonely and anxiety-filled people that believe their families and issues are at the center of the universe.
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Old 09-26-2007, 08:42 PM
 
460 posts, read 1,770,764 times
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I've never lived in CT, but having come from a DC environment very close to what you describe, I can say with certainty: The people are MUCH nicer here. So much so, that it's kind of weird, at first. Strangers wave at you when you drive down the street.

When my neighbor came over to introduce herself the day I moved in, it struck me as so odd, I almost couldn't speak back to her...

You may be taking a pay cut, but your money will go MUCH further here. Have you checked into the housing market here? you get a bunch for your money.

Based on your description of what you're tired of, I think you'll like it here.

My friends thought I was crazy when I 'got tired of the things you're tired of', and decided to move to Carolina.

I have to admit, I'm a bit 'bored' from time to time, and I miss some of my friends, but all in all, it's one of the best decisions I've ever made. I'm so relaxed here, that it's taken several years off of my appearance. Just the other day, I was mistaken for being in college (I'm nearly 40).

In my 'old life', I had to work HARD (botox, creams, tons of make up) to barely look my age - if not older.
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Old 09-26-2007, 08:45 PM
 
86 posts, read 141,907 times
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Default everyone is different, no matter where you live...

Whether it be in your state or in NC. We have plenty of butt holes here. I run into them every day driving to work.

Remember one thing, "usually" upscale homes translate into home owners that have good interpersonal skills. They are more likely to be personable with others.

You can't make $100K a year "usually" and not be friendly with others.
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Old 09-26-2007, 08:51 PM
 
460 posts, read 1,770,764 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by workerbeeishere View Post
Remember one thing, "usually" upscale homes translate into home owners that have good interpersonal skills. They are more likely to be personable with others.
I don't mean to be rude, but that simply isn't true. Even worse, your response is probably demonstrative of the attitude the OP is looking to get away from.

Quote:
Originally Posted by workerbeeishere View Post
You can't make $100K a year "usually" and not be friendly with others.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Gurl View Post
I've never lived in CT, but having come from a DC environment very close to what you describe, I can say with certainty: The people are MUCH nicer here.
Nice, but maybe a bit delusional...
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:03 PM
 
3,021 posts, read 11,060,843 times
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Bryon, it can vary.

I know some people who were welcomed to their neighborhoods with open arms and plates of cookies. On the other hand, I know people who only met their neighbors when they went to their first HOA meeting. Waving is pretty common in most neighborhoods, though.

When you go to the store, you will occasionally meet clerks who will chat away with you about any ol' thing, but you will also encounter some who barely say more than "hello" to you. People's opinions on this vary. I have no problem whatsoever with chatting with perfect strangers at the store, whether clerks or customers.

As for the money- & status-obsessed people, you can find those here, too. Stereotypically, those individuals live in Cary, North Raleigh, and Chapel Hill. BUT, as I say, those are just stereotypes. You'll find genuinely pleasant people in every town and you'll find genuinely unpleasant people in every town.

Overall, people tend to think of the area as being more laid-back and friendly. Just don't expect a perfect little utopia.
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:14 PM
 
54 posts, read 207,571 times
Reputation: 30
Default Thanks re: NC kindness

It's not as if I'm looking for utopia and open-arms as much as pleasantness. It's amazing how many people seem like they have no clue on how to be present. They're always thinking....always wondering what to buy, what deal to make, how to avoid getting screwed over, how to ensure having 6 figures aside for their children's college fund. And not that any of those concern are unjustified, it's just amazing how people (as a whole) never appear content or peaceable. You sound more relaxed and watch the botox. Your beauty resonates in so many other ways!

quote=Gurl;1589909]I've never lived in CT, but having come from a DC environment very close to what you describe, I can say with certainty: The people are MUCH nicer here. So much so, that it's kind of weird, at first. Strangers wave at you when you drive down the street.

When my neighbor came over to introduce herself the day I moved in, it struck me as so odd, I almost couldn't speak back to her...

You may be taking a pay cut, but your money will go MUCH further here. Have you checked into the housing market here? you get a bunch for your money.

Based on your description of what you're tired of, I think you'll like it here.

My friends thought I was crazy when I 'got tired of the things you're tired of', and decided to move to Carolina.

I have to admit, I'm a bit 'bored' from time to time, and I miss some of my friends, but all in all, it's one of the best decisions I've ever made. I'm so relaxed here, that it's taken several years off of my appearance. Just the other day, I was mistaken for being in college (I'm nearly 40).

In my 'old life', I had to work HARD (botox, creams, tons of make up) to barely look my age - if not older.[/quote]
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:26 PM
 
166 posts, read 664,296 times
Reputation: 59
Growing up in the south I have come to believe that Southern women are all smiles and nicey nice when they first meet you, or are welcoming a newcomer/customer/etc. But they will turn around and stab you gleefully in the back in the next breath. Wicked.
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:33 PM
 
Location: Austin TX
959 posts, read 4,494,091 times
Reputation: 467
It's become the norm for me now but I definitely noticed in my first weeks here in Durham that people are on average FAR more relaxed, genuine, open, and friendly than they were in Northern Virginia. It is a dramatic difference. As for my neighbors, they've been a mix of coming to introduce themselves and not. They've all been very sweet and welcoming when I've talked to them though. And I'm slowly working on instituting waving in my small neighborhood
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:34 PM
 
54 posts, read 207,571 times
Reputation: 30
That sounded like a really ignorant response. Your suggesting that wealthy people are more personable. Where are your statistics for that one?
Quote:
Originally Posted by workerbeeishere View Post
Whether it be in your state or in NC. We have plenty of butt holes here. I run into them every day driving to work.

Remember one thing, "usually" upscale homes translate into home owners that have good interpersonal skills. They are more likely to be personable with others.

You can't make $100K a year "usually" and not be friendly with others.
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:34 PM
 
Location: Austin TX
959 posts, read 4,494,091 times
Reputation: 467
I've definitely sensed some of that, but there are a lot of genuinely nice people. And even the fake smiley people appear relaxed and happy, and that is just such a pleasure to be around. There is just no escaping the fact that there will always be people whose personality you don't mesh well with. And that includes the kindest, sweetest people in the world

Quote:
Originally Posted by momof3grls View Post
Growing up in the south I have come to believe that Southern women are all smiles and nicey nice when they first meet you, or are welcoming a newcomer/customer/etc. But they will turn around and stab you gleefully in the back in the next breath. Wicked.
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