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There is much discussion about the value of many things in the Triangle. I have contributed many a link. But this one scares me and hopefull scares most who live here. I know houses have become a commodity to be valued for profit and loss but now our children? I searched what was the best thread but I think this may be reason for us all to step back and do a check on our thinking.
...this one scares me and hopefull scares most who live here. I know houses have become a commodity to be valued for profit and loss but now our children?
I guess I don't understand what's scary about the article (in terms of values.)
For people who don't have children, I think it's an interesting eye opener regarding the cost of raising a child.
It's funny. For as much as our media likes to talk about "family values", we don't actually do that much to support families. The US isn't that friendly towards families. Our family leave acts are paltry and I think families get judged more than they get helped.
I read the article and still not clear what is so frightening about it. Would somebody mind dumbing it down for me?
First, a women about to deliver can find what ever she wants scary.
Second, new parents are often overwhelmed by, and scared, of what they are undertaking. It's a huge responsibility and challenge if done right.
If a new parent doesn't break out in a cold sweat at the thought at least once, they aren't taking it seriously enough.
The rest of the 'not doing enough for families bit...I will remain pretty silent on. I tend to be of the camp that thinks folks should take responsibility for themselves when ever possible...and that comes to families as well.
I read the article and still not clear what is so frightening about it. Would somebody mind dumbing it down for me?
Maybe it is generational but that last paragraph bothers me. Both of my children were planned and we wanted to make sure we were able to provide a secure childhood and transition into adulthood. We never looked at them in terms of their financial return nor do I value them today based on economics. We are very proud of their accomplishments and hope that they will value their children for their intrinsic worth and not extrinsic dollar cost. Maybe it is me seeing the words childrearing is a suckers game that scares me about our future. Maybe I have participated in to many real estate discussions about a house vs a home etc. But if I ever valued my sons based on their financial cost vs future value they not only would be devastated but probably wouldn't believe me. Then again maybe I am just old.
I read the article and still not clear what is so frightening about it. Would somebody mind dumbing it down for me?
I could be wrong, but I think what the original poster found scary in a values sense is the whole idea of evaluating children in terms of how much money they cost and "are they worth it?" It is one thing to have an article saying "children cost money, so be financially prepared" and another to have "children cost money, are they worth the investment" (with the implication that you are making a trade-off with other "investments" like a second home or that yacht you've been wanting).
I'm guessing the second poster was more scared in terms of "where will I come up with that much money"?
I don't personally read articles like this, because I think they border on useless in a number of ways. I don't think people make decisions to have children based on the costs. I don't think national averages have any meaning whatsoever in terms of your personal budget. We all live in NC, where state university is, in a relative sense, very cheap. My preschool is not $375 a month like the person in the article; it is $150. That's a personal decision, as there are places around here that are $500. There are a wide range of costs, and everyone makes trade-offs throughout life, as you do with everything.
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Perspective not dumbing down
