Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I've been visiting these forums for many years but have never posted this is my first one and I am looking for genuine advice, Here goes ..
I'll try to keep this short.
I've lived in many different cities but I currently reside in Virginia Beach Va for two years..I like it here.. Bought a house last year that I am content with. I work for the government (veterans affairs) GS-05 pay. The Problem is I am depressed about a 4 year relationship that ended over a year ago (I know) I'm still in extreme pain, this guy moved here with me from DC he decided to stay here also and I see him from time to time with the woman he left me for and it crushes my soul...I've met a few guys but they've all been complete Douche Bag users!
Lately I've been feeling like I need to get away/start over, I have an upcoming interview at the Durham VA hospital GS-7 / 11 pay which will be a HUGE career promotion for me. I just don't know what to do if I was offered the position, I would have to sell/rent my home ..I actually do like where I am. I've applied for positions in this area but had zero luck.
The good thing is my sons dad lives in Mebane so visits will be much more frequent.
You seem to be asking us if a career promotion that pays better but forces you to move from a place you like will mend a broken heart or cure depression?
The only thing I can tell you is you do NOT want the folks of this forum to do Dr. Phil surgery on you. See a real therapist about your depression problem, a real estate agent if you want to sell your home, and talk to people who know you well about relationship woes.
Moving to Raleigh or anywhere else is not an insta-cure for a relationship problem.
I feel for you...you sound so unhappy.
However, beware of geographic solutions; not always a good idea.
You say you really like where you live. is it because being there still makes you feel "close" to your ex?
Only you can answer that question honestly. if it were me, I would hate running into him.
Most ppl who write on this forum are advised to seek employed before they come.
You not only have that covered but you would be making more money.
Second positive is that your child's father is here. Another pro I assume.
Whether you are here or there, it sounds as if you will remain broken-hearted for awhile.
A change in routine and scenery might be good. However, it does leave you open to being critical of this area if you don't love it right away or don't feel better as soon as you get here. One of the most important things I have learned in this life is "wherever you go, there you are".
. The only thing i can tell you is you do not want the folks of this forum to do dr. Phil surgery on you. See a real therapist about your depression problem, a real estate agent if you want to sell your home, and talk to people who know you well about relationship woes.
Moving to raleigh or anywhere else is not an insta-cure for a relationship problem.
I've been visiting these forums for many years but have never posted this is my first one and I am looking for genuine advice, Here goes ..
I'll try to keep this short.
I've lived in many different cities but I currently reside in Virginia Beach Va for two years..I like it here.. Bought a house last year that I am content with. I work for the government (veterans affairs) GS-05 pay. The Problem is I am depressed about a 4 year relationship that ended over a year ago (I know) I'm still in extreme pain, this guy moved here with me from DC he decided to stay here also and I see him from time to time with the woman he left me for and it crushes my soul...I've met a few guys but they've all been complete Douche Bag users!
Lately I've been feeling like I need to get away/start over, I have an upcoming interview at the Durham VA hospital GS-7 / 11 pay which will be a HUGE career promotion for me. I just don't know what to do if I was offered the position, I would have to sell/rent my home ..I actually do like where I am. I've applied for positions in this area but had zero luck.
The good thing is my sons dad lives in Mebane so visits will be much more frequent.
Your thoughts...
Changing scenery changes nothing. The pay and promotion may help.
I didn't see your son's age but if his dad is a good influence & wants to be involved then moving near him is a huge plus for you & your son...
The job would be a step up ...huge plus..
Change of scenery & new start can be a good thing...another plus..
What would be the downside to the move...
ps...I would change your username and start convincing yourself that this is
a new start...
Changing scenery changes nothing. The pay and promotion may help.
The thing is, on nice sunny days when I wake up feeling good and for a change Not thinking about him I'd be able to enjoy a walk in the park without running into he and the other woman...(happend yesterday)
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Tough call
